Cold approach

[ruud3123]

Hey my friends ,

I’ve been doing cold approaches during the day for about 10 years now. Over that time, I must have approached at least 1000 women. I’ve gotten plenty of numbers, but most never replied. In total, I’ve met around 10 women through day game and slept with 4.

I’m 35, 1m80, I go to the gym and have a muscular build. My skills definitely improved over the years—at the beginning I made lots of mistakes, but with experience I became much better. The truth is, I did meet a couple of amazing women this way, and it worked out. But the effort required has been huge.

Lately, it feels harder and harder to make day game work. In clubs, my ratio is actually better—I usually manage to connect with someone after about 6 nights out, and sometimes it leads to sex. But I still prefer day game… even though now it just feels exhausting and doesn’t bring the same results as before.

I’m also a bit tired of always being the hunter. I see guys who attract women naturally without putting in anywhere near the same amount of effort (and they’re not necessarily models either). It’s crazy how time-consuming this is.

To be honest, I feel addicted to day game, but it’s not giving me the return anymore. I want to change my approach, maybe find something else outside of gym, work, and day game—while still being more successful with women.

Any advice?

 

[Travel memoir21]

Yeah Bro, stick to Day Game and if you can get a Dog to be your wing man.

Best places to hunt for me in Day game are - Starbucks and local coffee shops, Bookstores, Coffee shop cafes in Shopping malls, The Beach boardwalks, Meetups.com, hobby groups, yoga and martial arts classes, church and meditation classes.

 

[SW15]

Your height is very average (5'9"-5'10").

Where are you daygaming? This sounds like somewhere in Europe.

Are you familiar with the London Daygame Model?

Blaine Anderson (a fish trying to teach men to catch fish) made a valid point on one of her YouTube Shorts about daygame. There are times when a man is doing everything correct and he will still fail on approaches.

- YouTube

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Blaine Anderson's example was an example of why non-bar approaching (typically done during daylight/early evening hours) is horribly inefficient though. The majority of women between ages 18-49 aren't seeking new penis at the moment they are approached in a non-bar setting.

Your numbers of daygame really stink. Approaching 1,000 women and only getting sex with 4 of them isn't good at all.

 

[ruud3123]

Yep in bars clubs I have a better ra

Your height is very average (5'9"-5'10").

Where are you daygaming? This sounds like somewhere in Europe.

Are you familiar with the London Daygame Model?

Blaine Anderson (a fish trying to teach men to catch fish) made a valid point on one of her YouTube Shorts about daygame. There are times when a man is doing everything correct and he will still fail on approaches.

- YouTube

Enjoy the videos and music you love, upload original content, and share it all with friends, family, and the world on YouTube.

www.youtube.com

Blaine Anderson's example was an example of why non-bar approaching (typically done during daylight/early evening hours) is horribly inefficient though. The majority of women between ages 18-49 aren't seeking new penis at the moment they are approached in a non-bar setting.

Your numbers of daygame really stink. Approaching 1,000 women and only getting sex with 4 of them isn't good at all.

Yep day game is hard. I had like 30 dates 5 turned to sex. To be honest that is the point they always have somebody who bang them. And honestly i have more success when it is the girl who show interest , like bars with alcohol women interested are not shy to come to you . But definitely day game is hard. The only issue with night game is that the day after you are tired because of the lack of sleep. yep Europe. Yep 1m80 it is not average . I think it is good . Not crazy tall like 1m90 but not a issue

 

[Cheeky_James]

Somone once wrote “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result “ ?
The reward to effort ratio from day game is extemely low. Best case 10% for a tall and very good looking guy or some kind of outlier type guy. Eg a badboy type.

10/1000 is 1%
4/1000 is 0.4%

so as you can see and have discovered it’s basically a waste of time.

