mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
Right he should a changed that to drink at one of their places and frame it around sex.
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
1 week in No Contact and then contact- advice needed
- Thread starter arathorngr
- Start date
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
arathorngr
Don Juan
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If she wants a relationship again she will not put up at this first post breakup date.
I wont make a big deal out of it if she doesn't.
Of course i will make my advances nevertheless.
After this date communication is key. If she is joyfull and flirty i'm back and we may have a proper chance.
I remind you that she is 36, not a 22 yo looking for just sex. Somewhere in her head there is family, kids etc.
I must prove that i can be a stable loving man not only a sexy one that aroused her with his NC and nonchalance.
Balance is key now and i must think clearly.
Am i wrong?
I wont make a big deal out of it if she doesn't.
Of course i will make my advances nevertheless.
After this date communication is key. If she is joyfull and flirty i'm back and we may have a proper chance.
I remind you that she is 36, not a 22 yo looking for just sex. Somewhere in her head there is family, kids etc.
I must prove that i can be a stable loving man not only a sexy one that aroused her with his NC and nonchalance.
Balance is key now and i must think clearly.
Am i wrong?
arathorngr
Don Juan
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Well, yes. Multiple times
Malcontent
Senior Don Juan
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Maybe it's part of being older and more jaded, but when someone shows me once that they don't value what I offer, we're done. There's no guessing, no hoop jumping.
arathorngr
Don Juan
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Let's see how it goes today. I'm sure that she will do some explaining, even if i don't steer the conversation to what exactly happened.
My intent is to keep it lighthearted and fun, nothing too serious or "pushy".
Of course i will kiss close and try to bed her- friend zone is not accepted.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Just say " was too busy saving the world to answer. What's up?"
If she trys small talk. Ignore her. If she wants to talk serious like fixing things with you, if you want to get back together with her, the ball is now in your court. If you dont the just tell her you have too much going on in your life and you will get back to her....on your schedule....if you have time.
arathorngr
Don Juan
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UPDATE
Last night we had our first post breakup date. She was a bit nervous, but in a couple of minutes she became the woman i used to remember, when all things were good between us.
We had a few beers, we laughed, we kissed. Heavy kino, we both became rather sexual.
I chose not to be indifferent, i clearly showed to her that i like her as a woman but i also listened about her daily routines, her problems, etc. etc. Not anything heavy, I did not steer the conversation to "us", but she kept mentioning things we did together in the past and things that she would like to do again.
She was on her period (it's not a lie), sex was not an option that day. I don't mind, i can wait some days.
We parted in a very good mood, she told me to call her to meet again whenever i want to. "Next time it will be at my place and you will come", I said. She agreed saying "of course i will"
Today she sent me a goodmorning text, i replied in the same manner.
Ball is in my court now, I guess. I will keep things light and simple and see how it goes.
She knows that she has no option to flake again.
What do you think?
Last night we had our first post breakup date. She was a bit nervous, but in a couple of minutes she became the woman i used to remember, when all things were good between us.
We had a few beers, we laughed, we kissed. Heavy kino, we both became rather sexual.
I chose not to be indifferent, i clearly showed to her that i like her as a woman but i also listened about her daily routines, her problems, etc. etc. Not anything heavy, I did not steer the conversation to "us", but she kept mentioning things we did together in the past and things that she would like to do again.
She was on her period (it's not a lie), sex was not an option that day. I don't mind, i can wait some days.
We parted in a very good mood, she told me to call her to meet again whenever i want to. "Next time it will be at my place and you will come", I said. She agreed saying "of course i will"
Today she sent me a goodmorning text, i replied in the same manner.
Ball is in my court now, I guess. I will keep things light and simple and see how it goes.
She knows that she has no option to flake again.
What do you think?
arathorngr
Don Juan
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Read my last post. We went out yesterday.
arathorngr
Don Juan
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So you disagree with the way i handled the whole situation?
arathorngr
Don Juan
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Talked again. Date set for today, my place for drinks and -of course- sex.
Managed to turn around this one, for now.
FWB status seems pretty feasible, don't know about LTR or stability yet. She'll have to make me trust her again.
Managed to turn around this one, for now.
FWB status seems pretty feasible, don't know about LTR or stability yet. She'll have to make me trust her again.
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.