"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
Best examples of busting her chops ?
- Thread starter Thechamp
- Start date
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
VladPatton
Master Don Juan
Replace "outfit" with other zingers, such as perfume, shoes, stockings, glasses, watch, sexual acts. No, wait, scratch that last one.
You get the idea.
devilkingx2
Master Don Juan
if she hears about how hot she is constantly, negs work betterubercat said:
if she's not particularly used to compliments then negs are detrimental
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
So new girl at work, gorgeous, 8 maybe 9..... but married. So I figure I'd go hard, not like I have anything to lose or gain. So we (10+ ppl) are at an after work party, and she ends up sitting next to me by default. I notice my friends across the table are inching away as seats open up towards the front of the room, so I decide to move to join them. As I stand to leave I turn to her and tell her it was nice to meet her and sit next to her blah blah blah, but that I couldn't take the stank that followed her anymore and had to move to the other side of the room. The look on her face was worth every penny. Frozen in horror. I tried to tell her it was a joke as I walked away, but I think I was laughing too hard. Bet I was the first in a long time (if ever) to tell her not only did I need to get AWAY from her asap, but that she stank of rank. haha can't wait to see her in the office on Monday... should be real fun to resurrect the topic. "Hope you showered over the weekend, otherwise I'm going to ask that we teleconference this one . . ."