Back in the field again....

Epimanes

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 15, 2012
Messages
1,276
Reaction score
616
Age
46
Well fvck..... I'm back in the field again and my Divorce is final (yay!)

Had a woman living with me for a bit after a year of dating Her. We lived together for 1.5yrs after so 2.5 yrs.. what a fkn mistake that was... ugh kicked her out before the "common law 2yrs" here in BC Canada... she liked to fvck alot.. way more than me... but I found out she was hiding debt and so I sent her on her way because otherwise.. the common-law thing would put her debt as partly my responsibility also... not having it.

Anyways... as a 44yo... things are not the same anymore in the dating world. OLD is hit and miss (couple dates but no sex, but that was my choice because I just wasn't feeling it and a couple catfishes)... I'm going to my work gym (no ones ever in it) but not as often as I should because family **** and work keeps getting in the way and run out of energy at the end of the day.

I'm reasonably fit... bald (mr clean is a good depiction) 6'2... 203lbs.. and honestly I'm feeling invisible to the world at my age.

The whole Me too thing is big here ... no one wants to be approached and everyone looks bitchy lol. Hard to tell who's my age or in my age range lol... I could hit on women at work there is tons of em... but I don't Wana **** where I eat.

Any pointers for an old guy like me? Lol...
 
Joined
Nov 26, 2022
Messages
102
Reaction score
98
Just get out there buddy, get on online dating and hit the clubs. Get back in the groove. Mix them up. Do not expect your first interactions/dates all to go well or have any expectations, play what's natural to you. Key is not to be shy and if you feel you can build Kino and be touchy go for it. The dating game changes month by month, and Instagram has ruined everything. Best to hit all modes of dating.
 

Epimanes

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 15, 2012
Messages
1,276
Reaction score
616
Age
46
Ha... good advice... shyts so different now... I can't do the Instagram bs.. if a woman has Instagram bs going on.. I'm not interested. Tells me she has a huge ego she needs to fill and likely won't end.
 

RazorRambo24

Banned
Joined
Dec 30, 2022
Messages
1,225
Reaction score
1,393
Age
32
I would say make yourself as available as possible. This means go out places that are conducive to striking conversations up. Plan out events, buy tickets to events, festivals, concerts, make a few dating profiles with some nice pictures and swipe through to build presence about 10 mins a day..

The rest shall happen naturally. P.S. Dress decent , like have a sense of fashion and wear Good cologne, not cheap cologne. Good cologne with nice sillage and projection will get you compliments from women and make it easier to strike conversations.
 

jaymbrs

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 27, 2017
Messages
1,989
Reaction score
1,995
Age
37
What's your social circle like? IMO it's extremely beneficial to have a good social circle to help with getting back out and meeting people.
 

Peaks&Valleys

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 11, 2013
Messages
1,954
Reaction score
349
Well fvck..... I'm back in the field again and my Divorce is final (yay!)

Had a woman living with me for a bit after a year of dating Her. We lived together for 1.5yrs after so 2.5 yrs.. what a fkn mistake that was... ugh kicked her out before the "common law 2yrs" here in BC Canada... she liked to fvck alot.. way more than me... but I found out she was hiding debt and so I sent her on her way because otherwise.. the common-law thing would put her debt as partly my responsibility also... not having it.

Anyways... as a 44yo... things are not the same anymore in the dating world. OLD is hit and miss (couple dates but no sex, but that was my choice because I just wasn't feeling it and a couple catfishes)... I'm going to my work gym (no ones ever in it) but not as often as I should because family **** and work keeps getting in the way and run out of energy at the end of the day.

I'm reasonably fit... bald (mr clean is a good depiction) 6'2... 203lbs.. and honestly I'm feeling invisible to the world at my age.

The whole Me too thing is big here ... no one wants to be approached and everyone looks bitchy lol. Hard to tell who's my age or in my age range lol... I could hit on women at work there is tons of em... but I don't Wana **** where I eat.

Any pointers for an old guy like me? Lol...
Not gonna lie. Damn...... but you kinda sound gay.

It's alright, my friend. All good here. Own it.
 

Epimanes

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 15, 2012
Messages
1,276
Reaction score
616
Age
46
Gay... lol... heck no.

My social circle isn't great. I'm tryin to rebuild it. Having been married to a narcissist for 25yrs.... (hard to see forest when standing in trees) ... took its toll on our friends and family... lost alot.

I'm not in a huge hurry for puzzy... it just seems bleak in today's day and age.
 

Bigpapa

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 17, 2020
Messages
3,166
Reaction score
2,476
Age
124
Gay... lol... heck no.

My social circle isn't great. I'm tryin to rebuild it. Having been married to a narcissist for 25yrs.... (hard to see forest when standing in trees) ... took its toll on our friends and family... lost alot.

I'm not in a huge hurry for puzzy... it just seems bleak in today's day and age.
So you got married at 19 ?
 

Epimanes

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 15, 2012
Messages
1,276
Reaction score
616
Age
46
I have 2 kids that are adults now. They are 19 and 25 now. They both live with me and are working on their careers.

The reality is I should have left her long ago... but I didn't want to repeat whay happened to me with my kids. So I stayed at the cost of my own mental health for the longest time. She told me often to go ahead and leave. That she would take my kids from me.. take half my money, and get a new guy. She would often say it sounded like a good plan.

She was hot.... and she had my kids.. and it wasnt always bad, the first 18yrs were pretty good. But the last few years were hell... i tried so hard to keep things together regardless. Is what it is.


