When they say " i feel safe"

[Pandora]

What do women mean when they say " i feel safe with you". What does "safe" mean to them. This safe feeling seems to be the most important thing in sustaining a long term relationship. Many women mention this word as of upmost importance.

 

[parabellum]

She’s pair bonded

 

[BillyPilgrim]

In the lack of immediate physical danger, "safe" means comfortable, which is ok if you have sexual attraction established. If not, no bueno.

 

[zekko]

I would "safe" refers in part to you being capable of performing the "protector" role, she doesn't think people will be messing with you as a couple out in public. The other part means she doesn't see you as a creep.

 

[zekko]

Before you understand that, you need to understand how unsafe women mostly feel.

I'll see some girl jogging down a street, or YouTube videos of girls camping or hiking alone, and I have to admit, IMO they're pretty brave. If I were so physically ill equipped to defend myself, I'd be concerned about my safety a lot more often than they seem to be.

 

[Michael Chief]

It's very good. It's the exact opposite of her calling you "creepy."

 

[The Duke]

It means she feels you are looking out for her well being. She feels connected and can trust you with her emotions, thoughts, and feelings. She feels she can be honest with you and you are being honest with her. It's a big compliment, you are doing things right.

 

[Doctor Europeo]

I agree with most of the above, especially @BillyPilgrim really nailed. If there´s a big age difference, it can also be a Daddy Issues thing (not saying its a bad thing, If an older man can pull younger Im all for it).

 

[Bokanovsky]

What do women mean when they say " i feel safe with you". What does "safe" mean to them. This safe feeling seems to be the most important thing in sustaining a long term relationship. Many women mention this word as of upmost importance.

It means that she’s ready for the D. No need to overcomplicate things.

 

[Pandora]

It means that she’s ready for the D. No need to overcomplicate things.

Lol Im already giving or gave the D. I just wanted to know what they meant exactly. They dont get that safe feeling from everyman. Its also not just horniness. Like the other posters have said its feeling like you can protect her.

 

[Pandora]

It means she feels you are looking out for her well being. She feels connected and can trust you with her emotions, thoughts, and feelings. She feels she can be honest with you and you are being honest with her. It's a big compliment, you are doing things right.

Yeah great way of explaining it. I think this is it. Men need to do these things. Its not just about being a fake tough guy. Its also emotional connection. Great response man. Thanks

 

[Mertz09]

" I just wanted to know what they meant exactly" Hard to tell.??? If I knew that answer I could sell it and be as rich as ___________ fill in the blank.
Not knowing her or you..... I would HOPE that it's a good thing.

 

[zekko]

It means she feels you are looking out for her well being. She feels connected and can trust you with her emotions, thoughts, and feelings. She feels she can be honest with you and you are being honest with her. It's a big compliment, you are doing things right.

How is that showing her that you're an a-hole? I ask because for a long time on this forum people were saying you had to act like a jerk to attract women.

 

[Pandora]

How is that showing her that you're an a-hole? I ask because for a long time on this forum people were saying you had to act like a jerk to attract women.

Exactly. They did say that. They were wrong. That was primitive early 2000's seduction. I hope the meta is changing. The more you learn about women the more you realize that emotional connection/ good looks is key.

The act like an a-hole advice is lacking nuance and sophistication. It is the Model T of seduction models. I hope that most of us have advanced past that point.

The act like an A-hole people had it backwards. Girls don't like guys BECAUSE they are a-holes. They like certain guys IN SPITE of being an a-hole. Attractive guys can get away with being jerks.

That being said indifference ( being a challenge) is attractive to women. Indifference is not synonomous with being an A-hole though.

 

[The Duke]

How is that showing her that you're an a-hole? I ask because for a long time on this forum people were saying you had to act like a jerk to attract women.

For me personally I've always thought acting like a jerk/dihk in small doses at the appropriate times works wells to get a woman's attention. Helps her step back in line. Shows you arent a pushover and won't bend at her every whim.

You can still be all I mentioned earlier.

You can love your child and be kind and nurturing yet be stern and spank them and put them in timeout when needed.

This is no different.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

What do women mean when they say " i feel safe with you". What does "safe" mean to them. This safe feeling seems to be the most important thing in sustaining a long term relationship. Many women mention this word as of upmost importance.

I have never had a woman say this to me.

 

[Pandora]

I have never had a woman say this to me.

Really? Okay. Thats interesting.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

Really? Okay. Thats interesting.

‘I feel safe around you.’. Sounds like something a girl in a bad ‘80s RomCom would say.

 

[Mike32ct]

The act like an A-hole people had it backwards. Girls don't like guys BECAUSE they are a-holes. They like certain guys IN SPITE of being an a-hole. Attractive guys can get away with being jerks.

This. The Jerk vs Nice Guy debate has always been a red herring. It’s a clever way to dance around the far more important looks issue.

Back on topic, “safe” means she can relax and let her guard down because she feels like “You got this.” Even as a guy, you might have that one friend or family member who seems like he can handle anything; it’s sort of like that.

 

[Pandora]

‘I feel safe around you.’. Sounds like something a girl in a bad ‘80s RomCom would say.

Lol naw girls say this a lot. They say it when they are telling you why they appreciate you. A man that makes her feel safe is an oasis in a dessert of effeminate men.

It is rare that a man can defend her physically, pays the bill when the food comes, is decisive, makes her feel like a woman etc. They really appreciate that especially after dating the average guy. So a few have told me this about me.

Im not even anything special. I am just traditional. I am sure many other men on this forum have had women say similar things to them.