Are you a leader?

[The Gamer]

Are you a leader? If so, why? If not, why not? What makes a leader? Does being a natural leader get you women? Discuss...

 

[The Bat]

You go first.

 

[mikeraw]

This is an interesting topic. I hope it develops into something useful.

The way I consider myself a leader is by having options to choose from and by having enough confidence in myself that people emulate me.

For instance... If a group of my friends want to go to a club and I dont want to go, I tell them that I dont like that particular club and am instead going out with others... I'm social enough that they recognize that they will meet girls with meand/or have a good time, so they either change their plans to do what I suggest or I give them the impression that I had such an awesome time with the other group of friends that they learn their lesson and the following time they do what I suggest.

Also, whenever I walk into whatever place, I am so confident that I'm the best at certain things so I guess people follow my lead in the drinks that I order, conversations to engage in, even body language. Dressing nice and staying in shape help out a lot in that.

 

[st_99]

Good topic,

Unfortunately, no, I do not consider myself a leader.

Various reasons I guess which include (in no particular order):

- never have been comfortable being the center of attention

- slight social anxiety

- lean towards the introverted side of the fence

- am pretty indecisive about many things, leaders need to take a stand (this is a big one)

- not comfortable with confrontation

- have a hard time expressing emotion

- have always preferred working out situations/issues/problems on my own instead of by committee or a support group

- a few other things...


I would say the major reason though is not being comfortable leading unless I am 100% confident and knowledgeable in the topic on which I am attempting to lead.

For example, If I were on a road trip with a bunch of people I wouldn't want to take charge because I have a terrible sense of direction.

I notice a lot of so called leaders just pretend to know, even when they are not 100% sure of something, and sound confident in what they are saying, so people look at them as leaders.

I have a very hard time doing that.

 

[Jitterbug]

I am a leader, although I still have much to learn as I'm still very young. To me, the qualities of a leader are (and I do practice all of them):

- Step forward when others are hesitating.
- Make a decision when others are indecisive.
- Take charge when others are panicking.
- Boldly go where noone dared.
- Be protective of your crew and instill confidence in them.
- And even when you lead it wrong, you lead it strong!

I started early. At primary school, I used to play army and I was the general leading my class mates into battle against kids from other classes.

- lean towards the introverted side of the fence

I think introversion/extroversion is too simplified when it comes to defining a leader. A leader has a commanding presence in group situations and is a people's person, but also can be a fearless lone wolf if he finds himself in such circumstances.

- have always preferred working out situations/issues/problems on my own instead of by committee or a support group

I don't think that necessarily means it's not a leadership quality. A leader should be able to work out solutions on his own. It's precisely situations where other people fail that they need a leader to direct them out of troubles.

Does being a natural leader get you women?

They get some, they lose some. Leaders get women, for sure, but getting a particular woman? Maybe not. Many famous leaders in history failed to get their women, or "got" women that we don't think much of. However, I have no doubt that women were far from the top of their priorities.

 

[mrRuckus]

I wouldn't think introversion would affect leadership. Introversion doesn't mean shy. Never heard of a strong, silent type?