When a woman says "we can go out as friends"

[Mike32ct]

If you’re the “abundance guy” with 10 chicks lined up, then maybe it’s not necessarily worth your time.

But for most guys, an opportunity to even hang out with a hot chick is usually worth it. Even if you get friendzoned worst-case, it’s more practice being comfortable and chill around a hot chick, which is great.

 

[Ricky]

If you’re the “abundance guy” with 10 chicks lined up, then maybe it’s not necessarily worth your time.

But for most guys, an opportunity to even hang out with a hot chick is usually worth it. Even if you get friendzoned worst-case, it’s more practice being comfortable and chill around a hot chick, which is great.

Yeah i was thinking he could use it as social proof at least. Sometimes also less commonly, hot women will set you up with friends if they like to play matchmaker

 

[Mazer]

Two options: cancel the lunch date a day or two before, tell her something came up or go to lunch and lots of kino. Good luck

 

[The Diver]

oh hey I'd like to take you to lunch as a thanks for training me."

In Alan Rogers-Currie's book Mode One, he divided men's interaction with women into 4 modes :
Mode One - the rarest to Mode Four the extreme negative.
Your approach with this woman is very much described as Mode Two and with some of Mode Three - "I just want to be your friend")

""Mode Two:
Men who are saying what women want and expect to hear.
This man, although confident, is a man who wants to leave a good impression on women. This is the man who is overly concerned with getting women to like him and, therefore, will compliment women excessively and will be careful not to offend or challenge women. These men are timid, careful, afraid of criticism, too cautious, and indirect in their expression of their needs, wants, and desires.
They eventually tell women what they want and desire, but only after they are sure they are liked and won't be criticised; sometimes it's too slow and therefore can be too late, which will land them in the friend zone.
This is the type of conversation most women want to hear ( it's cartful, not intimidating, not challenging, and the compliments are a boost to their ego , but mostly because it'll leave them with the option to manipulate men), and that's what most women expect to hear because this is the conversational style of the vast majority of men. ( The simps)""
------
Go for it if you REALLY want to be her friend ONLY, but it reeks of simp if you're aiming for a romantic relationship/ connections of any kind, but pretend you only want to be her friend, and she knows it.

Stop playing games, be direct, confident , fearless.
As Atom Smasher used to say: stop playing the game - BE the game.

 

[BadBoy89]

This is the type of conversation most women want to hear ( it's cartful, not intimidating, not challenging, and the compliments are a boost to their ego , but mostly because it'll leave them with the option to manipulate men), and that's what most women expect to hear because this is the conversational style of the vast majority of men. ( The simps)""

Go for it if you REALLY want to be her friend ONLY, but it reeks of simp if you're aiming for a romantic relationship/ connections of any kind, but pretend you only want to be her friend, and she knows it.

Stop playing games, be direct, confident , fearless.

In theory you or whoever Alan Roger Currie is right.

The problem with this theory is, it applies to women who are below or the same as the man in SMV. This trainer was above me. She had movie star looks. If I was direct with her, she would have said "go to hell" is 2 seconds. Had to go Mode 2, otherwise wouldn't have even got her out alone.

Now if the women was older or a single mother or not good looking, yes, THEN the man be direct, ruthless, and destroy her because she has no leverage. But if the woman is hot and in her 20s and never married, no kids, layman on Sosuave can't afford be direct, they will get shut down like crazy.

 

[The Diver]

In theory you or whoever Alan Roger Currie is right.

The problem with this theory is, it applies to women who are below or the same as the man in SMV. This trainer was above me. She had movie star looks. If I was direct with her, she would have said "go to hell" is 2 seconds. Had to go Mode 2, otherwise wouldn't have even got her out alone.

Now if the women was older or a single mother or not good looking, yes, THEN the man be direct, ruthless, and destroy her because she has no leverage. But if the woman is hot and in her 20s and never married, no kids, layman on Sosuave can't afford be direct, they will get shut down like crazy.

I didn't suggest you tell her you want to f--k her, but to be direct and clear about your romantic intention with her by rejecting her offer for "only as a friend".
By saying you only want to be her friend, as she offers you, you used a female manipulative tactic to get what they want, and in your case, to have se-x with her by pretending you "only want to be a friend".

She is not stupid, she knows you want to F--k her , and that you use this approach like millions before you, and in her mind you are just " another one of those guys".

Your mindset is backwards:
If you had rejected her offer, you would convey to her that you know what you want, you're confident about it, and you're not interested in anything else other than that (a romantic connection.)
That way, at least you'll earn respect from her by showing balls and by going after what you really want, and maybe your chance with her would even be higher once she acknowledges you're not like other simp who hides behind the " just want to be a friend" mantra.

You, as well, will feel much better if rejected, after showing balls and confidant going after what you really
want.

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

If I was direct with her, she would have said "go to hell" is 2 seconds.

Then you weren't of high interest to her.

If you are highly interested in buying a Ferrari, and someone says "I have a Ferrari for sale", would your response be "Go to hell"?

No.

Instead, the person will have your attention.

It's the same shiit with women.

Had to go Mode 2, otherwise wouldn't have even got her out alone.