Try meet women through social circle outside of bar and clubs and also online dating which probably has much better % than day game as chicks as a bigger % of chicks there are likely just looking for **** between relationships etc

 

[Cheeky_James]

I’m also a bit tired of always being the hunter. I see guys who attract women naturally without putting in anywhere near the same amount of effort (and they’re not necessarily models either).

well there lies your answer I think,
What are those guys doing?
try to befriend a few of these guys and model what they are doing.

also check out Brent Smiths stuff to switch up your mindset of being the hunter. Ideally the chick ought to be pursuing you and not vice versa.

 

[SW15]

The reward to effort ratio from day game is extemely low. Best case 10% for a tall and very good looking guy or some kind of outlier type guy. Eg a badboy type.

10/1000 is 1%
4/1000 is 0.4%

so as you can see and have discovered it’s basically a waste of time.

Try meet women through social circle outside of bar and clubs and also online dating which probably has much better % than day game as chicks as a bigger % of chicks there are likely just looking for **** between relationships etc

Tom Torero laid out realistic expectations that one should have from non-bar approaching.

What kind of realistic expectations should you have? Well, depending on your starting point, your mileage will vary. But a solid daygamer should be able to get a number from 25% of the girls he approaches. Out of those numbers, 25% should come out on dates. And from those dates, 25% should end up in his bed. If you think those statistics are depressing then look at your ratios for Tinder or dating sites.

Based on this, a daygamer would need to approach 75 women to get 19 phone numbers, 4-5 dates, and 1 new sexual partner. That's using a strong systematic approach like the London Daygame Model. I think a lot of daygamers need to approach more than 75 women to find a new sexual partner. In a better case scenario, it would realistically take most men a while to do the 75 day approaches to find a new sexual partner. Additionally, in going through this, one would probably want that sexual partner to last for some amount of time based on the effort it takes to approach 75 women in non-bar venues.

I think more men who try daygame are approaching hundreds of women before they find dates and/or sex. I think Torero's 75 women estimate is optimistic.

Both daygame and tech methods (swipe apps and sending DMs on social media) are quite inefficient even when effective.

Social circle is the best method for finding a longer term girlfriend. Most men with social circles have a limited number of times that they can draw from the social circle. Social circles do not have a positive perception of men who change out girlfriends every 1-3 years without marrying or having children (aka serial monogamy). At a certain point, the social circle will stop helping a serial monogamist male. Social circles dislike shorter term seducers even less than serial monogamists.

Both serial monogamists and shorter term seducers will eventually need to use in-person approaching or tech methods to do what they do.

 

[Gamisch]

Guys don't wanna hear this but I'll repeat my stance on this;

If you running behind prey but your ( number of and quality of) catches are lackluster, you better work on LURING the prey in.

You see, put time on earth is finite. Perhaps you could and should spent more time in the gym to work on your overall presence . Perhaps you should work on your money so you can actually offer something significant once you do catch one..my philosophy is that a man's AURA is maybe more important than the rest, although the auro is built( or broken) from within due to success, perseverance, will power ect.

The unfortunate truth is that most women will have some d1ck somewhere..yed a lot will share the same d1ck if needed. Combined with electronic dating the current market isn't as favourable to cold approach as it used to be.

At least you've learned to get over any form of approach anxiety. So IF you do get some interest you can act upon it.

 

[Clockwerk50]

Change your approach; be the one who attracts, not chases. You have to become desirable by building status, cultivating a fun and slightly daring reputation, and being seen with other attractive women if you can. You can also impress them with exceptional skills or talents, like problem-solving or something unique (e.g., being a pilot, playing guitar), also helps. Showing romantic interest too early will ruin it, so let them make the move.

@tksniper uses this strategy in his game and niche communities. Here’s a link to one of his posts.

Idk how anyone can still believe in Hypergamy in 2025

Hypergamy, at its core, is about need fulfillment. People are drawn to those who can provide something they lack. This goes far beyond wealth or looks. It could be emotional security, a sense of adventure, social status, or even an escape from a boring life. A person's value is determined by...

www.sosuave.net

 

[Cheeky_James]

Tom Torero laid out realistic expectations that one should have from non-bar approaching.



