Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Approaching Game in a different way


Master Don Juan
Jan 17, 2020
Reaction score
So there is this theory that I have been reading online about the Mere Exposure effect.

Opening, hooking, and getting their contact details with upwards of 100% success rate is possible. The reason this is possible is because I learned how to turn it into a hard skill. Hard skills are something you can learn to do, repeat the sequence of steps, and have success nearly every time. Soft skills are more like an art where you learn the structure, practice it, and every time you finish you'll have a slightly different outcome. Think painting a picture. Some will be better than others, some will be complete ****, and others will be a work of art. That is a soft skill. Anyway, opening, hooking, and closing is a hard skill following the proper sequencing. Now that being said, that doesn't mean you'll have attraction or the number won't flake. That's where non-verbals, preselection, and all the other aspects of “game” and attraction comes into play. More on that later. For now I just want to cover the sequencing I spoke of a moment ago:
  1. Mere Exposure
  2. Opening Lines
  3. Trigger a smile
  4. Approach
  5. Qualifying Statements
  6. Disqualifying Others
  7. Ask an Opinion
  8. Lock In!
One of the most important rules of indirect game is to never make it feel or seem like you're hitting on them. The two main things that give away your intentions is poor delivery and shoddy body language. If you're delivery is off at best you'll look like you're hitting on her, possibly try-hard, and at worst just plain creepy. Just keep that in the back of you mind when doing these since you don't want to give the impressing you're hitting on them. You want it to feel like you're just two people having a peasant chat or small talk, bull****ting as some call it, and not actually an attempted pickup. So many guys telegraph way too much interest and their intent is clear as day. So how do you hit on them without hitting on them?
Pre-open. When you first hit the venue do what is known as pre-opening. This is when you do a brief approach, exchange names, and leave them on a high note. Doing so should last no more than a few seconds. You're in, out, and gone. This really trips them up because you're actually walking up to them, talking to them (only guys that hit on them do this, right?), but then you leave! That can't be right? If you're hitting on them why did you just walk off? You know what they're thinking, “Hmm... maybe he's not actually hitting on me after all.” If they automatically assume you're hitting on them, which most will, especially during night game, this will really throw them off guard. That's how indirect game should operate. However, I'm getting a little ahead of myself. Before you can walk away you first must approach them. There are several different types of openers and the 3 I want to focus on are Functional, Compliment, and Observational (aka Situational) openers:
  • Functional openers are the easiest and most socially acceptable openers to use. However, they're the toughest to transition from. An example of a Functional opener is “Do you have the time? I think my watch is running slow.”, “Do you know if there are any good specials here tonight? I'm getting tired of the same old xyz.”, “Do you know where the bathrooms are? I can't find them anywhere and my friend is about to make a mess!” and so on.
  • Compliment openers are just as they sound. You give a compliment, exchange names, and you're gone. An example of this would be, “That's a great dress. I like how it makes you stand out from the crowd.”
  • Observational openers are just as they sound. You're commenting on the environment around you and are the most powerful as it creates a commonality and are spontaneous. As I mentioned above you don't want to give the impression of hitting on them, and observational openers have a tendency to do that as they can come across as try-hard with bad delivery. Instead of talking to the woman about whatever it is you're observing, talk about it to your friend (wing). Then you bring the woman into the conversation by what should seem as happenstance because she just happens to be the one standing there at the time your conversation took place. Now because you were already discussing it with your wing it's not hitting on them, but just conversing with someone else nearby about that cool or strange widget you just noticed. An example would be “<wing> check that out! Look at that picture and this one over here. (Said to the woman...) Do you see that? They're all the same pictures, they're just different color! I wonder how many people even notice that? Weird, huh?”
There are three main rules when doing a pre-opener:
  1. Justify why you're talking to them. Those familiar with Neil Strauss' style of game would call this “rooting the opener”. Same idea really. If you look at the example's I gave for each opener they all have a justifying statement included.
  2. Always exchange names and do a handshake if able.
  3. Tell them it was nice meeting them and/or to have a good day/night, then eject politely.
Once you've done 15-20 minutes of pre-opening in the venue your mere exposure effect should be climbing. And I do want to say that pre-opening is not the same as warm-up sets. While warm-up sets can raise your mere exposure effect, they're not the same since pre-opening keeps it brief and it's not an extended duration conversation. Anyway, after that short time of pre-opening, now it's time to start approaching earlier women you pre-opened. Scan the venue for women you've talked to and use non-verbal communication to get them to smile. I've found almost 100% of the women I've pre-opened will smile when doing this. Congratulations, when they smile at you they've just given you an approach invitation! Yes fellas, it's that simple. What do you do when they give you that approach invitation? It's simple... you lock eye contact, keep smiling, and go straight in.


Master Don Juan
Jan 14, 2018
Reaction score
Somewhere where's it's none of your business
The nerds will eat this up and be excited enough to celebrate in the pubs later on - they finally got a step by step procedure to follow, thinking OMG DATA never lies, we'll be swimming in pussies !

Then the ones who's actually actively fvcking women will read this and think...."i don't even understand 1/2 of what's written".


Senior Don Juan
Nov 19, 2019
Reaction score
Eye of the storm
Sooo, you're saying it's a hard skill, except for the parts that aren't? All you have is a structure, the exact details on how to execute every step in every situation is still an art.

Think of how to write a book or compose music. You can know the hard skill of how to structure it, but still severely lack the artistic skill necessary to fill the structure with good content. So it's technically correct, but nobody likes it.

It probably took you some time to write all of that, but while structure is necessary, there is no way around the art. It may come so naturally to you that you don't recognize just how creative you're really being, but sadly your post is worthless to the guys who aren't as imaginative as you.


Master Don Juan
Mar 15, 2016
Reaction score
“Do you have the time? I think my watch is running slow.”, “Do you know if there are any good specials here tonight? I'm getting tired of the same old xyz.”, “Do you know where the bathrooms are? I can't find them anywhere and my friend is about to make a mess!”
oh... gawd. *cringe*


"If you love women, you must read the SoSuave Guide to Women. It's fantastic!"