This sh**'s getting old (pun intended)

[SW15]

This is the wrong mindset. You're allowing others to dictate how you live.

Age gap relationships are very difficult to get in general.

Men move older because that's what they can get.

@BPH is good looking so he's ahead of the curve in general.

College is somewhat of a bubble and the college specific bars are difficult to break into if you're not an undergraduate or graduate student at the local university.

A 31 year old non-student will usually have trouble at college bars. Going for a slightly older woman isn't that bad of a move.

An older woman in this case is 23-26 and a recent college graduate or a working woman who didn't go to college. It's not that old in general.

Additionally, the entire Wilmington market is a difficult market because it is overshadowed by 2 bigger cities within 75 miles. The bigger issue is that he needs to leave Wilmington.

 

[Plinco]

Age gap relationships are very difficult to get in general.

I see it all of the time.

Men move older because that's what they can get.

The average IQ is also 100

 

[BPH]

What happens if he meets a girl that knocks it out of the park; whom he considers getting serious with, and then has to explain to her that he lied to her on day one?

It can be done playfully. If it doesn't go right, it will really put a pinch in his game.

My advice @BPH , just be blunt and honest with this one. Granted I know women use dishonesty, but I take the position of calling out their dishonesty and maintaining a sense of integrity.

Yeah, I agree with this. I don't want to lie. I can't think of a single time where I've lied my way into a woman's pants - and I want to keep it that way.

I can only see that creating problems in the future. If they have a problem with my age, it's THEIR problem. Like I said, everybody has their preferences. I'm just frustrated by how often it seems to be a dealbreaker in this specific environment.

 

[sevbucmash]

What happens if he meets a girl that knocks it out of the park; whom he considers getting serious with

I'd consider getting serious with a 19 year old too! They hot while they young.

 

[zekko]

I don't really know what type of solutions I'd expect to read, this is more of a rant on the ridiculousness of a number on my driver's license being what's getting in the way of me and these women - and it's starting to really piss me off.

I think the problem is that it comes off as a little creepy that an older guy is hanging around a college bar, most especially on your own. I would think that if you had gone there with a younger friend who was more appropriate for the setting, you would have your reason for being there, and it wouldn't look so creepy.

 

[Plinco]

I think the problem is that it comes off as a little creepy that an older guy is hanging around a college bar, most especially on your own. I would think that if you had gone there with a younger friend who was more appropriate for the setting, you would have your reason for being there, and it wouldn't look so creepy.

That's actually not a bad suggestion.

I'd consider getting serious with a 19 year old too! They hot while they young.

Girls are more attractive when they are young women. Personally, I like to have a good conversation with the women whom I find attractive. A conversation that isn't all intellect and actually fun.

 

[BPH]

I think the problem is that it comes off as a little creepy that an older guy is hanging around a college bar, most especially on your own. I would think that if you had gone there with a younger friend who was more appropriate for the setting, you would have your reason for being there, and it wouldn't look so creepy.

Sometimes I do go with friends, and even if I don't, I'm good friends with all the bartenders at this spot. Like, I have to throw my money at this one guy in order for him to take it because otherwise he just refills me with free doubles all night. I imagine that carries some level of social proof when you get served before the hot girls AND you get served for free - but clearly not enough to overcome the fact that I'm an outsider when it comes to their cliques.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Sometimes I do go with friends, and even if I don't, I'm good friends with all the bartenders at this spot. Like, I have to throw my money at this one guy in order for him to take it because otherwise he just refills me with free doubles all night. I imagine that carries some level of social proof when you get served before the hot girls AND you get served for free - but clearly not enough to overcome the fact that I'm an outsider when it comes to their cliques.

I would argue being chummy with the bartender would make things worse in a cliquey college bar. They could view someone like you as not just an older dude who hangs around college bars, but one who's also a regular there.

 

[BPH]

I have come to think that you are a fraud @BPH . You are acting like a desperate incel who is a virgin, very thristy for women like they will be gone tomorrow, you are getting bvtthurt cause some women don't like you, are throwing temper tantrums like a toddler because they should be drooling for you, and you basically fail every $hit test.

A man who's fvcked 90+ women failing $hit test like a noob, doesn't compute. If you've fvcked all those women for real, you should see the patterns in them and if they are not interested you don't care. You are fraud and fake.

That's cool.

I would argue being chummy with the bartender would make things worse in a cliquey college bar. They could view someone like you as not just an older dude who hangs around college bars, but one who's also a regular there.

Yeah, that's a possibility actually...hadn't thought about it that way.

 

[Clockwerk50]

That's cool.

View attachment 14184



Yeah, that's a possibility actually...hadn't thought about it that way.

Did the girl flake?

 

[BPH]

Did the girl flake?

Which one? Girl number 3 from the OP?

 

[Divorced w 3]

You give off the vibes of the guy who lives at home because of your age, and where you’re hanging out. It’s not like it’s thanksgiving and you’re home seeing college buddies hitting the old spots. You need to get your life together.

 

[Clockwerk50]

Which one? Girl number 3 from the OP?

Yea. The one that’s was down from 7 pm or 8 pm on Saturday, but you switched it to Sunday.

