KneghtRyder
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Dec 6, 2006
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or do women still hold out for 3 to 4 dates before putting out....
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
WTF? There are girls here? lolpenkitten said:you see this is where things get tricky, trying to explain the hold out plan to guys.
as chicks, we are taught to try to hold out to date number 3.
why? so we arent seen as hors.
do we always stick to it? no.
sometimes its faster than that, and its either because we really really want you, or we just dont care if we ever see you again.
however, if you are dating a chick thats a virgin, shes probally not going to be giving it up to you by the third date.
but if you are dating a chick that has been around, if you dont get it by date number three, you proablly aint gonna get it. EVER.
but that is just my two cents...
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
yes dude, some of us are chicks on here.Vypros said:WTF? There are girls here? lol
I have to ask...why?penkitten said:yes dude, some of us are chicks on here.
in the back of our minds, we know you are wondering this, so we plan to answer with the number four if you ever ask. :crackup:ozzfest said:penkitten...actually pleasant to hear a women's perspective. As a guy I'm thrilled to get it on the 1st date , but also in the back of my mind wondering "how many other guys nailed her on the 1st date too"?
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Ummm, because they don't have penis'....Vypros said:I have to ask...why?
So, what you are saying is that you use sex as a form of control over guys?penkitten said:in the back of our minds, we know you are wondering this, so we plan to answer with the number four if you ever ask. :crackup:
at some point, we try to sort out the respectable guys, and not give it up to them on the first date, because most of them disappear if you give it up too soon.
however, if i didnt give it up by date three, they were just my friend.
yes we do. we always have and we always will. (do a search and you will see countless threads containing this information posted by all kinds of men.)Vypros said:So, what you are saying is that you use sex as a form of control over guys?
I've heard this viewpoint from other girls before and it boggles my mind that a girl will be more likely to sleep with someone she DOESN'T like on the first date and make the men she DOES like wait a while for sex.
Sit back and look at what I just said and ask yourself what the hell you are thinking?
Eh, I knew this much.penkitten said:yes we do. we always have and we always will. (do a search and you will see countless threads containing this information posted by all kinds of men.)
yes thats what i said and meant.
we "feel" and do what we feel is right at the moment. if we had time to sit down and think things thru, this is logical to us. a fling will come and go, but a good guy will stick around. these are the kinds of things that we are taught and experienced at least once, that makes us continue to think this way.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Yeah, I know that's what they do, I'm just looking for some logical reasoning behind it.ryannath said:Vypros, I am not a woman, but that is exactly right what you said. Some women that like you will not give it up on the first date so you won't disappear. But, some women that don't even like you, will give it up because that's all they see that guy as is a way to get a nut. Women are more and more like men nowadays, and you have to adapt to this lifestyle.
yes but if the guy is going to hit it and disappear, we would rather him do it sooner than later.Vypros said:Yeah, I know that's what they do, I'm just looking for some logical reasoning behind it.
The simple fact is: If a guy likes you HE IS GOING TO STAY WITH YOU WHETHER YOU GIVE IT UP ON DATE 1 OR DATE 29.
So making a guy wait for it is kind of pointless. A guy who is going to hit it and disappear is going to hit it and disappear whether he gets it on date 1 or date 9.
More women need to realize this.
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.