"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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20/20 Hindsight

Wilko

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Nope, not another story about oneitis or lousy filtering.

Nah, I just thought it would be fun to look back and laugh at some of the ideas that have fallen in and out of favour on SoSuave over the last ten years (how old is the forum anyway?).

Three strikes: This was huge around 2006 - 2010 from memory. A girl was allowed three major breaches of dating etiquette (flaking, showing up late, disrespect) before you hard-nexted her.... THREE!!! That seems absurdly generous, because it is. Man, the grief you used to catch on the forum for nexting too early!

Every guy needs to learn salsa!: Last seen around 2010? I guess it was well-intentioned and it did have some merits - good ratios, learn how to lead women, etc. But in the end it was a niche activity that went briefly mainstream (the great salsa bubble of the mid 2000s) and now there's a distinct whiff of desperation about it. No genuine interest in dancing? Bah, congruency and authenticity don't matter! (except for the other 99% of the time we're preaching about it).

Entrepreneurship: In 2010 the perfect DJ was a salsa-dancing, independent small-businessman... I just threw up in my mouth a little bit. Is starting and running your own business a noble goal - you betcha. Is it a realistic, or even advisable goal for the majority - nope.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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ubercat

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Heheh great thread. I remember all of these stupidities. Over in Australia the new entrepreneurship cult is startup. Most startups come from people already working in an industry who saw an need not from jerks attending prayer Hall style meetings.
 

devilkingx2

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you don't want to next too early, but taking more abuse than you have to isn't good either

isn't salsa dancing still fun?

what's wrong with entrepreneurship?
 

ubercat

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Nothing wrong with any of the above. If it's right for you. Nexting is a complex topic. I d next very casually on a first date. Six months in I d give chances. You have to train puppies.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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