Then you were being manipulative.

Mode One is about honesty.

If you can't get to where you want to go with the woman by being honest, then even if you sleep with her, you still took an L.

But if the woman is hot and in her 20s and never married, no kids, layman on Sosuave can't afford be direct, they will get shut down like crazy.

Classic example of putting women on a pedestal.

Beta mentality.

Tsk, tsk.

Shame on you, son.

 

[plumber]

this is an accounting activity. look at all the things you have available to do at the same time as visiting with this girl. look at what things you want or need. do you need more sex, do you need more friends (its good to have friends...), do you need more money.. what is it that you really want or need. then spend your time in the way that gets your goals done.

don't be one way/one dimension. you don't have to simp to be friends with her. maybe she is a good wing.... if she is hot she might have contacts that result in more business.... or better job....

in short if you have nothing more pressing find out if there is value.

just triage your time.

I agree with the others... she does not see you as her best option for romance.

 

[Bokanovsky]

Agreed, it is a SUPER insult.

It's the equivalent of a man saying to a woman: we could fvck, but I could never be seen with you in public.

 

[Sega Genesis]

SG's $.02 fwiw....

I've gone out with men as "friends" and ended up falling hard for him during the date!

My first boyfriend and I started as friends, went out one night, fell hard for each and ended up dating four years!

I recall it well! It was while we were dancing and suddenly without warning I felt this overwhelming feeling in my solar plexis lol and kissed him!

The rest was history for four years.

Guys, I think it would be helpful if some of y'all could be an attractive woman for two minutes and experience what we do.

There is so much pressure placed on us by "overly thirsty" guys hitting on us, making sexual remarks, sometimes pawing us which used to happen to me at clubs when I went, wanting immediate sex; it is utterly refreshing to go out as "friends" with NO agenda and see what develops during the date!

I agree that sometimes it means she has NO interest in anything sexual or romantic but it's never so black and white to say this is always the case.

It's nuanced like everything else in life.

It may be her way of assuring it will be a low pressure date with no expectations and allowing things to develop naturally and organically.

Pay attention to her actions, gestures and how you're vibing during the date and make your decision whether to escalate and pursue further or not.

 

[BadBoy89]

I didn't suggest you tell her you want to f--k her, but to be direct and clear about your romantic intention with her by rejecting her offer for "only as a friend".
By saying you only want to be her friend, as she offers you, you used a female manipulative tactic to get what they want, and in your case, to have se-x with her by pretending you "only want to be a friend".

So Sosuave is saying a man should take a woman’s words very seriously. So, if a woman, on a 3rd or 4th date, during dinner at a nice restaurant, tells the man “we are not having sex tonight.” Date over and the man should immediately take her back to her place and say “goodbye”

Take a woman's words seriously, right?

She is not stupid, she knows you want to F--k her , and that you use this approach like millions before you, and in her mind you are just " another one of those guys".

I don’t know about that . That seems like an assumption.

Your mindset is backwards:
If you had rejected her offer, you would convey to her that you know what you want, you're confident about it, and you're not interested in anything else other than that (a romantic connection.)
That way, at least you'll earn respect from her by showing balls and by going after what you really want, and maybe your chance with her would even be higher once she acknowledges you're not like other simp who hides behind the " just want to be a friend" mantra.

You, as well, will feel much better if rejected, after showing balls and confidant going after what you really
want.

OK, so Sosuave is a saying "a hot girl in her 20s will respect a man more if he's alone on a Friday night because he got shot down hard, rather than going with the flow and taking it easy, and being 1 on 1 alone with her for 2 hours"

I'd rather tell people I was with a hot girl on Friday night.

Again if she was a single mother or in her 30s or ugly or older or overweight, then yes, I would agree with you. But when a girl is hot and in her 20s, she has leverage. I don't think the layman on Sosuave have enough power to say "sex or get out of my face"

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

It's the equivalent of a man saying to a woman: we could fvck, but I could never be seen with you in public.

If a woman says that to me, I'm fine with that arrangement.

 

[BadBoy89]

Then you weren't of high interest to her.

The goal was to get out alone 1 on 1. It wasn't for her to take off clothes in 2 min.

If you are highly interested in buying a Ferrari, and someone says "I have a Ferrari for sale", would your response be "Go to hell"?

No.

Instead, the person will have your attention.

It's the same shiit with women.

That's completely different. One is "you have the money, I have the goods"

The other a emotional and physical connection between a man and woman.

You guys must all be 6'1 Alpha dogs. It seems like anything other than a hot girl saying "I am so in love with you, why haven't you fu--ked me yet?" is a loss.

Then you were being manipulative.

Mode One is about honesty.

If you can't get to where you want to go with the woman by being honest, then even if you sleep with her, you still took an L.

What the hell does honesty have to do with it? You guys are all Church members now?

So Sosuave is saying "Be honest. Because you know, when are 48 and single with no wife and kids, you can tell your married friends, I didn't get the girl or have sex with her or get married or have kids, but at least I was honest and took the W"

Whatever helps you sleep at night I guess.

Classic example of putting women on a pedestal.

Beta mentality.

