"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

A kick in the a$$

Huffman

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 29, 2007
Messages
1,499
Reaction score
166
Hi Folks!

My situation is as follows: I've known this girl for a couple of months now (we live in the same house), seen her occasionally, got to know her a little.
I'm getting heavy signs of interest from her. I also recently dated her, though it was relaxed fun dates, so not specifically romantic.
She's not the only plate I'm spinning, but the most promising by far.

However, thus far I've been holding back a little because she's got a boyfriend. And I think she's not the type to cheat on him. Nevertheless, I need to reach a conclusion. For myself.

What I need is: to get my balls together and actually try to close her, so that I shall either have her, or I can at least set my mind to other things.

What you can do for me: give me a kick in the ass! I've wasted a couple of opportunities, but think it's not too late yet (actually it isn't as bad as it sounds). I had always waited for the perfect oppurtunity - which won't come.
I know it for myself. I know what I have to do. I have the resolve. But as soon as we're chitchatting or flirting away, I can't bring myself to do it anymore. I'm waiting for something that won't ever happen.
Help me get my balls out. Please?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

Mr. Wise

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 19, 2007
Messages
122
Reaction score
3
If I were you I'd keep doing what you're doing. Patience. Set a trap, attract her and let her fall in it. Let her come to you my man.
 

Mr. Wise

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 19, 2007
Messages
122
Reaction score
3
Huffman said:
What I need is: to get my balls together and actually try to close her, so that I shall either have her, or I can at least set my mind to other things.
What you need is: Self control IMO. She lives in the same house as you for crying out loud, she ain't going anywhere soon. Patience and control will land her but you have to make it her idea, not yours because if you get rejected, you have to see her face everyday.
 

Huffman

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 29, 2007
Messages
1,499
Reaction score
166
Thank you Mr. Wise.
You are, of course, correct - how could a girl you don't know very well be so important.
I feel myself reverting to AFC ways and losing my cool every now and then ;)
 

Huffman

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 29, 2007
Messages
1,499
Reaction score
166
Epilogue:

I did just that, kept my cool and set the trap - thank you again.
Just as I had assumed, she told me she would stay with her boyfriend. However, this doesn't come as a real failure to me, as she admitted she was "strangely very attracted" and very torn about what to do.

I could never have sparked that attraction without the lot of you - many thanks to sosuave.

Could it have worked? We will never know. I refused to attempt those "boyfriend destroyer" mindgames, as I believe this practice to be very spineless.

Time to move on. I didn't really expect it wo work out, but now I know I got the right stuff. It isn't really that hard.
Such a long way I've come since my AFC days.
This is to a brighter future!
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

j81

Don Juan
Joined
Sep 3, 2007
Messages
31
Reaction score
0
Huffman said:
Epilogue:

I did just that, kept my cool and set the trap - thank you again.
Just as I had assumed, she told me she would stay with her boyfriend. However, this doesn't come as a real failure to me, as she admitted she was "strangely very attracted" and very torn about what to do.

I could never have sparked that attraction without the lot of you - many thanks to sosuave.

Could it have worked? We will never know. I refused to attempt those "boyfriend destroyer" mindgames, as I believe this practice to be very spineless.

Time to move on. I didn't really expect it wo work out, but now I know I got the right stuff. It isn't really that hard.
Such a long way I've come since my AFC days.
This is to a brighter future!
To hell with her boyfriend.

I'm sure if roles were reversed he would try to take her from you, and might succeed. If I were you, I'd be all over that (in a non-AFC way that is), boyfriend or not.
 
Top