"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Aquard Silence

P

pilot0001

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One particular untouched subject everyone seems to deal with is the aquard silence. Its been my theory lately those silent moments won't be so aquard if you don't let it be. Let me explain.

Women seem to be wonderful at guaging our comfort levels. Your talking to them and that silence comes up. Thinking every good DJ should keep the conversationg going ALL THE TIME you guys start to sweat it and girls sence that.

Don't run the women over by constantly trying to lead the convo. Don't waste those silent moments by trying to think of something to say about yourself. Women can tell when your trying to push something so don't try and push it. Just give them a nice smile and enjoy the silence... Be comfortable with it, don't let it be so aquard to you and it won't be so much to her.

The conversation isn't comming to an end. Your little silence won't end all your chances with her. Don't sweat it and she won't either. Now when you get back into the convo she'll give you clues as to what to bring up. JUST RELAX!!!! Don't sweat it.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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T

the lionheart

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The awkward silence is something I haven't yet had a problem with, nor had a problem with keeping the conversation running. The only way a girl's going to realize that you're trying to get her to keep going about herself is everytime if you end up going back to the same run of the mill questions asking her what she's doing or whatever.
 
O

oOh Nasty

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just be interested in the conversation.

oh and btw...no offense but how old are you? your grammar/spelling is pretty awful.

~1~
oOh Nasty
 
B

bluenorther

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I knew a genius-IQ woman who sometimes would go quiet, but she was really winding up to say something thoughtful. I had to learn to stop and let her talk.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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