Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Anyone ever change her mind after she blew you off?

JST8828

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 28, 2013
Messages
57
Reaction score
10
Location
North Bergen, NJ
I'm talking specifically in the early stages of dating. First couple of dates. Just curious if anyone has any stories. Like maybe she seemed a bit uncertain when she blew you off or she told you something about you that made her think you guys weren't a great match, but after doing some leg work you were able to turn things around and get her out again, even if it were for a few more dates/sex, etc. Thanks.
 

FlexpertHamilton

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 10, 2020
Messages
2,246
Reaction score
2,708
Location
US
It's simply not worth it to pursue low interest women, even if you can turn them around. It's always better to start over with a new one.

I would make an exception if she was really hot and thought I could get an ez lay, but that's about it.
 

SargeMaximus

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 14, 2020
Messages
3,956
Reaction score
2,009
Age
36
Not exactly but I have experienced women take notice of me who hadn’t before.
after doing something or another
 

Bigpapa

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 17, 2020
Messages
3,193
Reaction score
2,491
Age
124
I'm talking specifically in the early stages of dating. First couple of dates. Just curious if anyone has any stories. Like maybe she seemed a bit uncertain when she blew you off or she told you something about you that made her think you guys weren't a great match, but after doing some leg work you were able to turn things around and get her out again, even if it were for a few more dates/sex, etc. Thanks.
depends on the reason . It is possible ,but unless she is amazing , it is not worth it as it is a lot of work
 

IKO69

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 23, 2005
Messages
1,222
Reaction score
1,121
Age
41
Location
Miami, FL
Many times but funnily enough a lot of times you move on and meet so many other women, better women, that you don't even see the point in revisiting what was in the past.

Life is about progression. Some people go up, other go down. As long as you keep going and don't remain still you shouldn't be surprised when you re-encounter people who will view you in a different light.
 

Black Widow Void

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 24, 2010
Messages
2,183
Reaction score
3,850
I’ve done this countless times with ex’s, but keep in mind that they’ve at some point been invested.

Reversing the attraction (to our favor) with someone new would be more difficult - they don’t have the familiarity or previous investment.

I suppose that if they were on the fence (when cutting thighs off) and now having second thoughts… there could be another chance. However, as other members have stated, it’s not high interest. And consequently, would likely be a waste of our time.
 

Scaramouche

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 27, 2008
Messages
3,753
Reaction score
929
Age
79
Location
Australia
Hi JST,
Yes I have done it by prostrating and apologising...sadly they treat you like Attila the Hun treated the Romans.shouting as he threw his sword in the scales "Voe vancis"...Woe to the conquered...Completely agree with Black Widow particularly during these Plague times but on reflection most of these charmers were blown off by me and half the time only conceded to hook ups
to humiliate and seek revenge for my previous transgressions,I suppose it boils down to how hard up you are...Good Luck.
 

Konada

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 28, 2011
Messages
1,233
Reaction score
648
Depends on her interest level and the reason she blew you off for.

If she blew you off because there is little/low interest, it will usually be a complete waste of your time even if she comes back.

However, if you feel that she has high interest but there might be some conflict of values, it can work out if you two manage to have an honest discussion of what it means for both of you.
 

The_Hand_Of_God

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 2, 2021
Messages
37
Reaction score
24
Age
33
The best move is to Next her after you detect low-interest or significant resistance.

Occasionally, in my experience, they re-evaluate you after you walk away. Your strength in walking away actually makes you more attractive to them. They key is you have to walk away and stay away. I've had girls contact me years later. No joke. They never forget it. But don't count on them coming back. It only happens sometimes and the timeline is unlimited. You might hear from her years later.
After not hearing off her for so long you usually get a... 'Hey you! What you been up too? X' message
 
Last edited:

Bigpapa

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 17, 2020
Messages
3,193
Reaction score
2,491
Age
124
Hi JST,
Yes I have done it by prostrating and apologising...sadly they treat you like Attila the Hun treated the Romans.shouting as he threw his sword in the scales "Voe vancis"...Woe to the conquered...Completely agree with Black Widow particularly during these Plague times but on reflection most of these charmers were blown off by me and half the time only conceded to hook ups
to humiliate and seek revenge for my previous transgressions,I suppose it boils down to how hard up you are...Good Luck.
women are big emotional bullies . Close to being sociopaths
 

Glassguy

Moderator
Joined
Apr 25, 2016
Messages
4,663
Reaction score
8,553
Age
46
If you are seriously blown off, there are 2 types of men and thus 2 reactions:

Beta males- she is only playing hard to get.

Alpha males- she isn't worth the hassle and I have 5 other women who are vying for my time and attention. Move on.

Now if this chick in question does in fact have higher interest (let's say 70%) and blew you off, one of 2 things will happen:

Beta male- she will not have to work for or invest in someone who eagerly stuck around after getting blown off and therefore, she will devalue the Beta male even more.

