The further I'm down the path of both, the more I realize that in the end I can only pick one. It's better to be good at one thing or another, than to be halfassed at both. Any of you guys have similar experiences?
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
So why do you feel that either one needs such a concentrated effort?Solarium said:The further I'm down the path of both, the more I realize that in the end I can only pick one. It's better to be good at one thing or another, than to be halfassed at both.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
It seems like the DJ mentality and being a doctor (humble, serious) don't mix. I'm currently in med school, and playing the girls here in my last 2 semesters got me a bad rep in a way. Here in an enclosed community of about 400 students who see each other every day, gossip spread pretty fast. I'm realizing that friends are more important than your sex life, especially when I may be working with the people who I fvcked with later on. We'll see though, of course I'm not totally abandoning the DJ mentality, since it has its own perks. I'm going to keep reading pook though to avoid going back to AFCish, but while trying to better myself I will also remain modest in a way that I get along with other people (especially other males).Francisco d'Anconia said:So why do you feel that either one needs such a concentrated effort?
DJs actually get along with anyone who's not intimidated by them.sandman6991 said:DJ's SHOULD get along with other males...
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
This sort of plays along with don't bang your coworkers. If your med school community is really that closed, then you should not use your DJ skills on it. Especially when there are plenty of other places to find women.Solarium said:It seems like the DJ mentality and being a doctor (humble, serious) don't mix. I'm currently in med school, and playing the girls here in my last 2 semesters got me a bad rep in a way. Here in an enclosed community of about 400 students who see each other every day, gossip spread pretty fast.
*Cough*(Bullsh1t)*Cough*Solarium said:It seems like the DJ mentality and being a doctor (humble, serious) don't mix.
You've just learned the lesson why a DJ should not go through with hooking up with anyone in a small town or at work. Being popular is one thing, getting the reputation of a player is another. Oh yeah, same goes for when you do your residency; stay away from the nurses! They can easily make your life a living hell.:nervous:Solarium said:I'm currently in med school, and playing the girls here in my last 2 semesters got me a bad rep in a way. Here in an enclosed community of about 400 students who see each other every day, gossip spread pretty fast. I'm realizing that friends are more important than your sex life, especially when I may be working with the people who I fvcked with later on.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
So don't DJ your school mates. Go out to bars/clubs/parties.Solarium said:It seems like the DJ mentality and being a doctor (humble, serious) don't mix. I'm currently in med school, and playing the girls here in my last 2 semesters got me a bad rep in a way. Here in an enclosed community of about 400 students who see each other every day, gossip spread pretty fast. I'm realizing that friends are more important than your sex life, especially when I may be working with the people who I fvcked with later on. We'll see though, of course I'm not totally abandoning the DJ mentality, since it has its own perks. I'm going to keep reading pook though to avoid going back to AFCish, but while trying to better myself I will also remain modest in a way that I get along with other people (especially other males).
Solarium said:The further I'm down the path of both, the more I realize that in the end I can only pick one. It's better to be good at one thing or another, than to be halfassed at both. Any of you guys have similar experiences?
Solarium said:It seems like the DJ mentality and being a doctor (humble, serious) don't mix. I'm currently in med school, and playing the girls here in my last 2 semesters got me a bad rep in a way. Here in an enclosed community of about 400 students who see each other every day, gossip spread pretty fast. I'm realizing that friends are more important than your sex life, especially when I may be working with the people who I fvcked with later on. We'll see though, of course I'm not totally abandoning the DJ mentality, since it has its own perks. I'm going to keep reading pook though to avoid going back to AFCish, but while trying to better myself I will also remain modest in a way that I get along with other people (especially other males).