Tsk, tsk.

Shame on you, son.

I forget, the layman on Sosuave have higher standards than the richest and most powerful men in the world.

There was another thread where people said "Sydney Sweeney is a 5/10, so overrated." The layman on Sosuave likely don't have money or jobs, but their standards are high when it comes to having sex with hot women!

 

[Prepostereax]

You risk putting yourself orbit of her

 

[Sega Genesis]

You risk putting yourself orbit of her

I agree it's a risk but so is being sexually direct (as discussed) or just asking her out on a date! It's all a risk, no guarantees ever.

I just posted about this but my ex and I went out as "friends" and I fell hard for him that night! I actually kissed him first! We were together four years after that night.

My suggestion is accept her offer to go out as friends and see what develops naturally and organically.

If nothing's happening during the date and she still wants you only as a friend, tell her you have enough friends and move on.

There is no law stating you must remain in her friendship orbit.

$.02

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

The goal was to get out alone 1 on 1. It wasn't for her to take off clothes in 2 min.

Why spend time with her alone, if you don't know whether she has sexual desire towards you?

Ass-backwards.

That's completely different. One is "you have the money, I have the goods"

What?

The other a emotional and physical connection between a man and woman.

I agree.

Just as long as these things are according to your (the man) program.

Not hers, or theirs.

You guys must all be 6'1 Alpha dogs. It seems like anything other than a hot girl saying "I am so in love with you, why haven't you fu--ked me yet?" is a loss.

I'm a 6'3 Apex Predator.

And it is a loss, if your dating life is based upon following the lead of the woman, and going with the flow of her program and not your own.

What the hell does honesty have to do with it? You guys are all Church members now?

So Sosuave is saying "Be honest. Because you know, when are 48 and single with no wife and kids, you can tell your married friends, I didn't get the girl or have sex with her or get married or have kids, but at least I was honest and took the W"

Whatever helps you sleep at night I guess

Honesty have to do with a lot...only if you are a man of honor and integrity.

But if you ain't a man of honor and integrity..and you'd rather be dishonest and manipulate women to get what you want (Mode Three), then by all means, do yo thang.

Many men have been serious hurt/injured, and in rare cases killed, because of being dishonest to the wrong woman.

But hey, do yo thang tho.

Get your lie on .

I forget, the layman on Sosuave have higher standards than the richest and most powerful men in the world.

There was another thread where people said "Sydney Sweeney is a 5/10, so overrated." The layman on Sosuave likely don't have money or jobs, but their standards are high when it comes to having sex with hot women!

I don't see the correlation, but hey.

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

SG's $.02 fwiw....

I've gone out with men as "friends" and ended up falling hard for him during the date!

It can happen.

But it is a gamble and a risk that many men have taken L's from.

My first boyfriend and I started as friends, went out one night, fell hard for each and ended up dating four years!

If the goal of both parties was to find a long-term partners, then obviously, you must date each other.

But I'm talking about guys who don't don't want long-term commitments, but still want the puzzy.

I'm gonna say it slow for you, SG..because you don't seem to be comprehending.

A man

still wants

to fuk you.

Regardless of

how well

you two

know each other.

He doesn't care

if he just met you.

He doesn't care

about non-sexual chemistry

or rapport.

He still wants

to fuk you.

Ok?? Got it??

Do you understand now? Do I need to say it slower?

I recall it well! It was while we were dancing and suddenly without warning I felt this overwhelming feeling in my solar plexis lol and kissed him!

The rest was history for four years.

That's what's up .

Guys, I think it would be helpful if some of y'all could be an attractive woman for two minutes and experience what we do.

There is so much pressure placed on us by "overly thirsty" guys hitting on us, making sexual remarks, sometimes pawing us which used to happen to me at clubs when I went, wanting immediate sex; it is utterly refreshing to go out as "friends" with NO agenda and see what develops during the date!

Yeah, and it refreshing for us men to be able to bang a chick, get our nut off,

I agree that sometimes it means she has NO interest in anything sexual or romantic but it's never so black and white to say this is always the case.

It's nuanced like everything else in life.

It may be her way of assuring it will be a low pressure date with no expectations and allowing things to develop naturally and organically.

Pay attention to her actions, gestures and how you're vibing during the date and make your decision whether to escalate and pursue further or not.

No dates until sex or intimate physical contact has come into fruition.

 

[Bokanovsky]

If a woman says that to me, I'm fine with that arrangement.

Except you’re not a woman. Presumably.

 

[Sega Genesis]

I'm gonna say it slow for you, SG..because you don't seem to be comprehending.

A man

still wants

to fuk you.

Regardless of

how well

you two

know each other.

He doesn't care

if he just met you.

He doesn't care

about non-sexual chemistry

or rapport.

He still wants

to fuk you.

Ok?? Got it??

Do you understand now? Do I need to say it slower?

^^There was/is no need to be rude and condescending to me Venom. I have always understood this and it was never my issue when discussing Mode One "Hardcore" with you.

Got it?

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

Except you’re not a woman.

But the women I've had those experiences with, are.

Presumably.

Says the guy wit the androgynous-ass profile pic.