"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Being yourself or impressing a girl in regards to a guy's lifestyle?

crackers444

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I am wondering, when talking with a girl and she asks you for example "what do you do for fun?".Should you be yourself and tell her the truth or try and impress her and say you like to go to bars/drink(when in fact you don't do either), for not being seen as an outcast from the majority of young girl's and guys who do frequent bars/drink.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Climax

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Honesty is the best policy.

If there is something about yourself that you think needs working on, then work on it so that you wont have to lie to be proud to be you. ;)
 
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crackers444 said:
I am wondering, when talking with a girl and she asks you for example "what do you do for fun?".Should you be yourself and tell her the truth or try and impress her and say you like to go to bars/drink(when in fact you don't do either), for not being seen as an outcast from the majority of young girl's and guys who do frequent bars/drink.
I don't understand where you are coming from. Do you really think you can impress a woman by telling her you are just like every other chode out there?

More importantly, why are you reaction seeking? Why are you in a frame where you are assessing everything you say in terms of how much it impresses her?

Learn how to express your authentic self confidently. That is attractive.
 

Interceptor

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You can only do this in the most optimum manner once you have established GOOD Rapport.
Otherwise, be C+F and respectfully evade the questions. You must calibrate if her attempts at rapport are sincere, or genuine, and when exactly is she inserting them..at what stage of the interaction?

You don't always have to be 100 percent serious in your replies to her, in the first interactions, because you need to understand and show her you are not needy or desperate, and are not 'trying to impress' her or 'pursue' her, or trying to 'get her to like you."

You must be patient and disiplined though.
And recognize the exact moment she starts the rapport and comfort stages.
This is crucial.

See if you can wait for her to intitate the change in the interaction.



As a general rule, avoid trying to impress, and trying to Qualify yourself to her.
You can share similarities, commonalities, similar intererest, hobbies, etc.
But be well calibrated.


In addition, anytime you satisfy HER request for more informtation ALWAYS throw out one of your own.

Her: "What do you like to do for fun?"

You: (In Attraction) "I like to go waterboarding." (grin)

Her: "Cool. Sounds like fun!"

You: "silly girl! You don't know what waterboarding IS , do you??!" (laughs)

Her: "so, what do you like to do for fun?"

You: (in Rapport and comfort) "I like to do kickboxing, and go out with my friends. We like to go out to the beach and have a BBQ. Listen to music. I also like to go out to concerts, and yada yada (keep strong eye contact, be intimate, and stay close in proximity to her, stay warm to her)

So what do you like to do for fun?" (in rapport and comfort , you must do this)

Her: "Um..well. I like to yada yada and I also do kickboxing as well.."

You: (IOI and SOI right now) "Thats cool. I like that about you. You're independent and strong, and into fitness. That's sexy."




If it is not reciprocal she will realize it, and she will realize that you are desperate.
 
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Good topic! I was wondering this same exact thing! Because of my ex gf and probably my own nature, I really liked staying in and watching a movie with her and never was really into the bar/club scene that much, but I also liked going with her to different places - i.e. museums, the beach, Pasadena, Santa Monica, Venice, etc. I pretty much try to be honest for the most part, but I will fabricate slightly so as to not look too much like I dont go out.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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