Finally giving up on the dating market

[CaptFinnBad]

30 dates this year ? You've not banged any of them ?

Like seriously what are you doing on these dates?

Are you even trying to have s3x with them!

 

[SW15]

OP did not learn anything useful from the dates

Sounds about right to me.

He's having a difficult time in the mating market.

From the thread below, I found out that he's only 5'7". It's difficult to impress women in Germany or the USA at only 5'7". He also only claims to be average looking. I might have given him more credit on his looks.

Approached 100 women during the day - No success!

I am an average looking, 1,73 m tall guy and I am living in germany. I started approaching women during the day on the street. I used all kinds of openers, direct and indirect. I think my body language and my voice is ok and I am not nervous around women. I got into a few nice conversations with...

www.sosuave.net

I perceive him to be deficient in looks and personality. There are mindset issues.

The fact he got 30 dates in the first half of 2025 is impressive given his height.

He also posted in 2014 about a 2012-2014 relationship.

He's had more sexual success over the years given his height, mindset, and beta male behaviors.

 

[BPH]

Given this person's shortcomings that other people have posted (since I lack background on OP) I'd be wondering how he got these 30 dates.

There's quite a big difference between establishing attraction and going on a date, versus trying to bribe somebody uninterested with a free meal.

Such is why I never lead with my wallet.

 

[Clockwerk50]

Given this person's shortcomings that other people have posted (since I lack background on OP) I'd be wondering how he got these 30 dates.

There's quite a big difference between establishing attraction and going on a date, versus trying to bribe somebody uninterested with a free meal.

Such is why I never lead with my wallet.

He joined on Sep 23, 2014; last seen Sunday at 1:08 AM lol

 

[Bokanovsky]

Hello, just wanted to share my current situation. This year was really bad so far. I had a lot of dates (about 30) and nothing came out of it. It was always the same: Went out on one or more dates then got rejected finally. Of course you can say bad game, bad attitude or something else but in my opinion I was acting just normal, I was just me.

Reading between the lines, it sounds like you have a boring personality. I don't say that as a criticism. Boring people tend to be productive, responsible and reliable. They are not, however, pvssy magnets. We are long past the days when being a boring and stable provider type with a middle class job was enough to get you a romantic partner.

You basically have two choices: (1) become ultra rich and start dating gold diggers who will tolerate your boringness in exchange for financial rewards or (2) figure out a way to stop being "just me".

 

[characternote]

I wonder if he lists his 5ft 7inches height on the app?

If not, it could be that he's kinda handsome so he gets matches, but then he meets the girls who realise he's short and so they're not attracted anymore, and from that point, nothing he does will work (so nothing to learn from the failures)

 

[BaronOfHair]

I wonder if he lists his 5ft 7inches height on the app?

...(so nothing to learn from the failures)

Nothing, except wear lifts in your sneakers + Learn to dress taller

 

[BadBoy89]

he's only 5'7

This is 95% of the problem the OP has.

@BPH has had sex with over 100 women

He has had sex with 101 women. Lets say he started at 21. 101 women / 10 years = 10 women / year.

52 weeks / 10 women = 5.2 weeks. So from 2015 to 2025, he has slept with a different women every 5 weeks.

Impressive.

based on having upper tier looks and he knows how to make women feel good and sexy in interactions. He has a link in his signature about how to get laid more.

I'll give you upper tier looks.

I won't give you "make women feel good and sexy in interactions"

When a man has upper tier looks, anything he says doesn't really matter because the women wants to get pregnant from him. Now if she is older and has trouble getting pregnant, then I'll give make women feel good and sexy interactions. Even then its not really logical because older women want money.

If a man is short and doesn't look good, anything he says to a woman to make her good and sexy will be considered creepy.

 

[crowolf]

I'd say: develop some interests, try new things in life. And involve the emotions of these women. You don't need to sacrifice your natural way of being for that. Just express yourself authentically, find joy, share enthusiasm, tell a story, evoke emotions through good conversational topics (adventure, dreams, etc.). Some flirting is essential, even for a long-term healthy relationship. Why would they want to spend time with you if you are boring? Girls wanna have fun. Now, if you are looking for a wife, this is a real struggle nowadays, it seems. But then aim elsewhere rather than online dating. And still, learn to flirt and become an interesting person.

 

[Seacoast Living]

The one point I took away from your post is that you are a normal guy. There is nothing worse than being normal. There is nothing worse than hanging out with someone who regurgitates whatever the common topic of the day is from media or social media. It's much more interesting to to have conversations with people who have unique viewpoints and challenge others logical fallacies. If you have "normal" friends, you should try talking to people with alternative viewpoints and expanding your mind to being more open instead of closed off. You're normal friends have long ago been lost to the logical fallacy of deferral to an authority figure, don't be one of those.

