"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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An Idea on Approaching

Peacebewithyou

Don Juan
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Hey guys [and some gals],

I am considering approaching gals, building up their comfort level, and then giving them my number, while telling them "hey, [whatever their name is] you're pretty fun and cool, here's my number. text me and then we can continue the fun." Seems like a pretty good way to locate the gals who might have high interest from the gals with low interest. What are you thoughts and opinions on this specific approach?
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Uncharted

Master Don Juan
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Honestly I never do that. I always ask for their number. That way, you are always in charge. If you give them your number they have all the power (which you don't want).

The best thing I've started doing is giving her my cell phone and saying "put your number in my phone."
 

Plutoman

Senior Don Juan
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There's some merit in it, though, as a girl may give you her number if she's on the fence, so you waste time contacting her for no good reason at all. If you give her the power, if she makes the investment there's some definite interest, while if she doesn't, you aren't putting any time in it yourself.

So yeah, I see the value. You might win over some girls that are on the fence by taking control, but you save yourself time and effort by initially handing that off and taking control after they show investment and interest.

All I can say is - give it a shot, see if it works out better than asking for it yourself?
 

Alvafe

Master Don Juan
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well it didn't worked with me, they never call, only when they are really into you, or if they have another reason to call you from a cold aproach like that? don't see it happening. but you can try maybe you have luck :)
 

Darth

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Peacebewithyou said:
I am considering approaching gals, building up their comfort level, and then giving them my number, while telling them "hey, [whatever their name is] you're pretty fun and cool, here's my number. text me and then we can continue the fun."
Hmmm...
1. It sounds like a line ("continue the fun"- IDK man)
2. You don't have their number- leaves you at a loss if you are interested and she doesn't respond.
3. To me it goes against the whole male/female pursuer/pursued idea. It's not really female nature to initiate things. By doing this you are asking her to be so interested in you after a brief conversation as to do something that is fundamentally not their role
4. I don't text, find it inefficient and girly but that's just me
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

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