That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Yes, I agree like the time my teenage daughter called up the child help line and made up a story that I was drunk and beating on her! still trying to pull that knife out of my back. Early years were good though, also theres an unexplainable element to being a parent, kind of like Hendrix said "are you experienced?" I think it was Hendrix. Good luck, keep a tight reign on him later on though.penkitten said:
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
You don't know that. I've heard that so many times and in the end, the guy (or gal) doesn't hold up their end of the bargin. It's much better for the kid to have to coupled parents (be them married or not, but at least together).Francisco d'Anconia said:
ouch!!!!englishman said:
WestCoaster said:
Bonez said:
Perhaps, but isn't it a bit premature to say that about Bonez? I feel alright believing he's a man of his word. His future actions may prove something different, time will tell.WestCoaster said:
Eh, that's questionable. Being married or even coupled causes problems in troubled relationships where the parents stay together for the sake of the children. Not too many people can put aside the pain of the broken relationship and they act bitter toward each other. The children end up suffering anyway, plus they're learning bad relationship skills from the parents.WestCoaster said:
That could happen as easily as they could end up committing to one another. Either way its their lives to do with it as they please. Bonez can start off either with some support or with the world against him. It just seems that some people want to give him support, it's not as if fathers get much of that nowadays.WestCoaster said:
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Hey, what are you trying to say???? :trouble:Bonez said:
Ummm...If you live in the US, you have to pay child support till age 18. Besides, at age 16 is when he needs a Dad most of all to knock some sense into his teen-aged head. Who's going to teach him to be a DJ? To be a MAN??? His Mommy? (She WILL teach him how to use a condom at least.)Bonez said:
Bonez said:
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Suit yourself, I will raise my son until he no longer needs me. I'll do my best to raise my son as fast as possible, just in case. Its not only for me, I've made my choices in life, and the only choice I'm making for my son is that when he gets older, he will be able to handle himself. With women, with money, and with his education.WestCoaster said:
So what do you suggest Bonez should do in his current situation?WestCoaster said:
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
If the lad is mature enought to handle college/job at 16, GREAT! Go forth and conquor!Francisco d'Anconia said:
I think you're missing the point. Bonez is planning on taking care of him.WaterTiger said:
Leave it alone Bonez. This is a thread about the other guy, the ones who don't raise their children.Bonez said:
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.