 

[BaronOfHair]

From the thread below, I found out that he's only 5'7". It's difficult to impress women in Germany or the USA at only 5'7

It's similarly difficult to break into the film industry, if you're not a textbook Nepo Baby with an Ivy League MFA, a former child star, or a Marlon Brando-esque savant. So, you've got options:

-Choose another career, never look back

-Hang around Reddit and dive bars, griping over the unfairness of these circumstances

-Do what 98% of everyone who's "made it" in The Biz has done, since times immemorial... Find very basic work in film(being a PA, building sets, pulling lighting, etc etc), becoming well-versed in the craft, learning how to enhance your personal charm and magnetism, etc etc

Same's true of dating and mating. MOST people DO NOT start out with immense advantages in life. We all have to build upon whatever talents we have + Add new ones whenever practical. In OP's case, he can easily throw lifts in his sneakers and learn to dress taller

 

[CoolWave1331]

You have gotten several dates, multiple even, with same woman....obviously there is not a problem with your appearance

It seems you are bombing on the first date. There can be a host of reasons. You have to be critically honest with yourself: What do you suspect is the reason? Does it appear that she seems disinterested from the get-go or is it happening as the date goes on? When/what exactly precipitated her change in behavior?

I know you said you are good guy, have good heart etc. These are all good qualities - the part where you said 'no drama' and some of the things afterwards.....this is the part the makes me nervous. I can't say for sure (only you know) but i've encountered guys who told me similar stuff before and were looking for similar answers, almost always these guys were SUPER rigid, very serious types. If this is how you are coming across on the dates I can totally see why you are striking out after first date.

I'm not saying you have to be Mr Funny pants but you have to show that you are present, engaged in the conversation; you have to let her speak and also contribute when it's your turn. Don't be afraid to touch her (use common sense), she expects you and wants you too...you want to show you find her desirable that's the point of the date. If you are very serious, tight lipped, too tough to laugh/smile, not focused and come across stiff, robotic and cold....yeah it's almost always going to be a "1 and done". You hae to lighten flirting with a girl doesn't make a guy a bad person, it's expected. Admittedly this part is a bit nuanced, it's the hardest part of the process and mastery only comes from experience. Reading won't help, you have to actively try to move past comfort zone on dates.

 

[Solomon]

Reading between the lines, it sounds like you have a boring personality. I don't say that as a criticism. Boring people tend to be productive, responsible and reliable. They are not, however, pvssy magnets. We are long past the days when being a boring and stable provider type with a middle class job was enough to get you a romantic partner.

You basically have two choices: (1) become ultra rich and start dating gold diggers who will tolerate your boringness in exchange for financial rewards or (2) figure out a way to stop being "just me".

I'm curious if OP is meeting these women on dating apps or in person or a combo of both.
Sounds to me like he's meeting them on dating apps and dating apps as we know are hit or (mostly) miss
Regardless 30 Dates even with the norm of 10-20% of First dates leading to second dates OP should be able to have interest with 3-6 chicks minimum that he can convert to a plate or two or even GF

 

[BackInTheGame78]

The one point I took away from your post is that you are a normal guy. There is nothing worse than being normal. There is nothing worse than hanging out with someone who regurgitates whatever the common topic of the day is from media or social media. It's much more interesting to to have conversations with people who have unique viewpoints and challenge others logical fallacies. If you have "normal" friends, you should try talking to people with alternative viewpoints and expanding your mind to being more open instead of closed off. You're normal friends have long ago been lost to the logical fallacy of deferral to an authority figure, don't be one of those.

I disagree. Being normal will get you laid more than ever before.

Normal doesn't mean boring, it means not being a fvcking weirdo, a degenerate, drugged out, socially inept, etc.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

I wonder if he lists his 5ft 7inches height on the app?

If not, it could be that he's kinda handsome so he gets matches, but then he meets the girls who realise he's short and so they're not attracted anymore, and from that point, nothing he does will work (so nothing to learn from the failures)

‘Kinda handsome’ doesn’t cut it.

 

[MatureDJ]

Hello, just wanted to share my current situation. This year was really bad so far. I had a lot of dates (about 30) and nothing came out of it. It was always the same: Went out on one or more dates then got rejected finally. Of course you can say bad game, bad attitude or something else but in my opinion I was acting just normal, I was just me. And just me is not enough for women or is not what women want. I am a normal, not bad looking guy with respect for other people, I have a good heart and treat people like I want them to treat me. But that also means no drama for women. I am not what they are craving, the most of them: A guy who gives them drama and makes their hamster spin. This is not me and I also don't want to be like that. I was acting like that in the past and it got me some lays but it became too stressfull to act like that. I don't believe in love from women anyway. From now on I think I will just pay for 6 and I think it will make me more happy than going on dates, spending my money and get nothing out of it, because I am how I am.. Sad but true.

Regards
summersky

How tall are you?

 

[Solomon]

After going through OP's post history it's now clear to me why he's struggling, he does the "Nice guy" game you know taking women on 6 dates in hopes of clapping cheeks and spinning her into a plate meanwhile the women have told OP they are looking for an LTR.
OP has to fix his fundamentals and really be honest with what he wants, when you lie to yourself with what you want from a woman the are the outcomes (this post)

 

[MatureDJ]

OP 30 dates in 6 months is amazing, you got guys who can't even get half of that on here so kudos.

Try a hundredth.

 

[MatureDJ]

I disagree. Being normal will get you laid more than ever before.

Normal doesn't mean boring, it means not being a fvcking weirdo, a degenerate, drugged out, socially inept, etc.

I'll believe when I see it.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I'll believe when I see it.

Not being negative constantly and mad at the world and by extension women would probably help