The Next Big Thing
Don Juan
- Joined
- Aug 4, 2013
- Messages
- 63
- Reaction score
- 11
This is a topic which is really important for me and I believe also for many others because of many reasons. But most importantly, I think many men feel like me, that they are really social and good with women if they are talking with them already but the issue arises when you haven´t talked to her yet and have not a "legitimate" reason to talk to her.
I am talking about situation which has happened to me so many times in my life and I never acted upon it so I am full of regrets. It is when I walk down the street or I am in a bus/train/metro and I see a girl I find absolutely gorgeous, like literally my type and I want to get to know her so much. For me 2 basic issues arise:
1.When to approach?
and
2.How to approach?
By the "WHEN to approach" I mean 2 situations:
1.) the woman noticed you - a) seems interested (eye contact, staying close to you, smiling...)
-approach? - YES!
b) seems neutral/non-interested
-approach? - this is what I am not sure about, yes or no?
2.) the woman hasn´t noticed you - approach? - probably yes...but accomodate based on her initial reaction
What do you think? What is your opinion and what would you do in these situations?
By the "HOW to approach" I mean literally how to approach, what to say to this girl/woman depending on the situations I described above.
Obviously, it is the easiest when you are almost 100 % sure she wants you to approach her...that is why I got so much regrets that I didn´t do it so many times.
But then there is the situation when you cannot realize if she is interested or not and also the situation when she hasnt noticed you (PLUS she can have also headphones...or she noticed you BUT has headphones...or she noticed you, you thought she was maybe interested, but after a while you make no move she puts headphones lol).
I saw couple of videos on youtube where the guys kept it simple and honest. First they asked for directions (even though they didnt need them) and then they said something like "Actually, Im gonna be honest with you, I just wanted to talk with you because I thought you are very cute and gorgeous and I just wanted to introduce myself and get to know you." and proceed the conversation from there.
Do you think this is a good approach? Would you suggest something different?
Also last issue is with getting the girl´s number or something else to contact her (instagram, FB, etc...) DURING TIME CONSTRAINTS. Even though I have never approach a girl with that line I just described, I met some girls who I basically didnt know so to speak but I decided to break the ice and when I do that I think Im quite good at it, but Im struggling now with the part how to get her number or whatever if we have just limited amount to speak. I know girls who after maybe 20 minutes of talking didnt give me their contact ... well, they just said they dont have that particular platform but I think if they would really want to stay in touch they would suggest a different one.
I also know girls who I have talked to for less time but they seemed really interested but also said they dont have the particular platform (instagram in this case), so I didnt even ask for the number.
This is why I really dont know how am I supposed to get a girl´s contact after such an extremely short time talking after we just met when I came up to her completely randomly (street, stop, bus, whatever...). I dont know if it is just here in Europe but some girls make such a big deal out of it, I thought it is natural to ask for a contact for someone you would like to hangout with...but now Im so hesitant to even ask because usually they just freeze like I want their soul or something lol ... and I really dont know why, Im not a creep or anything, most people who know me say Im extremely social and good with girls and thats why this just gets on my nerves lol.
So we got 3 problems regarding approaching stranger girls/women:
1.When to approach?
2.How to approach?
3.How to get her contact under time contraints
I am really looking for some good advice sharing here. I know this is a community full of experienced and wise people so let´s get it on.
Thank you advance for your answers!
I am talking about situation which has happened to me so many times in my life and I never acted upon it so I am full of regrets. It is when I walk down the street or I am in a bus/train/metro and I see a girl I find absolutely gorgeous, like literally my type and I want to get to know her so much. For me 2 basic issues arise:
1.When to approach?
and
2.How to approach?
By the "WHEN to approach" I mean 2 situations:
1.) the woman noticed you - a) seems interested (eye contact, staying close to you, smiling...)
-approach? - YES!
b) seems neutral/non-interested
-approach? - this is what I am not sure about, yes or no?
2.) the woman hasn´t noticed you - approach? - probably yes...but accomodate based on her initial reaction
What do you think? What is your opinion and what would you do in these situations?
By the "HOW to approach" I mean literally how to approach, what to say to this girl/woman depending on the situations I described above.
Obviously, it is the easiest when you are almost 100 % sure she wants you to approach her...that is why I got so much regrets that I didn´t do it so many times.
But then there is the situation when you cannot realize if she is interested or not and also the situation when she hasnt noticed you (PLUS she can have also headphones...or she noticed you BUT has headphones...or she noticed you, you thought she was maybe interested, but after a while you make no move she puts headphones lol).
I saw couple of videos on youtube where the guys kept it simple and honest. First they asked for directions (even though they didnt need them) and then they said something like "Actually, Im gonna be honest with you, I just wanted to talk with you because I thought you are very cute and gorgeous and I just wanted to introduce myself and get to know you." and proceed the conversation from there.
Do you think this is a good approach? Would you suggest something different?
Also last issue is with getting the girl´s number or something else to contact her (instagram, FB, etc...) DURING TIME CONSTRAINTS. Even though I have never approach a girl with that line I just described, I met some girls who I basically didnt know so to speak but I decided to break the ice and when I do that I think Im quite good at it, but Im struggling now with the part how to get her number or whatever if we have just limited amount to speak. I know girls who after maybe 20 minutes of talking didnt give me their contact ... well, they just said they dont have that particular platform but I think if they would really want to stay in touch they would suggest a different one.
I also know girls who I have talked to for less time but they seemed really interested but also said they dont have the particular platform (instagram in this case), so I didnt even ask for the number.
This is why I really dont know how am I supposed to get a girl´s contact after such an extremely short time talking after we just met when I came up to her completely randomly (street, stop, bus, whatever...). I dont know if it is just here in Europe but some girls make such a big deal out of it, I thought it is natural to ask for a contact for someone you would like to hangout with...but now Im so hesitant to even ask because usually they just freeze like I want their soul or something lol ... and I really dont know why, Im not a creep or anything, most people who know me say Im extremely social and good with girls and thats why this just gets on my nerves lol.
So we got 3 problems regarding approaching stranger girls/women:
1.When to approach?
2.How to approach?
3.How to get her contact under time contraints
I am really looking for some good advice sharing here. I know this is a community full of experienced and wise people so let´s get it on.
Thank you advance for your answers!