"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Michael Sartain: Approaching Strangers is Dead

SW15

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For those unaware, Michael Sartain is Rollo Tomassi's co-host on the Access Vegas podcast.

In this video, Michael Sartain claims that approaching strangers in real life does not result in sex and extended relationships with attractive women ages 18-24. The only way Sartain claims that approaching a stranger or using a dating app would work on attractive 18-24 year olds is if you are in the 95th percentile + of looks.

Sartain does claim that women 35+ are more likely to be more option to real life approaches or meeting strangers on dating apps.

Sartain also claims that dating apps are dead too for most men.

Is approaching strangers in real life dead?

Sartain claims that the way to get attractive younger women to have sex and get into extended relationships is through social circle building or by cultivating an amazing Instagram profile and sending DMs.
 
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"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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SW15

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So the guy who sells networking mentorship wants you to believe you can't meet girls without networking? Who'd have thunk...
That's a good point.

You have a 101 woman notch count at the moment. Your last 20 new notches were likely a combination of approaching strangers in real and swipe apps. We have a few lay reports from you so you're aware what's working right now in real life.

It's my guess that you think men in 2025 can get sex through approaching strangers in real life. It would your experience that men don't need Instagram DM game and extensive social circles to get inside of vaginas.
 

BPH

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That's a good point.

You have a 101 woman notch count at the moment. Your last 20 new notches were likely a combination of approaching strangers in real and swipe apps. We have a few lay reports from you so you're aware what's working right now in real life.

It's my guess that you think men in 2025 can get sex through approaching strangers in real life. It would your experience that men don't need Instagram DM game and extensive social circles to get inside of vaginas.
I mean, I'm sure it wouldn't hurt to have a baller Instagram profile...but you definitely don't need it.

I'm f***ing poor, driving around a sh**box car, living with my parents in suburban f***ing Delaware and (depending on whether you ask ChatGPT or Gemini) I'm in the top 1%-5% globally in terms of number of sexual partners.

So no, you don't need this BS. I think too many guys will look at his sales funnel and assume proximity to hot women means you're sleeping with them. He's just on red carpets taking pictures. The dweebs he showcases are doing the same. Just how rappers are often dating women much uglier than the dimes dancing in their music videos.

I think it's ridiculous for him to say that - and of course, he has a vested interest in convincing you it's true.

EDIT:

This reminds me of a really good quote that came out an Alex Hormozi reel I saw the other day. He described how a friend had made a ton of money with crypto. He congratulated him, told him he didn't know how he did it and didn't care to learn, saying - "if the grass is greener on the other side, it's because I don't know enough about it".

Meaning that shiny objects don't tell the story of what it took for them to be shiny.
 

SW15

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I'm sure it wouldn't hurt to have a baller Instagram profile...but you definitely don't need it.
I think this is an important point to make because Instagram game is not easy.

Getting Followers as a man is a major challenge. Most people on Instagram would rather follow women. The typical woman on Instagram has more Followers than the typical man, even excluding the OnlyFans type thots on Instagram.

In order to successfully DM on Instagram, a man needs more Followers than accounts he is Following.

He also needs to have a great lifestyle captured in pics and videos.

There are significant barriers to entry for good Instagram game.

I'm f***ing poor, driving around a sh**box car, living with my parents in suburban f***ing Delaware and (depending on whether you ask ChatGPT or Gemini) I'm in the top 1%-5% globally in terms of number of sexual partners.
This is the power of your physique. Your physique has carried you to your recent successes, in addition to a pleasant personality where you keep composed when encountered with female crap tests.

Your achievements while living with your parents in your late 20s/early 30s in a mediocre at best geographical market are impressive.

You do it primarily with real life approaching.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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Solomon

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I have said this years ago but if you're a guy looking for a girlfriend or a quality woman, social circle is the way to go
Yes it's harder, but it's far more rewarding. 3rd spaces are dead or dying, not just for social circles but also for trying to hook up c usually i.e. bars, clubs, daygame in certain cities etc.

I remember back in the day when women would be flattered if you approached them, even if they weren't interested Now we are in the era where a woman will go on Tik Tok and try to put you on blast if she found you "creepy" or "weird" modern women especially younger ones are so feminised and insufferable that approaching them is now a job instead of a fun adventure

Stay safe guys
 

SW15

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I have said this years ago but if you're a guy looking for a girlfriend or a quality woman, social circle is the way to go
Yes it's harder, but it's far more rewarding. 3rd spaces are dead or dying, not just for social circles but also for trying to hook up c usually i.e. bars, clubs, daygame in certain cities etc.
If the typical man wants a girlfriend, his best course of action is community building/social circle game. However, community building/social circle game is very slow. That involves showing up to the same type of community events week after week and building relationships with people. If someone needs to build community from scratch, it might take years before a community is built. That might mean years without sex until a man can get the correct social infrastructure in place to get the social introductions necessary for an extended sexual relationship. It might never happen despite best efforts.

Men with a sexual need try to fast track this and use swipe apps and real life approaches. More are using swipe apps as real life approaching is declining.

Fewer people now are approaching in bars compared to when I turned 21 in the mid-2000s.

I remember back in the day when women would be flattered if you approached them, even if they weren't interested Now we are in the era where a woman will go on Tik Tok and try to put you on blast if she found you "creepy" or "weird" modern women especially younger ones are so feminised and insufferable that approaching them is now a job instead of a fun adventure
In my field experience, I am seeing that approaches are not appreciated anymore.

While most women are not rude to me on approaches, the willingness to engage in conversation is often lacking. This is somewhat related to my daygame method. The majority of women between ages 18-49 aren't seeking new penis at the moment they are approached in a non-bar setting. Most of these women won't disclose a relationship in an approach. They will simply not move the conversation further and it dies out within 30-60 seconds, before a date offer can be made.
 

