"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
About moving.
- Thread starter cognac
- Start date
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
jophil28
Master Don Juan
Nah.cognac said:
As LMS would have said, "It's against the natural order of things."
BTW, Cognac, I thought that we were clear about this particular dilemma of yours. You posted a long version of this several weeks ago and you received several slabs of good advice.
Scaramouche
Master Don Juan
If you would like to try another City,and have equal prospects for finding work.then go for it,a change is as good as a holiday.But as I hear employment opportunities are scarce in the States at the moment,I suggest discretion....Women you lose, like Horses or Dogs that you love and lose,seem irreplaceable at the time,but it is surprising how soon you get over them...Just stay in touch with her,and start revving up a couple of the Plates you have been spinning....You have been spinning Plates,haven't you?
Kailex
Master Don Juan
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=171293
Because if it is... I hope you do move.
You know what... you should. Maybe then you'll learn the hard way.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
squirrels
Master Don Juan
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No.cognac said:
If that's your reason for moving, then the answer is no, absolutely not.
Put down the romance novels and think a little.
speed dawg
Master Don Juan
Only time I would ever even CONSIDER moving for a woman was if it was my wife, and it was a SUBSTANTIAL pay increase for her (as in, can't turn down money), as well as just a straight peachy move for me as well. I've known a few people who have done this.
Joe Stud
Master Don Juan
Julius_Seizeher
Master Don Juan
Three months after getting to Columbus, she dumps me and so began the loneliest, most miserable time of my life. I didn't know anybody there, and I had to move into a sh!thole apartment with a floor that crawled.
The moral of the story is, DON'T DO IT.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
wait_out
Master Don Juan
But you grew from the experience and became a stronger man, right?Julius_Seizeher said:
On the other hand perhaps it just sucked
speed dawg said:
At this point, I wouldn't move even for that. I'm building something here, either she can support me and help me or go after what she wants, but I'm never ever again putting my future plans on hold for another woman. I did that once and regretted it, hated myself for it and blamed her and resented her. It caused all sorts of problems. No, if we go our separate ways, even as husband and wife, so be it. Divorce is cheap but the years are long.