 

[BPH]

You give off the vibes of the guy who lives at home because of your age, and where you’re hanging out. It’s not like it’s thanksgiving and you’re home seeing college buddies hitting the old spots. You need to get your life together.

I agree. Working on that. Just frustrated with what I'm running into when exploring what's available to me NOW.

Yea. The one that’s was down from 7 pm or 8 pm on Saturday, but you switched it to Sunday.

I'm picking her up in an hour. Now that I have a work truck I can pick her up in something a little less feminine than a damn Prius. Taking her to this nice, low-key bar off-campus. I gave her a lot of outs, and despite her constant sarcasm saying "maybe" she'll show up SHE actually texted ME today to confirm we were still hanging out.

She knows I'm older, I know she's graduating in a few weeks, so I'm kinda curious how well this could go.

In other news, today's my birthday and I went out in Philly with some friends last night. Met a younger girl who didn't have a problem with my age, and I thought I was going back home with her until her drunk friend basically forced her into a cab before she could decide whether she wanted to come back with me/invite me to hers.

Anyway, I say this because she FaceTimed me later that night and was drunkenly chatting with me, getting to know me a little better and she decided it was a red flag that I A. did not have any tattoos (because she did) and B. that I had been in 3 relationships.

I can't tell if she was joking or serious, but I haven't heard from her since

 

[zekko]

Sometimes I do go with friends, and even if I don't, I'm good friends with all the bartenders at this spot. Like, I have to throw my money at this one guy in order for him to take it because otherwise he just refills me with free doubles all night. I imagine that carries some level of social proof when you get served before the hot girls AND you get served for free - but clearly not enough to overcome the fact that I'm an outsider when it comes to their cliques.

You said sometimes the girls asked you why you were there. Maybe you could say you were friends with the bartender?

 

[BaronOfHair]

I agree. Working on that...


In other news, today's my birthday and I went out in Philly with some friends last night. Met a younger girl who didn't have a problem with my age, and I thought I was going back home with her until her drunk friend basically forced her into a cab before she could decide whether she wanted to come back with me/invite me to hers.

Anyway, I say this because she FaceTimed me later that night and was drunkenly chatting with me, getting to know me a little better and she decided it was a red flag that I A. did not have any tattoos (because she did) and B. that I had been in 3 relationships.

I can't tell if she was joking or serious, but I haven't heard from her since

You've still got a lot of work to do

 

[Clockwerk50]

You've still got a lot of work to do

His work is getting laid, and he is probably going ball deeps right now lmao /s

 

[BaronOfHair]

His work is getting laid, and he is probably going ball deeps right now lmao /s

For his sake, I hope so

 

[Solomon]

You give off the vibes of the guy who lives at home because of your age, and where you’re hanging out. It’s not like it’s thanksgiving and you’re home seeing college buddies hitting the old spots. You need to get your life together.

I totally agree with this, having your own spot, even with a roommate, is very freeing. A lot of OP's issues with women stem from the fact that he doesn't have his own place. I get it, he's saving tons of dough doing it. However, once you get to a certain age (usually 30+) to a lot of women, this is going to be a turn-off and hamper your ability to keep around hot or quality women long term. An average or subpar woman won't mind, but let's be real, that's not what OP wants

In regards to college game speaking from personal experience going to bars/clubs are a waste of time. Yes you can pull of a ONS but honestly the effort isn't worth it. Yes OP is ripped but college game is all about proximity, social circle, and who is who for the most part. You need to find a connect i.e. fraternity guy or party promotor etc,. Who can get you in exclusive parties and events. I'm not keyboard jockeying here as I have done this myself when I was 30.

In my opinion, OP you would be better of saving 30K minimum and moving. The older you get the more living at home will be a strike against you.

 

[BPH]

His work is getting laid, and he is probably going ball deeps right now lmao /s

Unfortunately not. Date went well. We messed around a little in the car and I thought she was going to invite me in but she said she wanted to "make me wait". She enjoyed herself and wants to see me again tonight.

For his sake, I hope so

You can go back to not helping. It's what you were doing before and I certainly did not miss you.

I totally agree with this, having your own spot, even with a roommate, is very freeing. A lot of OP's issues with women stem from the fact that he doesn't have his own place. I get it, he's saving tons of dough doing it. However, once you get to a certain age (usually 30+) to a lot of women, this is going to be a turn-off and hamper your ability to keep around hot or quality women long term. An average or subpar woman won't mind, but let's be real, that's not what OP wants

In regards to college game speaking from personal experience going to bars/clubs are a waste of time. Yes you can pull of a ONS but honestly the effort isn't worth it. Yes OP is ripped but college game is all about proximity, social circle, and who is who for the most part. You need to find a connect i.e. fraternity guy or party promotor etc,. Who can get you in exclusive parties and events. I'm not keyboard jockeying here as I have done this myself when I was 30.

In my opinion, OP you would be better of saving 30K minimum and moving. The older you get the more living at home will be a strike against you.

Yep, I understand and agree. Just working with what I've got since I don't want the time between now and $30k to move out to be one massive dry spell.