Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Back to square 1

showoff3civic

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Hey guys been a member for a long time and have not ever posted here. Back in 2006 I used the forum to get some decent game before I met my g/f of the past 2 1/2 years. We just broke up and I am dumb founded because it seems like it has been so long and I am not quite ready to move on but I am. Anyways, My cousin and I were in starbucks the other day and I saw this attractive young lady (i am 25 btw). I said to myself I am going to talk to her, then it hit me, I started getting nervous and doubting myself. I ended up not doing it because I chickened out, the rest of the night i kept kicking myself in the ass because I have never had the issue of talking to people. I am in sales for god sakes! Anybody have any tips to keep me from doing this again, I know I can do it I still cannot find out why I froze! Also where is good places to meet girls because I live in vermont...... seems like the barren waste land with snow, it seems like everywhere I go there are highschool girls everywhere but nobody my age. I do not want to go the bar route but maybe I can pick up some pointers to help me pick up girls at the bar.

Thanks in advance,
Jroll
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Dannyrt34

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showoff3civic said:
I do not want to go the bar route but maybe I can pick up some pointers to help me pick up girls at the bar.
I have 3 field reports on here from the bar in the last 3 weeks, I don't feel like finding them, haha. But maybe you can do a search.

Well, since you've been out of the game for a while, it might take a bit of effort to find your old self again. Just go out and practice as often as you can. Different approaches work differently for everyone, but I have found that it seems like situational openers work great for most.

With situational openers, you can usually pick out anything from you're environment.

For example, that girl at starbucks. You could have walked up to her and said "Hey, I'm in the mood for something sweet, what coffee do you recommend?" When she gives you her opinion, then perhaps you could have asked "What do you like about that one?"

These are OPEN ENDED questions, she can't answer with a yes or no, they work great. Plus they let her talk about herself and her own opinions, which women love doing. And after these two lines you can usually switch the conversation up into anything you want. If things go well, you throw in some flirty lines.

Once you realize how easy it is, you'll wonder why you ever thought it was hard. You may always be nervous, but you can still always get better!
 

showoff3civic

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Dannyrt34 said:
I have 3 field reports on here from the bar in the last 3 weeks, I don't feel like finding them, haha. But maybe you can do a search.

Well, since you've been out of the game for a while, it might take a bit of effort to find your old self again. Just go out and practice as often as you can. Different approaches work differently for everyone, but I have found that it seems like situational openers work great for most.

With situational openers, you can usually pick out anything from you're environment.

For example, that girl at starbucks. You could have walked up to her and said "Hey, I'm in the mood for something sweet, what coffee do you recommend?" When she gives you her opinion, then perhaps you could have asked "What do you like about that one?"

These are OPEN ENDED questions, she can't answer with a yes or no, they work great. Plus they let her talk about herself and her own opinions, which women love doing. And after these two lines you can usually switch the conversation up into anything you want. If things go well, you throw in some flirty lines.

Once you realize how easy it is, you'll wonder why you ever thought it was hard. You may always be nervous, but you can still always get better!
good words thanks for the advice, tomorrow im going hunting hehehe see what there is downtown. I will try your advice since i love starbucks so much!
 
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showoff3civic said:
Anybody have any tips to keep me from doing this again, I know I can do it I still cannot find out why I froze! Also where is good places to meet girls because I live in vermont......
Danny's right. Just use the world around you and "feel her out." Unless she's giving you signals that she's already interested in you (staring, playing with the hair, standing extremely close to you), say something that will allow you to gauge her level of interest in you. Even if its just "Hello" and a smile. If she shields herself away, she's not interested. If she is just friendly, proceed (she could be interested or maybe she's just being polite. If she becomes flirty, definitely proceed.

Although Vermont is small, I've definitely messed around with some VT females :rockon: (Burlington to be exact).

You'll get it. Just keep practicing and stay social
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Dannyrt34

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showoff3civic said:
good words thanks for the advice, tomorrow im going hunting hehehe see what there is downtown. I will try your advice since i love starbucks so much!
Haha. Good luck bud! Keep us updated. We'll be here to listen if things go well (or bad).
 
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