"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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An interesting "seeing someone" question

spiderman1979

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Hi there! I'm new here. I hope I'm posting in the right location. Years ago I used to be a total AFC, but things have changed. Since I started lating dancing a few years ago and got better and better at it, I began having girlfriends on a serial basis. At the beginning I made mistakes (failed tests), but due to the pickup community I now understand the error of my ways.

Anyway, to the question: Last night I met a girl in a dancing club. She was new there, and didn't know how to dance. So I took on the role of the teacher, I noticed her interest level rising on and on, and then I said that I had to go and asked her if she had e-mail. She replied that she did, and gave it to me. Then I asked for her phone number, to which she replied "OK, but just for the record, I'm seeing somene right now". I whispered immediately in her ear in a conspirational tone: "You don't tell me about your problems, I don't tell you about mine, deal?". She smiled and asked whether I wanted her home number. I replied "certainly", got her number and ejected the scene.

Since I haven't been in ths situation before what, according to your experince, which is probably a lot bigger than mine, is my best course of action, especially if I call her (she might say that she isn't comfortable getting together right now because she's seeing someone but we can send each other mail. That could be dangerous because I don't want to enter the friendship zone. She really is something special and I want her).

Please help me.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Inquire

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seeing is not goin steady, by all means procede.
 

spiderman1979

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Sorry

I apologize for the spelling mistakes. I typed quickly. Note that I meant "latin dancing" "seeing someone".
Spiderman1979.

P.S. If you were girls, I wouldn't have apologized. I would have
busted your balls for needing corrections ...:)
But you are guys and I have the deepest respect for this forum.
 

Inquire

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Re: Sorry

Originally posted by spiderman1979
I apologize for the spelling mistakes. I typed quickly. Note that I meant "latin dancing" "seeing someone".
Spiderman1979.

.
so she is dancing wit someone else?

if so, dont be dancing with her but "dating" her. set ur own zone blah blah blah.
 

spiderman1979

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You seem to have misunderstood me

She is not dancing with someone else (actually in the club once I asked her to dance, she danced only with me for more than an hour before I ejected). She's seeing someone else as in "dating" him. Note that she didn't say that he was her boyfriend and note the way I answered her.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Inquire

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tats wut i thought the first time, go to my first post.

seeing someone is not goin steady wit them, by all means procede.
 
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