"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Another possible sh*t test

GS750

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So a girl I was seeing and I agreed to no contact. I have not seen her in a while but we have been in contact, mostly through text, and mostly initiated by her. She told me she's "pursuing" a relationship with someone. So I told her that's fine, but if we're not going to be seeing each other then there's no need for us to be in contact. She texted back "okay". So about four hours later she texts me: "I hope in your future relationships you are more open to expressing your feelings. I never got the feeling that you cared for me in any significant way". I suspect she is trying to bait me into spilling me guts...which I won't. I still have not responded to this text. Suggestions?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Sino Zane

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She's "pursuing a relationship with someone else," which may or may not be true.

She's either actually pursuing someone else or she's playing games. Either way, ignore her and move on. If she wanted you, she would express that fact instead of telling you that she's trying to pursue someone else.
 

VladPatton

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Yeah, I've gotten those aftermath texts. Just leave it alone. It's bait for you to text on and on and on through the mask of an argument. You just gotta stop the contacting, man. You're not doing anyone any good by keeping in contact with her. Why would you? To hear how she's blowing her new man? Pfft, delete her from all platforms, forget abut her, and be happy.
 

JohnnyStorm

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I think it's one of those that if you text back with "Great" or "Cool", she thinks she's won because you "aren't showing your feelings"....Go figure.

If you want to carry on the dialogue I'd respond with something like "Whatever feelings I had/have are irrelevant now as you're "pursuing a relationship with someone else" :)" or if you want to carry on with your life, ignore and delete.
 

Greasy Pig

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This is a perfect example of when to ignore. Plain and simple.
She's obviously baiting you into battle but by not offering battle, you've already won.
Any reply - whether it be aggressive, passive, nonchalant, dismissive, placatory or submissive - throws fuel on a fire that really needs water.
The cup of water you hold is silence. And it will drive her more insane than anything you say.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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GS750

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All good points. Thanks
 
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