"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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1 week in No Contact and then contact- advice needed

arathorngr

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Beautiful girl, 36 yo.
Hit it off for 3 months, smooth sailing till 2 weeks ago when she became distant.
Chased (a bit), we finally broke up (her choice, she said too many things happen in her life and all this crap)
I agreed, said "ok, call me if you ever want to" and went NC.

Yesterday she SMSed me. Did not respond.
She sent another text saying that my non response is rude.
Did not respond to that too.

How to play it from here?
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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taiyuu_otoko

Master Don Juan
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How to play it from here?
Try some honesty.

"You said you wanted to break up, so I respected that. If you want to start dating again, that's fine, I'll give it a go. But I can't be friends with somebody I'm emotionally and sexually attracted to, because it makes it much harder for me to move on and try and find a more compatible relationship. So do you want to start dating again, or not?"
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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arathorngr

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I feel she tries to string me along.
Sex would be fine but i want the whole thing.
I think that if i just sex her, i will gain nothing in the big scheme of things.
 

arathorngr

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Part of me worries that by not responding i may appear bitter and butthurt...
 

guru1000

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While gaming, never explicate, manipulate.

And in post-breakup exchanges, X 2.
 

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
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Beautiful girl, 36 yo.
Hit it off for 3 months, smooth sailing till 2 weeks ago when she became distant.
Chased (a bit), we finally broke up (her choice, she said too many things happen in her life and all this crap)
I agreed, said "ok, call me if you ever want to" and went NC.

Yesterday she SMSed me. Did not respond.
She sent another text saying that my non response is rude.
Did not respond to that too.

How to play it from here?
Don't play. "Hi its good to see you reaching out. Contact me the next time you want to hang out. Otherwise I'm busy.". Don't say anything else unless she's trying to arrange a meeting.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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arathorngr

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I will not respond or make contact till she breaks, eg. says something like "i made a mistake" etc.
This is my decision.
 

arathorngr

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She SMSed again, at 5 in the morning
"This it it? You will not talk to me ever again?"


Weird
 

Billtx49

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If she sent that 5 a.m., she's thinking about you really hard in a major way right now. If she sleeps normal hours and its soon after she wakes up, or earlier than usual. What that means for you is anyone's guess, but her hamster is running at full speed right now.
 
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mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
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If she sent that 5 a.m., she's thinking about you really hard in a major way right now. If she sleeps normal hours and its soon after she wakes up, or earlier than usual. What that means for you is anyone's guess, but her hamster is running at full speed right now.
Work the hampster
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Scaramouche

Master Don Juan
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Dear Arathothorne,
All the above are on the money...No contact is just that,but take care,this one is not going to let go easily!
 

arathorngr

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UPDATE
She called. Three times in a row. Did not answer.
She insisted after one hour. I picked up. I was nonchalant, she was flirty.
She proposed to go for drinks tomorrow night.
I accepted. I could be more reluctant, but i chose not to play hard ball again.

Seems that there is still some interest here. Let's see how it goes tomorrow guys.
I intent to f#ck close of course.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

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