Kev07
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 2, 2006
- Messages
- 1,706
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- 9
So has anyone ever tried asking a fairly good looking girl to prom when you don't really know them well (IE: say hi every now and then and really small talk)
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
EdHunter said:I did this twice, and it's not as bad as you might think...I think the secret is partly not acting as though the whole "don't know well" thing is an issue. If you frame the approach in such a way that it seems natural that you'd ask her, then the whole thing will go much more smoothly---after all, you don't want her to ever be thinking "I don't know this guy, so why should I go w/ him."
As for the dates thing, I think it could go either way. It certainly could increase the comfort level, but you don't want her to get creeped out and feel you're coming on too strong too soon. At least, that's my thinking (and how I'm handling my own situation; cf. my thread on my own issue).