How can we tell if she's flirting because she's interested or just wants validation?

[tesla8520]

We know women flirt... they really love that..
They can be attracted to someone, but sometimes they flirt because they enjoy the attention and validation.
When the signs are obvious, the difference can be easy to spot. But what about when the flirting is subtle?

How can you tell whether she's genuinely interested in you or simply out for the attention?
Are we, as men, capable of telling that without directly asking her?

 

[HaleyBaron]

When she is flirting, it is both. And there is no way to tell how much is each unless she is hanging off your body without you doing a thing.

You are obviously in the camp of a guy that women don't just go up to and talk to, otherwise you would not care if they want validation or not. This is not a critique on you. I am only telling you how it is.

Now what do you do with this information? You learn that women always hold all the cards in situations involving gender dynamics. And you are always the one who is going to take the fall unless your looks or status is above everyone else in the context of the room or situation. When you see the reality, you stop trying to guess what women are thinking, and instead manipulate them to like you. Cause most women do not know what they want.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

When in doubt, pull it out



j/k you try touching her if you're together in person

 

[viking22]

Yeah try touching her or try kissing her at the end of a date. If she shows any signs of discomfort or reluctance then she's just a stroker.

Oh and a pro tip. Don't be fooled when a girl is very touchy feely. Women often do that to manipulate men.....it's called stroking...because it is something they can control and they know men respond to it. So it can be a false positive. The real test of interest is whether she enjoys being touched and kissed by you.

 

[nismo-4]

You could say calmly "If you want to take this further, set a concrete date and time." Or say "Are you into me for real or is this something you do with every guy in the room?"

I'm like any other guy that would say a woman who's interested and one who's an attention wh0re not only look the same, but dress and sound the same.

If she pulls away, you pull away further.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Yeah try touching her or try kissing her at the end of a date. If she shows any signs of discomfort or reluctance then she's just a stroker.

Oh and a pro tip. Don't be fooled when a girl is very touchy feely. Women often do that to manipulate men.....it's called stroking...because it is something they can control and they know men respond to it. So it can be a false positive. The real test of interest is whether she enjoys being touched and kissed by you.

That's what the escalation ladder is for. If she's like that, touch the small of her back, let your touch linger on her arm, move closer, facilitate the accidental boob touch on the arm and see if she obliges, etc

 

[Tilex]

Nervous energy; this one is easy to notice.

Compliance tests

Non-Autistic chicks will smile a lot or stare at you for a long time.

Proximity tests

 

[plumber]

why does it matter ? if she does what you like, does it matter why ?

 

[The Duke]

We know women flirt... they really love that..
They can be attracted to someone, but sometimes they flirt because they enjoy the attention and validation.
When the signs are obvious, the difference can be easy to spot. But what about when the flirting is subtle?

How can you tell whether she's genuinely interested in you or simply out for the attention?
Are we, as men, capable of telling that without directly asking her?

Thats a good question. A man needs to know how to separate the teasers from the pleasers.

Pay attention to body language. A girl that is truly interested(pleaser) will show more positive body language and show more interest in you than she does herself.

A girl that is a pleaser will be ok with appropriate touching. A teaser will usually move away but not always, many of them play games.

The teasers are always looking for free drinks.

Teasers never want the conversation to get too deep. Deeper conversation allows one to see the other's inner makings. Thats what they are trying to hide, so they aren't comfortable in doing so.

Teasers will set up road blocks and make it difficult to move things forward. The **** tests come often.

I had a girl that I met at a luxury lounge type bar one night that was very flirty but simply seeking validation. I played a long because my buddy was trying to get with her friend. After her first few acts, while seated in a large booth/couch, I moved in closer physically and she actually turned her body away. Once I intentionally stopped leading the conversation she did nothing to keep things going. She didn't want to give up any details about herself. She kept things very surface.

Its like I had to keep putting coins in the machine to keep it acting.

When I got up to get another drink, she made sure to ask if I'd get her one. I obliged, and a few minutes later dropped the drink off at her table and told her i was going to talk to some other girls. lol, the look on her face was priceless. So there she sat by herself with no one to use for validation.

This other time we were at roof top pool and there was a really hot chic and her friend taking non stop selfies. It was obvious these girls were attention wh0res. These girls were way out of our league lookswise but my buddy and I decided we would go over and talk to them and take pics with them for our dating profiles.

It was non stop schitt tests, but I kept the conversation going long enough to convince them to take pics with us. I am sure they saw it as a boost to their ego's and made them feel like celebrities they imagined to be. As soon as I got the pics we stood up to leave and I told them thanks, these pics will be great for our dating profiles! Then came the "you guys are fuhking azzholes". We laughed our asses off. It was ok for them to use us, but not us to use them.

 

[Bingo-Player]

Frauds are almost always overly enthusiastic in their body language and tonality

The real throat goats are more reserved they don't want to reveal all their cards too quickly

Tbh as a rule of thumb if its ever TOO easy with a 7+ you're usually getting set up

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

Are we, as men, capable of telling that without directly asking her?

No. At some point in life you'll need to actually talk to a real woman to find out what's what.