Absurdly caught up over "almost" cheating with this girl

[Ghostnutbuster]

Let me start this by saying I'm an amateur gamer, so even where I got was a pretty big step for me. Summer school college course (lasted a total of 5 weeks), damn fine looking 8, asked her out she says she has a boyfriend. Needless to say I cut contact and she keeps texting me at like midnight, almost every night. I tell her to cut it out if she is real about her boyfriend. Turns out she wasn't, because this goes on for weeks and in the last week of class shes sitting on my couch telling me, "I don't really care what happens between us," as in green light dude, go for it. Well, I couldn't do it. Something got the best of me and I bitched out - maybe the pity I felt for this cuck drained all the blood from my ****. Maybe I was nervous about initiating the first kiss. It just felt wrong. That day her BF calls her and evidently found out/bitches her out about her going to my place, she tells me this is in very short texts, and avoids talking to me the last day of class. I asked her to come over one night afterwards - no response. I texted her on the night of the final and essentially said, "hey, was fun, see you around" - no response. What is the reasoning for this? We both knew we didn't want a relationship, but why can't we at least be amicable about our leaving? This **** sucks, its like having sex right up until you are about to bust and then you just go home never to speak to that person again! I can't stop thinking about this **** either! We had some real deep conversations, and I could feel the chemistry building. Why wouldn't she just leave this chode and be guilt free about this casual hook up? She told me straight up multiple times she feels like this guy needs her more than she needs him. My mind is telling me this is horse**** and that I should be going out to hit on other girls, but my game has seriously deflated after this incident.

I need your help DJs. This thread is pathetic - it wasn't easy typing it. But its really interfering with my life right now. I need help dealing with "after-fling closure", learning from not being able to close a deal, and most of all dealing with this ghosting (do I pursue, do I say **** it, will she ever turn around on her own?)

 

[fastlife]

The only cure for feeling bad about not taking action when you had the opportunity is to take more action. Go out tonight and approach every attractive girl you see--whether they're in groups, with guys, doesn't matter. Even if you get shot down 100% of the time (you won't) just the very action of taking action will make you feel better and keep you from dwelling on a past you can't change.

 

[MrWood]

you didnt fvck her
she nexted you

 

[Von]

You had a chance.
You have morals or where too afraid to jump in for the kill

Now you know, with experience, you'll be quicker.

She forgot you even existed.
Now to next her and make yourself DJ

 

[Ghostnutbuster]

Sounds like nobody here is going for the "her boyfriend found out, and she is worried about jeopardizing her relationship, therefore lay off for now, but try again later"

more like

"you done ****ed up by not making a move, move on, find someone else"