"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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10 things NEVER to say to a woman

JAS760

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Colossus dude your sig is so ****/ing hilarious!
oh and nice post, lots of info
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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K.Pez

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Never say: "Obviously I am more attracted to you than you are to me"

One of my buddies said this to a girl he was trying to get with and my jaw dropped. This is an instant deal breaker.
 

Colossus

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I agree with Espi.

Best to not beat around the bush and be direct about this very serious personal principle.

Timing is everything, however. I wouldn't drop this bomb in the first few dates...I might be a little more diplomatic about it. In other words, you don't have to lie, but say something along the lines of "well I'm not convinced marriage is right for me just yet. I'm very happy with my life now and I'd like to let things unfold." This way, you aren't coming off as a "commitment-phobe" and you aren't being dishonest. Later on, if you get more comfortable with each other, you can be more succinct with your opinions.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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nismo-4

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Nutz said:
0. "I like you."


No single phrase will destroy a woman's attraction for a man better than this one.
Wrong. Try "I love you dearly!"

Men ain't supposed to say I love you, men are supposed to say I love you TOO!
 
E

Energizer

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f283000 said:
here is 1 more

NEVER SAY YOU DON'T BELIEVE IN MARRIAGE:
It's fine if you don't and it's ok if you say this to your buddies, just don't ever say this where women might hear you. Try to keep this little belief of yours to yourself for your own good.
Does that count for "not believing in love?", "Not wanting children?", "Only being in a relationship for sex?" and last and by no means least "wanting to maintain a bachleor lifestyle?". If so, then that's explains all of my problems.

But then women say they want honesty and of course these pieces of vagiseal clearly don't want honesty, they want lies, abuse, hatred and venom because they are more than likely mental.
 

Blusher

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Originally Posted by Energizer
Does that count for "not believing in love?", "Not wanting children?", "Only being in a relationship for sex?" and last and by no means least "wanting to maintain a bachleor lifestyle?". If so, then that's explains all of my problems.

YES...it counts for "not believing in love"!!!

When it comes to love, you need not believe the hype...for some reason, people in western society choose to remain blind, thinking love is "the reason" for living, that love makes their world go 'round...well, it ain't!

CASH makes the world go 'round baby...

The simple truth is, love doesn't matter that much.
Say you've diagnosed with cancer and underwent surgery.

Then all the money in the world will not make up for this frustration of seeing this other guy on the ward getting daily visits from the woman that loves and supports him.

You'll just be rambling to yourself and cursing the day you were born.

As a matter of fact, you wouldn't even talk about it the way you do had you ever been truly loved by anyone. I doubt that would happen in the near future either since hatred and cynism only breeds more hatred.
 

Darth

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Espi said:
LOVE is a hyperbole, a post-modern myth...money isn't everything, but it's the key to happiness...

Money is the key to happiness?

I feel bad for you man.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Blusher

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Originally Posted by Energizer
Does that count for "not believing in love?", "Not wanting children?", "Only being in a relationship for sex?" and last and by no means least "wanting to maintain a bachleor lifestyle?". If so, then that's explains all of my problems.

YES...it counts for "not believing in love"!!!

When it comes to love, you need not believe the hype...for some reason, people in western society choose to remain blind, thinking love is "the reason" for living, that love makes their world go 'round...well, it ain't!

CASH makes the world go 'round baby...

The simple truth is, love doesn't matter that much.
Say you've diagnosed with cancer and underwent surgery.

Then all the money in the world will not make up for this frustration of seeing this other guy on the ward getting daily visits from the woman that loves and supports him.

You'll just be rambling to yourself and cursing the day you were born.

As a matter of fact, you wouldn't even talk about it the way you do had you ever been truly loved by anyone. I doubt that would happen in the near future either since hatred and cynism only breeds more hatred.
 

kingy

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you can say;

I like you

or

I love you

anytime after sex. if you are cool enough guy then it wont make a jott of difference. if you arent rock solid tho, its usually best to let the girl escalate the level of intimacy between you
 

Blusher

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Your girlfriend may LOVE you...but she LOVES MONEY, too. If you lose your job...you lose money...and then you lose your GF...or your wife...and you may love her to death...but if you're broke...you lose her.
Someone that loves you sticks with you through the hard times and supports you.

My parents have been together for 40 years and none of them bailed out when things weren't rosy financially or heathwise.

Otherwise, what's the relationship worth?
 

Don Israel

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Never say: hey! we should do something?! ( just say: whenever we're both free, let's blah blah .....)
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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bigjohnson

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Espi said:
... remember this: 50 per cent of marraiges end in divorce...and the men who are able to stay married probably cheat on their wives...and most men that I know are miserable being married...
It's close to 60% now, with (IIRC) the vast majority initiated by women. The good news is that if you drill into the data, the majority of 1st marriages actually stay married still. So wait until you're sure and pick a woman who's young and always been single, if you must propose.

Also, only 20% of marriages by American men to foreign women end in divorce. Food for thought.
 

nismo-4

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Damn, this is Diamond!

Thanks for bringing me into the new decade with this!
 

NYKfan0303

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About saying I love you.....
My girlfriend said I love you to me last night, and I was pretty drunk and didn't know what to say, so I said I love you too. Haha now nothing has changed, and she's still sooo into me, but what if she says it again? Any advice on how to handle that?
 

SamMalone

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Agree with most of this but #8 is wrong. It's good in theory, but once you guys actually get into a relationship, you'll see its for the best to lay down the rules on guy friends.

I've tried ignoring the guy friends and not being "insecure" and it doesn't work. Too many problems that way. Again I can see where the theory would come from but it doesn't translate into real dating.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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