"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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A kick in the a$$

Huffman

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Hi Folks!

My situation is as follows: I've known this girl for a couple of months now (we live in the same house), seen her occasionally, got to know her a little.
I'm getting heavy signs of interest from her. I also recently dated her, though it was relaxed fun dates, so not specifically romantic.
She's not the only plate I'm spinning, but the most promising by far.

However, thus far I've been holding back a little because she's got a boyfriend. And I think she's not the type to cheat on him. Nevertheless, I need to reach a conclusion. For myself.

What I need is: to get my balls together and actually try to close her, so that I shall either have her, or I can at least set my mind to other things.

What you can do for me: give me a kick in the ass! I've wasted a couple of opportunities, but think it's not too late yet (actually it isn't as bad as it sounds). I had always waited for the perfect oppurtunity - which won't come.
I know it for myself. I know what I have to do. I have the resolve. But as soon as we're chitchatting or flirting away, I can't bring myself to do it anymore. I'm waiting for something that won't ever happen.
Help me get my balls out. Please?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Mr. Wise

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If I were you I'd keep doing what you're doing. Patience. Set a trap, attract her and let her fall in it. Let her come to you my man.
 

Mr. Wise

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Huffman said:
What I need is: to get my balls together and actually try to close her, so that I shall either have her, or I can at least set my mind to other things.
What you need is: Self control IMO. She lives in the same house as you for crying out loud, she ain't going anywhere soon. Patience and control will land her but you have to make it her idea, not yours because if you get rejected, you have to see her face everyday.
 

Huffman

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Thank you Mr. Wise.
You are, of course, correct - how could a girl you don't know very well be so important.
I feel myself reverting to AFC ways and losing my cool every now and then ;)
 

Huffman

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Epilogue:

I did just that, kept my cool and set the trap - thank you again.
Just as I had assumed, she told me she would stay with her boyfriend. However, this doesn't come as a real failure to me, as she admitted she was "strangely very attracted" and very torn about what to do.

I could never have sparked that attraction without the lot of you - many thanks to sosuave.

Could it have worked? We will never know. I refused to attempt those "boyfriend destroyer" mindgames, as I believe this practice to be very spineless.

Time to move on. I didn't really expect it wo work out, but now I know I got the right stuff. It isn't really that hard.
Such a long way I've come since my AFC days.
This is to a brighter future!
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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j81

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Huffman said:
Epilogue:

I did just that, kept my cool and set the trap - thank you again.
Just as I had assumed, she told me she would stay with her boyfriend. However, this doesn't come as a real failure to me, as she admitted she was "strangely very attracted" and very torn about what to do.

I could never have sparked that attraction without the lot of you - many thanks to sosuave.

Could it have worked? We will never know. I refused to attempt those "boyfriend destroyer" mindgames, as I believe this practice to be very spineless.

Time to move on. I didn't really expect it wo work out, but now I know I got the right stuff. It isn't really that hard.
Such a long way I've come since my AFC days.
This is to a brighter future!
To hell with her boyfriend.

I'm sure if roles were reversed he would try to take her from you, and might succeed. If I were you, I'd be all over that (in a non-AFC way that is), boyfriend or not.
 
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