I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
zekko said:Anybody want to try to make me feel good about that?
Lol.
Being 30 is definitely better than being 20 IMO.romangod said:I retired in my late 40s and life is a blast
I have found that women pursue me more now that I'm older, but I still don't think it happens as often as it shouldromangod said:Women are plentiful with the added luxury of firmly believing that I'm the prize. I don't pursue women, they pursue me.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Yup ^^squirrels said:At 50, you should be mature enough to know better than to feel down about being 50.
Just keep living.
At 50, you should be mature enough not to be hanging around on a pickup forumsquirrels said:At 50, you should be mature enough to know better than to feel down about being 50
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
What's the problem I was just saying hi, lol? If I'm interrupting this moment of epiphany (or grown folks time) I'ill just come back later, lol. All I can say is that I hope at 50 I have someone I can home to and they are still happy to see me.survivorman said:@jafyk,
Why you little...!!!
When you're young you think being 50 is about looking back. But when you're 50 you're concerned about getting on with your life.all I hope is I am alive at 50, "feel" wealthy when I look back and feel content about my life
Atom Smasher said:I find it interesting that I've noticed in the past couple of years that the young whippersnappers here on SS (and I definitely say that affectionately) are showing a lot more respect and are valuing our advice much more highly.
I'm not sure why that is, but it's good to see. When I was younger (heck, I'm still young AFAIC), I always looked to older folks for their wisdom. Maybe they would sometimes seem a little crotchety and eccentric, but I knew enough to eat the meat of their wisdom and spit out the bones.
I'd love to write more, but I've got to go and change my "Depends".
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.