Alpha male- she will notice the withdraw of time and attention and actually go after him because he has boundaries, abundance and proves that he is higher value.

It's a win win scenario for the Alpha male/man with the right outlook and process on how to properly deal with a potentially low interest woman.

That's my take.
 

FlexpertHamilton

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 10, 2020
Messages
2,246
Reaction score
2,708
Location
US
Depends on her interest level and the reason she blew you off for.

If she blew you off because there is little/low interest, it will usually be a complete waste of your time even if she comes back.

However, if you feel that she has high interest but there might be some conflict of values, it can work out if you two manage to have an honest discussion of what it means for both of you.
Yes, this is true as well. Depends on what OP means by "blew you off". If it's a flake, or ghosting you for a while, or just general disinterest/toxicity/bitchiness/ungratefulness? Then no, its not worth it to pursue them.

I had a situation recently where I went on 2 dates with a girl and we had a great time, but she seemed to get the impression I was only looking for casual things and had some reservations. I had to explain to her that certain behaviors of mine are done to avoid rushing into things with new women (like giving them tons of space), and that I am in fact very open to long term stuff, even though it's explicitly on my "agenda". Probably still went a little heavy on the "pull" side of the pushpull, but you cannot just keep maintaining indifference/detachment indefinitely.
 
Last edited:

RBK

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 11, 2009
Messages
376
Reaction score
427
Age
40
Iron Rule of Tomassi #7

It is always time and effort better spent developing new, fresh, prospective women than it will ever be in attempting to reconstruct a failed relationship. Never root through the trash once the garbage has been dragged to the curb. You get messy, your neighbors see you do it, and what you thought was worth digging for is never as valuable as you thought it was.
 

ubercat

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 6, 2015
Messages
3,860
Reaction score
2,428
Location
Australia
its because they are physically weak. Emotional strength is all they’ve got. They have to manipulate to get their way. It’s the only way.
Generally yes. Not always. I have been playing tennis with a little Chinese girl for 7 years. She hits with her man he is probably a whole level above me in terms of ratings which is a big deal in tennis. And if I don't play smart she can hit me off the court.
 

ubercat

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 6, 2015
Messages
3,860
Reaction score
2,428
Location
Australia
Idk about this alpha beta stuff seems a bit cartoonish. There are trends in life for sure you don't want to swim against the tide. And it is useful to contrast behaviours but there's an awful lot of behaviour that lies between. I don't meet too many pure alphas or pure betas and it is situational.

I think spinning plates is the secret sauce. You just don't have time or energy to obsess about some chick and chicks aren't infallible with their radar many of them will take that accidental indifference as a sign of high value.
 

ubercat

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 6, 2015
Messages
3,860
Reaction score
2,428
Location
Australia
Chinese women aren't a good template, man. It's well known that Chinese people are grown in labs with gene altering tech and steroids and stuff.
Ok mate sure you go with your it is well-known from some tin.hat website. I will go with my experience of well over 10 years of dating Asian chicks. Got a couple of mates who have babies with their Asian wives kids are healthy and smart what more do you want. I've been with Eastern European women before in ltr they were good too. Latinas were uncommon unfortunately when I was on the scene there are a few around in Melbourne now.

If you have studied Chinese internal martial arts like I have you will know that a small person can output an immense amount of power if they know how to use their body weight properly. Power is rooted in the ground directed by the hips and manifested in the hands
 

ubercat

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 6, 2015
Messages
3,860
Reaction score
2,428
Location
Australia
I hoped so. But on SS you never can tell. But life is surprising I never thought I would say this but I sure miss trump looking at how Europe is.

He just would have had an all-night hookers and coke session with Putin at some bunga bunga party and the tanks would have gone home.
 

RobbyDog

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 7, 2021
Messages
194
Reaction score
238
Age
41
If you are seriously blown off, there are 2 types of men and thus 2 reactions:

Beta males- she is only playing hard to get.

Alpha males- she isn't worth the hassle and I have 5 other women who are vying for my time and attention. Move on.

Now if this chick in question does in fact have higher interest (let's say 70%) and blew you off, one of 2 things will happen:

Beta male- she will not have to work for or invest in someone who eagerly stuck around after getting blown off and therefore, she will devalue the Beta male even more.

Alpha male- she will notice the withdraw of time and attention and actually go after him because he has boundaries, abundance and proves that he is higher value.

It's a win win scenario for the Alpha male/man with the right outlook and process on how to properly deal with a potentially low interest woman.

That's my take.
This is right on the money. For years I’ve been in situations where I was confused about whether a chick was playing hard to get, or just low interest. So like a predictable AFC, I’d chase after them. Now, I don’t have time for this BS female behaviour…on to the next one. Life is just so much easier when you adopt the Alpha approach as mentioned—the process of walking away boosts a man’s self respect immensely.
 
Top