You can go back in my history here and see my story. Too much info there to repeat it all.
 
Joined
Nov 26, 2022
Messages
102
Reaction score
98
Ha... good advice... shyts so different now... I can't do the Instagram bs.. if a woman has Instagram bs going on.. I'm not interested. Tells me she has a huge ego she needs to fill and likely won't end.

Hey I used to think like you, but it is best to adapt to the times and try to learn everything. Have a mind that is open to everything but attached to nothing.
 

Epimanes

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 15, 2012
Messages
1,276
Reaction score
616
Age
46
Hey I used to think like you, but it is best to adapt to the times and try to learn everything. Have a mind that is open to everything but attached to nothing.
Yeah... working on that. It's weird having such a closed off heart now. Never used to be so aloof... work in progress
 

Ricky

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 9, 2002
Messages
3,955
Reaction score
718
Age
50
Yeah... working on that. It's weird having such a closed off heart now. Never used to be so aloof... work in progress
I think a key is to give off the vibe that you truly love women and that you are a charismatic and unapologetic seducer of them.

alot of men only flirt with the women they are interested in. I flirt with all of them. It keeps my skills sharp and them guessing as to who i really like
 

The Duke

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 4, 2008
Messages
5,392
Reaction score
7,895
Welcome back @Epimanes good to see you. Been a minute.
 

Epimanes

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 15, 2012
Messages
1,276
Reaction score
616
Age
46
Thanks man! Appreciate it
 

Foe

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 14, 2021
Messages
179
Reaction score
170
Age
45
first 18yrs were pretty good.
High chance shes not a narcissist. Everyone appears to be a narcissist to there ex's due to the common traits (lack of empathy etc) but ultimately she showed you her true colours, shes a b!tch. The measure of a good person is how they treat someone they dont value, or have nothing to gain from and in your case when you became worthless to her she treated you like crap. This is who she is, a vacant hole.

I have a similar history to you, my ex is a raging b!tch but its just because shes a sh!tty person, not a sociopath, narcissist or any member of the dark triad. That being said I have dated a narc and a BPD since her and there is a distinct difference.

We are the same age, similiar history (I only did 16 years) and I can tell you your at your peak. This is your time to shine, all you have to do is get your ducks in a row and start ruining the game. Spin plates, be reckless and get your charm on point. The rest falls in place.

Im only 3 weeks out of a steaming hot BPD relationship and as one member said on here I got my moneys worth. Enjoy the moments available and let the future sort it self out.
 

Gamisch

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 2, 2022
Messages
3,291
Reaction score
4,072
I think a key is to give off the vibe that you truly love women and that you are a charismatic and unapologetic seducer of them.

alot of men only flirt with the women they are interested in. I flirt with all of them. It keeps my skills sharp and them guessing as to who i really like
Yes! My philosophy is to "seduce the whole world " without any exceptions .

Being charismatic in general is like shadow boxing; it's preparation for when you really need to " throw down with a hb7 or higher" .

You cant go from socially isolated to being charismatic for the hb7+ at will unless you are a REAL natural.
 

Epimanes

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 15, 2012
Messages
1,276
Reaction score
616
Age
46
High chance shes not a narcissist. Everyone appears to be a narcissist to there ex's due to the common traits (lack of empathy etc) but ultimately she showed you her true colours, shes a b!tch. The measure of a good person is how they treat someone they dont value, or have nothing to gain from and in your case when you became worthless to her she treated you like crap. This is who she is, a vacant hole.

I have a similar history to you, my ex is a raging b!tch but its just because shes a sh!tty person, not a sociopath, narcissist or any member of the dark triad. That being said I have dated a narc and a BPD since her and there is a distinct difference.

We are the same age, similiar history (I only did 16 years) and I can tell you your at your peak. This is your time to shine, all you have to do is get your ducks in a row and start ruining the game. Spin plates, be reckless and get your charm on point. The rest falls in place.

Im only 3 weeks out of a steaming hot BPD relationship and as one member said on here I got my moneys worth. Enjoy the moments available and let the future sort it self out.
I wonder tho.... blaming our kids for abandonment when they decided to move with me cuz they didn't like new guy that came the month after we split. After we had been together 25yrs.He came to stay for a month too. Kids be wtf.... she moved and said she had to cuz they didn't want to be with her anymore so she moved to Quebec from BC. She doesn't even speak to her daughter anymore and only speaks to our son occasionally via text.

Maybe she isn't narc... but she was Also a closet alcoholic too... I didn't know. My daughter waa hiding it.. cleaning her up unbeknownst to me. Til I came home early one day and found her passed out with bottle in hand on hallway floor. She kept arms Reach and breadcrumbs her affections unless I had a few drinks too... she spiraled... I couldn't stop it... like trying to hold water in your hands.

I'm actually in therapy for some of the BS thay went on cuz she totally deflated me... constantly Threatned me with taking kids from me knowing I'd nvr leave my kids...eventually I was on depression meds... and going insane.. her mantra for sex was.. "you have to have consent, if you have to ask the answer is no, don't touch Me without permission it's abuse, sex has to happen naturally"

So.... I'm so reserved now.. it sucks. Tryin to undo that is fkn hard... hence therapy .. but can only afford to go once a month .. hate admitting I'm even doing therapy.. but... is what it is.
 
M

member160292

Guest
Welcome back, Epimanes
The last post was a tough read, better days ahead my friend!
 
Top