"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Aftermath of dancing

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adpreston1988

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Okay, so I just recently danced at a club Saturday night, which was really exciting since I'm only 17 and got in with a fake I.D. Anyways, I went with a group of guys and girls I know from high school and had a really fun time. There were two girls in particular that I really enjoyed dancing with. I just asked one of them earlier tonight if she plans on going again this upcoming Saturday since she's going on vacation next week. She told me that she might be able to and it just depends on how much packing she gets done. However, I haven't mentioned anything to the other girl.

I was wondering if it's best for me to say nothing to the other girl and hope I see her again next Saturdy night, let her bring up going again Saturday, or should I initiate it and ask her if she plans on going again Saturday? Also, should I ask either one of the girls if they enjoyed themselves at the club or will I just be putting myself in a bad situation?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Charm&Style

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yaa dont ask they other girl....

you dont want to come off needy. If you see her though(at the club)...dance with her....get her comfortable with you...then take her away from her friends...and then its all up to what your motives are

good luck bro
 
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adpreston1988

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Well this girl is one of my friends on facebook and so I contacted her via facebook since I don't have her phone number or aim screen name. This is how the conversation went:

Me- So are you planning on going to Necto again this weekend?
Her - hmm..i'm thinking no? lol. i dunno.

So as you can see, it definitely did not go well. Her response is kind of weird too. She did say, "I dunno" so there's still a chance she might go. Anyways, did I completely blow it with her? What should I have done differently and what can I do now to get her to come? I don't really know what to do now, because I didn't expect the reponse I got at all. I thought she enjoyed herself at the dance.
 
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adpreston1988

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I'm looking for any kind of advice here. Read the post directly above this one.
 
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LikRetsam

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She said no, and then dunno. Not yes and maybe/probably.

Frankly, you seriously should NOT care this much about a random chick.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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adpreston1988

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LikRetsam said:
She said no, and then dunno. Not yes and maybe/probably.

Frankly, you seriously should NOT care this much about a random chick.
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I know, but she isn't just a random chick. I went to high school and middle school with her. My one weakness is that I do tend to fall for girls fast and quickly, but it usually ends up tapering off. So I do seem pretty obsessed with her right now, but I'll probably forget about her in a week or so if nothing happens.

But you didn't really give me any advice either. You just basically told me what I already know.
 
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Charm&Style

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bro her "i dunno" is a "HELL NO LOSER" just in a nice way...

its a nite club...you dont need her around

dont waste your time becoming needy around them...right now they arent intrested in you and neither should you be interested in them.

go live life and have them wonder to you...if it happens
 
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adpreston1988

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I love how no one is responding to my post, besides Charm&Style and his advice isn't even helpful.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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LikRetsam

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You're an idiot.
 
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Skilla_Staz

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Alright. You need helpful advice? Heres the deal. You barely know these girls. You danced with them. Whoopdee do. The only thing you talk to them about is the club, and its basically a brief "Are you going?" This is extremely pointless.

Just go. Forget about her. YOu talk about falling for a girl quickly? It's because you focus on one girl. You're worried about her, and she probably doesn't even know your name. If she does, it's only because you've got it on facebook.

Just go to the club this weekend, do your thing. Get some numbers. Get some follow ups. Get some nookie.
 
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adpreston1988

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Skilla_Staz said:
Alright. You need helpful advice? Heres the deal. You barely know these girls. You danced with them. Whoopdee do. The only thing you talk to them about is the club, and its basically a brief "Are you going?" This is extremely pointless.

Just go. Forget about her. YOu talk about falling for a girl quickly? It's because you focus on one girl. You're worried about her, and she probably doesn't even know your name. If she does, it's only because you've got it on facebook.

Just go to the club this weekend, do your thing. Get some numbers. Get some follow ups. Get some nookie.
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Thanks for the advice, but you're wrong about me not knowing the girls at all. I've known them since middle school and I was just really surprised from the response of the one girl. That's probably why I'm focusing on her so much.
 
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