"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Are there any Women DJs here too?

A

AJ84

Guest
I enjoy reading the site, gaining some insight, offering some insight when I can, like most people who visit forums.

I personally read a lot of good posts and great advice from many of the guys in is forum, in particular around not being a sucker, self improvement, having realistic expectations, etc. Some of what I read here I think is useful for my own relationship with my husband. It's also interesting to get the perspective of men out in the dating pool, because I already know how women feel about dating and relationships. I see many parallels.

Sometimes I will read a post where I feel like a women's perspective would be helpful. I know, before I even post a reply, that there is a chance that someone will throw out an insult or make a dig about a woman posting, but I will post anyway and take it from there.

If someone doesn't want to read my posts because I don't have a penis that's cool. If someone doesn't agree and we get into a debate, well, that's part of the premise behind forums, people posting different views. Some people throw personal insults if they are not capable of debating in a mature way or are too sensitive to disagreements. For me, I try not to take it personally, because at the end of the day, it's a forum comprised of anonymous people a million times removed from each other's personal lives, and getting upset over it is an emotional investment that is best spent on people in one's personal life, not an anonymous forum.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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