Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
I really dont believe that she is. She really wants to have sex, but has her very particular, semi-secret reasons for withholding. We all know that women will withhold sex when they have high interest in developing an LTR. Easy to understand. But she does not want an LTR with me, because I dont want kids and she does. SHe claims to be withholding because she likes to fantasize about the guy for a while, and get so worked up that she has to have him. This is great, but I feel she can fantasize and wait it out while I do something else - fvck other girls for example, rather than get frustrated from spending time making out with her etc. but not getting any further.The Bat said:Is she just a ****-tease?
Can't win 'em all. Move on, brother.
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
This is a good question and why I love Anti Dump's machine so much.Vendetta081789 said:You know. The problem I have always faced when next'ing a woman to win her is this:
When you win her back. What's to stop her from getting bored again? Do you really plan on playing cat and mouse for the rest of your life? No you don't. If she is playing games, and you are looking for a LTR, then this is not the approach for you.
This is how I have mostly operated. This girl is interested in me for who I am. But it is more complicated than that. That's why I was planning on giving it a rest.KontrollerX said:It basically nexts all the women not interested in you for you and your unique qualities and keeps those women who love you the way you are.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
That woman could stand to be taken down a notch or two!! If any girl said that to me, chances are I'd just get p*ssed and leave :trouble:. And she got away with saying all that other stuff too? That girl is a man-trap!!Dongfu said:"Aw, he's frustrated." She said this after I attempted to slightly escalate kino one night, and she shut me down. Can you believe that?
Good post. I agree completely. But just to clarify, the "break" would have been a non-emotional break. Not because I am over whelmed with emotion but just to deprive her of my company for a little while. I would still have seen her on occasion, but definitely without any physical stuff. I already did that for a couple days. Now that I am injured she IS stepping up - bringing me food and movies.BuckwildNYC said:Maybe it's just me but I dont think guys need "breaks". That really sounds like such a chick thing to say. Like you are sooo overwhelmed with emotion that u need to take a step back. I say just play it cool man. Freeze her out. Hang out with her but dont be all over her. Sorry to hear u are injured but this is a great opputunity. Let her step up to the plate. See how much she'll do for you. If she'll cook and clean and take care of you then what the hell would you need with a break?
She WILL come around, but the question is when? It could take months. I am juggling a couple others now, but I am still more interested in this one. Anyway thanks for the solid advice.BuckwildNYC said:Maybe she's not into casual sex.....alot of chicks think that giving a guy sex is like giving him her heart and soul. Just play it cool and she will come around. In the mean time juggle a couple chicks so u aren't only relying on her for sex. And if she never comes around then nothing gained nothing lost.
I was intentionally making an effort to not reveal frustration. She must have caught the slightest glimpse, and that was all she needed to reaffirm her position of control.mikeyb said:If any girl said that to me, chances are I'd just get p*ssed and leave :trouble:.
Thats my feeling, and the only reason I have hung in there. I usually have no interest in a GF, but she has all the qualifications to be a great one. Once I nail her, she will have no more power over me. That's just the natural order of things.mikeyb said:she'd probably make the ideal girlfriend.
Bro this is exactly how it is. Im just trying real hard not to **** it up if you know what i mean. I have spent so long being a guy who picks up a lot of women and now I dont know what to do with a relationship????Dongfu said:It has been quite a while since I have felt frustrated or average with women. Recently however, I have met my match. The female in question is extra ordinary. Aside from being extremely beautiful, she cooks amazing food, massages me all the time, buys me stuff, takes me places, is never *****y, never clingy, never puts any expectations on me, and on and on. She has almost every quality I look for in a woman.
Me neither. I have been pro-friends with benefits for a few years now. I intentionally avoid GF's, but now it suddenly I've met a GF worthy girl. More irony in my life.osu13 said:I have spent so long being a guy who picks up a lot of women and now I dont know what to do with a relationship????
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Great realization.DonGorgon said:The saddest p[art is that our inner AFC is prone to come out when we meat a woman that we really genuinely like .... it is instinctive to want to do nice stuff for her etc... so best bet is to go after girls you dont like that much...LOL