"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Are you paying for your AFC past?

Nighthawk

Master Don Juan
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I've only met my real father once. Guess I'll be seeing him again at my brother's forthcoming gay wedding.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Desdinova

Master Don Juan
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If I were in your shoes, I would probably be honest and bring it all out, and explain why I'm unhappy with them.
Dude, you have no idea. I tried that, and they deny what they've done. They end up lying to my face and painting themselves as upstanding people who would NEVER do such things! I'm completely blown away at how these people can deliberately lie to my face about things that have happened. Then it just escelates from there.

and tell them you love them
Sorry man, but I'm not going to stoop to their level and lie to them.

Desdinova, we have been on a particularily good footing on this website and I know that you are a smart guy. You know what you got to do.
Yeah, no 5hit - take my own advice. "If a person is subtracting from your happiness, then it's time to eliminate them from your life." It's kinda kinda sad how I've tried to develop a good relationship with them, and it never works. It's time to quit beating my head against the wall.
 

djbr

Master Don Juan
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Desdinova said:
Dude, you have no idea. I tried that, and they deny what they've done. They end up lying to my face and painting themselves as upstanding people who would NEVER do such things! I'm completely blown away at how these people can deliberately lie to my face about things that have happened. Then it just escelates from there.
My mother does exactly the same thing. She talks huge amounts of sh1t to my face and later say she did not say anything like that, how could her!

Desdinova said:
Yeah, no 5hit - take my own advice. "If a person is subtracting from your happiness, then it's time to eliminate them from your life." It's kinda kinda sad how I've tried to develop a good relationship with them, and it never works. It's time to quit beating my head against the wall.
Your own advice is great.
 

grinder

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The old saying, “You can pick your friends but not your relatives” applies. My parents are both long dead.

I had, what you would call a “memorandum of understanding” with my parents. It quite literally was a set of rules I went by that kept them at arm’s length away, and not in my business.

My mom was just a flat out bad person. You don’t love people like that you just make arrangements to “handle” their behaviour.

I was quite patronizing and condescending to them both and yes, to my mom, I lied and said “I love you”, but, it was part of the arrangement to keep the peace. Who the fvck says you have to tell them the truth all the time?

Diplomacy involves the periodic partaking of sh*t and enjoying it as a delicacy for all to see.
 

Holland

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My parents think it's all great that I have a relationship with an awesome girl now. But my parents are pretty cool people and always wanted the best for me. They just never taught me the right stuff ( they weren't able to).

Some of my old friends envy me. But they know who is boss now. WTF we're they going to do about it?
Some are too proud to acknowledge my succes or listen to the advice I give them, too bad for them.
Others do (the less succesfull ones) and they even got succes out of it, then screwed it up by getting waaaaay to excited and turned into AFC mode.

I think it's hilarious. I tell them: Take my advice.
Then they refuse, and crash and burn after they kiss closed a girl one time. :crackup:

I agree that a lot of people try to sabotage you, especially relatives.
I just see those events as tests and challenges, so I can conquer them and end up laughing at how pathetic those people (relatives) are afterwards.
I cut off those people from influencing me. You really get to see who your real friends are.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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