BaronOfHair

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Compared to Bela Lugosi
approaching strangers is alive and well

On a more serious note, the gist of Sartain's thoughts here are correct and not especially original... When David DeAngelo interviewed The Wing Girls eons ago, one of them remarked: "Women want men who already have beautiful women", and the adage "Make your single life fulfulling... You'll be a more desirable mate then" has been around for perhaps even longer than that

So, yeah, don't rely on "cold approach" alone. That's the equivalent of going into battle armed with nothing but a Barreta, even though M-16s, all manner of explosives, armor, artillery, and air support or at your disposal
 
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Thebestthereeveris

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For those unaware, Michael Sartain is Rollo Tomassi's co-host on the Access Vegas podcast.

In this video, Michael Sartain claims that approaching strangers in real life does not result in sex and extended relationships with attractive women ages 18-24. The only way Sartain claims that approaching a stranger or using a dating app would work on attractive 18-24 year olds is if you are in the 95th percentile + of looks.

Sartain does claim that women 35+ are more likely to be more option to real life approaches or meeting strangers on dating apps.

Sartain also claims that dating apps are dead too for most men.

Is approaching strangers in real life dead?

Sartain claims that the way to get attractive younger women to have sex and get into extended relationships is through social circle building or by cultivating an amazing Instagram profile and sending DMs.
Bro Ive met a bunch of these dudes in vegas where I live. They all look like DORKS with the SAME EXACT INSTAGRAM PAGE standing in front of a rented out lambo or a hotel with some corny ass caption. All the same. They do this as a quick fix. Cold approach and fitness teaches discipline, facing your fears, being as self starter, and being a go getter. These things are traits that are earned and are what ACTUALLY attracts women.

Ive met my last two gfs from dating apps like hinge and had a LOT of hookups from cold approach.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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taiyuu_otoko

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Most people who watch videos like this are too terrified to approach so they're looking for justifications not to.

These YouTube dudes are only catering to their audience.

"Hey, look over there! A cute girl that just returned my smile! I'd approach but the guys on YouTube said it didn't work..."
 

BaronOfHair

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Bro Ive met a bunch of these dudes in vegas where I live. They all look like DORKS with the SAME EXACT INSTAGRAM PAGE standing in front of a rented out lambo or a hotel with some corny ass caption. All the same. They do this as a quick fix. Cold approach and fitness teaches discipline, facing your fears, being as self starter, and being a go getter. These things are traits that are earned and are what ACTUALLY attracts women
Actually brings us back around to a conversation we're having here https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threa...a-dating-coach-for-money.284238/#post-3161008

There may be a market for "no frills" dating/mens coaches who steadfastly refuse to bulls-it their clients with transparently fraudulent glamour or bu-ka-e them with all sorts of Manosphere gibberish
 

Manure Spherian

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Is approaching strangers in real life dead?
It always was. As I’ve said repeatedly on here. I don’t know one couple formed from it.
 
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Manure Spherian

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If the typical man wants a girlfriend, his best course of action is community building/social circle game. However, community building/social circle game is very slow. That involves showing up to the same type of community events week after week and building relationships with people. If someone needs to build community from scratch, it might take years before a community is built. That might mean years without sex until a man can get the correct social infrastructure in place to get the social introductions necessary for an extended sexual relationship. It might never happen despite best efforts.
That’s also why I’ve routinely said this stuff needs to be set early! I mean VERY early.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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BillyPilgrim

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Hard to take this guy serious when he refuses to stand still for his monologues. Which is a shame since he has some good points, and a good speaking voice. Awful delivery. He's half out of breath the whole time.
 

Manure Spherian

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Hard to take this guy serious when he refuses to stand still for his monologues. Which is a shame since he has some good points, and a good speaking voice. Awful delivery. He's half out of breath the whole time.
He seems on the verge of a breakdown in all conversations.
 

Manure Spherian

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I just listened to it during my ride to work. It is actually the most useful “pick up”/meet-women video I’ve ever seen.
 

Plinco

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For those unaware, Michael Sartain is Rollo Tomassi's co-host on the Access Vegas podcast.

In this video, Michael Sartain claims that approaching strangers in real life does not result in sex and extended relationships with attractive women ages 18-24. The only way Sartain claims that approaching a stranger or using a dating app would work on attractive 18-24 year olds is if you are in the 95th percentile + of looks.

Sartain does claim that women 35+ are more likely to be more option to real life approaches or meeting strangers on dating apps.

Sartain also claims that dating apps are dead too for most men.

Is approaching strangers in real life dead?

Sartain claims that the way to get attractive younger women to have sex and get into extended relationships is through social circle building or by cultivating an amazing Instagram profile and sending DMs.
These ideas are based on psychological determinism, which doesn't hold up in the real world. Anyone with first hand experience will tell you that every person is different, and have different requirements.

Classic example of "don't listen to the experts"


It always was. As I’ve said repeatedly on here. I don’t know one couple formed from it.
So I'm 41 years old. I'm practically only attracted to girls between 18 and 25. If cold approaching is out, then what would you do?
 

kavi

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I've spent a lot of time in London and Birmingham the UKs second city. I find it rare to see men cold-approaching women, i dont do it myself. Maybe cold-approach is more of an American thing. When I was younger it was normal for young men to 'holler' at girls, but I am not seeing young men with the confidence to do it anymore. I think in general females dont really appreciate it. I would in general agree with the sentiment of the youtuber SW15 said, that cold approach could be dead totally, lets not forget many years ago the PUA scene was full of men with laycounts mostly from cold-approach, now thats all dead. Community building is the way to go imo but as mentioned its long and difficult.

Cold apprach would require a high level of Game nowadays, as this generation of women doesnt care about some guy hollering at her like that.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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