Kev07
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 2, 2006
- Messages
- 1,706
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So has anyone ever tried asking a fairly good looking girl to prom when you don't really know them well (IE: say hi every now and then and really small talk)
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
EdHunter said:I did this twice, and it's not as bad as you might think...I think the secret is partly not acting as though the whole "don't know well" thing is an issue. If you frame the approach in such a way that it seems natural that you'd ask her, then the whole thing will go much more smoothly---after all, you don't want her to ever be thinking "I don't know this guy, so why should I go w/ him."
As for the dates thing, I think it could go either way. It certainly could increase the comfort level, but you don't want her to get creeped out and feel you're coming on too strong too soon. At least, that's my thinking (and how I'm handling my own situation; cf. my thread on my own issue).