Based on this, a daygamer would need to approach 75 women to get 19 phone numbers, 4-5 dates, and 1 new sexual partner. That's using a strong systematic approach like the London Daygame Model. I think a lot of daygamers need to approach more than 75 women to find a new sexual partner. In a better case scenario, it would realistically take most men a while to do the 75 day approaches to find a new sexual partner. Additionally, in going through this, one would probably want that sexual partner to last for some amount of time based on the effort it takes to approach 75 women in non-bar venues.

I think more men who try daygame are approaching hundreds of women before they find dates and/or sex. I think Torero's 75 women estimate is optimistic.

Both daygame and tech methods (swipe apps and sending DMs on social media) are quite inefficient even when effective.

Social circle is the best method for finding a longer term girlfriend. Most men with social circles have a limited number of times that they can draw from the social circle. Social circles do not have a positive perception of men who change out girlfriends every 1-3 years without marrying or having children (aka serial monogamy). At a certain point, the social circle will stop helping a serial monogamist male. Social circles dislike shorter term seducers even less than serial monogamists.

Both serial monogamists and shorter term seducers will eventually need to use in-person approaching or tech methods to do what they do.

yes exactly approaching 75 women to get 1 lay (bast case secenario) is a total waste of time.
Doing some quick math , say it takes 1 hour to find / do an approach with 1 woman. That’s 75 hours of time spent approaching.
If a guy instead worked a job in that time that’s 2 weeks wages.
With that money he can pay for 5 different hookers and get laid 5 times . In a straightforward fashion. The hookers will have about the same level of interest in the guy as the 74 women he approached on the street. But he got laid 5 times and prob had much better sex, however he wants it.

 

[ruud3123]

well there lies your answer I think,
What are those guys doing?
try to befriend a few of these guys and model what they are doing.

also check out Brent Smiths stuff to switch up your mindset of being the hunter. Ideally the chick ought to be pursuing you and not vice versa.

yes exactly approaching 75 women to get 1 lay (bast case secenario) is a total waste of time.
Doing some quick math , say it takes 1 hour to find / do an approach with 1 woman. That’s 75 hours of time spent approaching.
If a guy instead worked a job in that time that’s 2 weeks wages.
With that money he can pay for 5 different hookers and get laid 5 times . In a straightforward fashion. The hookers will have about the same level of interest in the guy as the 74 women he approached on the street. But he got laid 5 times and prob had much better sex, however he wants it.

I like how you formulate things mate funny but completely true , Good advice

 

[Cheeky_James]

I like how you formulate things mate funny but completely true , Good advice

Thanks. Tbh I’m just repeating stuff I’ve read elsewhere.

But don't stop there! I am also very interested in observations on what these other guys you know may be doing.. to get women more easily.

 

[characternote]

Tom Torero laid out realistic expectations that one should have from non-bar approaching.



Based on this, a daygamer would need to approach 75 women to get 19 phone numbers, 4-5 dates, and 1 new sexual partner. That's using a strong systematic approach like the London Daygame Model. I think a lot of daygamers need to approach more than 75 women to find a new sexual partner. In a better case scenario, it would realistically take most men a while to do the 75 day approaches to find a new sexual partner. Additionally, in going through this, one would probably want that sexual partner to last for some amount of time based on the effort it takes to approach 75 women in non-bar venues.

I think more men who try daygame are approaching hundreds of women before they find dates and/or sex. I think Torero's 75 women estimate is optimistic.

Both daygame and tech methods (swipe apps and sending DMs on social media) are quite inefficient even when effective.

Social circle is the best method for finding a longer term girlfriend. Most men with social circles have a limited number of times that they can draw from the social circle. Social circles do not have a positive perception of men who change out girlfriends every 1-3 years without marrying or having children (aka serial monogamy). At a certain point, the social circle will stop helping a serial monogamist male. Social circles dislike shorter term seducers even less than serial monogamists.

Both serial monogamists and shorter term seducers will eventually need to use in-person approaching or tech methods to do what they do.

not to mention that since torerro faked kiss closes in infields and done other things to make him look more successful than he was, we can probably assume them numbers he gives are much better than his actual numbers! You can probably just about double it!