"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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A **** test that I screwed up

ninjahawk

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This girl is a close friend, and I'm trying to tap her, and here's the **** test I got in a nightclub when partying with her - "you can touch my boobs but you can't touch my face".

Somehow I got completely turned off by it and walked off.

But I regret it now, I should've played along!

Thoughts DJ's?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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oldmanofthesea

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If it’s a close friend you need to whip her up into sexual frustration first. You do that by rejecting her advances playfully. When she said that, you could have said, “You have boobs? I didn’t even notice, sis!” You treat her like she is asexual. This is not the approach you follow with a girl you just met and are trying to be romantic with but it can work well for a friend you are trying to escalate with. Just know that 99% of the time, you will never hook up with a girl you are close friends with unless there has been strong sexual tension between BOTH of you from the beginning but something external prevented both of you from doing anything about it (like one of you was in a relationship or you work together etc). Girls don’t generally go from platonic friends to lovers. It can happen but it’s among the rarest scenario out there. Likely she was just drunk and looking for attention and validation and would not have let you escalate.
 

Billtx49

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Never heard of a female setting pre escalation ground rules in a club unless you were telegraphing intent too early, but I would have viewed it as a green light to isolate and escalate. She may have only been thinking about her makeup.
It was a sexual comment from her though and you should have flipped it on her by saying something like, Never knew you were so focused on sex, but I can take care of that little problem for you …
 

ninjahawk

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I'm not gay, I've fallen in love with her unfortunately and if there's anyone I'd want to marry and have babies with - it's her
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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GioWolf

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I agree she was probably just worried about her makeup. She set a boundary while giving you the go ahead.
 

Blacksheep

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I'm not gay, I've fallen in love with her unfortunately and if there's anyone I'd want to marry and have babies with - it's her
You could have answered her: "Let's go to my house and let me touch ur boobs there!"

Also, this is kind weird... A women who said that in a party. Point 1: Did you ever think about yourself touching her boobs on a public place? What about her, haven't you ever questioned why a woman allow that kind of publicly behavior?

Trying to help you understand the whole situation. If you see a woman in a party having their boobs touched by a guy... what would you think about? What is she trying to prove or validate allowing that?

Another question: Why you felt in love with her? Can you describe me the qualities you saw in her? What behaviors make her a good potential mother for your sons?

If you can't answer that with clarity, you probably felt in love/attached with your sexual desire for her. Whenever you fck her enough... you will get tired and the dream is over.
 

andreihaha

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This girl is a close friend, and I'm trying to tap her, and here's the **** test I got in a nightclub when partying with her - "you can touch my boobs but you can't touch my face".

Somehow I got completely turned off by it and walked off.

But I regret it now, I should've played along!

Thoughts DJ's?
Her: "You can touch my boobs but you can't touch my face"
Me: "I don't want to...(pause) touch your boobs.
And then you grab her by the chin and kiss the sh1t out of her. One thing will lead to another and you end up somehow comming all over her face. While not touching her boobs even once. Cuz it would be poetic.
But that's just me.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Staticus

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I made friends with a girl like that one time and will never do it again. Keep women on the other end of the spectrum. Just a cause for disaster. IMO
 
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