A spiral loop?

[anour]

Hey DJ’s,

i’ve recently joined this new workplace, we had a bbq party yesterday, at this bbq party nearly everybody was there (99% is within the age range of 18-25). I already met the majority prior to the bbq party, in which i had decent interactions with all (i had a playful interaction with majority of girls, among them one girl who i really dig how she looks, and we had a few playful interactions)

Party begins, i introduce myself to the people whom i don’t know, i begin having interactions with a number of people but kinda had an “off-vibe” sense from the interactions. One girl whom i was speaking to suddenly wants to leave to go “get a drink” i let her be and find her speaking to another guy -> my conclusion about that girl is she is of low-interest. I speak to another chick and she does exactly the same **** so i merely ignore her after that.

now the chick that i dig how she looks, she was rejecting a pursuit from a different guy, she was all up in her own group, she never looked my way, so i took that as an indicator of low interest and didn’t approach her during the party.

after that another instance where this chick comes sits next to me, and i offer a high-five and she was like you want to touch me with a loud voice, and suddenly gets up and goes to sits next to some other guy. I ignore her but this was the ****ing point with me, i packed my **** after that and simply left.

Today, i met the chick i dig again, where at the party yesterday never spoke to her, and something felt “very off”, i got through the day but i merely felt something was extremely off can’t explain it. They went out last night with some of the dudes to a silent disco and i really missed the opportunity to have a good time, but what happened at the party + logistics issues ****ed me up.

What are y’alls take on this? What can i do here to improve my results? I feel that sometimes i self-sabotage by doing some random dumb **** such as merely leaving very early into the party.

 

[Dr.Suave]

What are y’alls take on this? What can i do here to improve my results? I feel that sometimes i self-sabotage by doing some random dumb **** such as merely leaving very early into the party.

Stop trying to hit on girls from work. That juice is not worth the squeeze, bro.

You are young, you need some experience. F0ckin relax and keep trying different things until you figure out what works best for you.

 

[anour]

Stop trying to hit on girls from work. That juice is not worth the squeeze, bro.

You are young, you need some experience. F0ckin relax and keep trying different things until you figure out what works best for you.

I get that, but here in Netherlands workplaces are like a ****fest. Plain and simple. So in that context i feel something is wrong.

 

[anour]

@BillyPilgrim @Giovanni SouthSide @We_ArE_VeNOM @BackInTheGame78 @stringpuller @Barrister

 

[anour]

Stop trying to hit on girls from work. That juice is not worth the squeeze, bro.

You are young, you need some experience. F0ckin relax and keep trying different things until you figure out what works best for you.

Btw wdym by trying different things man?

 

[Dr.Suave]

Btw wdym by trying different things man?

Try swipe apps

try cold approaching

try social circle game

try mode one

try triple booking

try quitting porn if you havent already

try a new hobby once in a while

try going monk mode. Forget about girls for a while and focus on family/male friendships. Improve all other areas of your life (hit the gym, make some money/ build a cool life) so girls chase you instead of you chasing them.

Try staying off this website for a while. Dont overthink, bro. Go out there, meet some girls and ask them out on a date.

 

[anour]

Try swipe apps

try cold approaching

try social circle game

try mode one

try triple booking

try quitting porn if you havent already

try a new hobby once in a while

try going monk mode. Forget about girls for a while and focus on family/male friendships. Improve all other areas of your life (hit the gym, make some money/ build a cool life) so girls chase you instead of you chasing them.

Try staying off this website for a while. Dont overthink, bro. Go out there, meet some girls and ask them out on a date.

You the G. I haven’t been going out for the past two years, having trouble building and maintaining friendships. What’d you recommend i do?

 

[RazorRambo24]

NO offense man you sound like you come off creepy to most women.

Like I keep telling people, stop focusing on women right now, get in th e gym, start eating tons of protein, meet other alpha males and go out with them and really show some social status.. That will take you far .. Right now you're just going to build up failures to the point it will crush your confidence more than it will help you.

When you're young its easy to be oblivious as to how bad the things women are saying and acting like towards you really are.

I was a skinny kid growing up but I had alot of social status and clout because I was cool, but even then, I thought i was more player tahn I was- because Ig ot girls easy but, I didnt realize that alot of girls saw meas "aww hes cute" but not as this sexy man who would handle them. I saw how they acted toward other alpha males and it was more like they wold be nervous around them-- but around me they were comfortable cuz i was this skinnier/smaller guy.

Guess what, I got in the gym and started going hardcore,I devleoped a tough exterior throug being in the streets.. then women started treating me like an alpha male, they'd be shy around me , nervous and yet i could do whatever I wanted to them because i can simply say "bend over" and they would do it. and i'd slap their ass or something. Thats when u know a woman respects you/likes you

EDIT: Confused this guy with Pranshu who also has no avatar/profile pic and a foreign name.. Edited out the part that Pranshu said about himself that I though tthis guy said in a previous post

 

[anour]

NO offense man you sound like you come off creepy to most women. Judging by your post and your past posts, you're a skinny dude with a small head and small face, who's trying to pull girls but you just don't fit a respectable archetype.. so women can talk to oyu like "YOU TRYING TO TOUCH ME?" and yell at you and stuff.

Like I keep telling people, stop focusing on women right now, get in th e gym, start eating tons of protein, meet other alpha males and go out with them and really show some social status.. That will take you far .. Right now you're just going to build up failures to the point it will crush your confidence more than it will help you.

When you're young its easy to be oblivious as to how bad the things women are saying and acting like towards you really are.

I was a skinny kid growing up but I had alot of social status and clout because I was cool, but even then, I thought i was more player tahn I was- because Ig ot girls easy but, I didnt realize that alot of girls saw meas "aww hes cute" but not as this sexy man who would handle them. I saw how they acted toward other alpha males and it was more like they wold be nervous around them-- but around me they were comfortable cuz i was this skinnier/smaller guy.

Guess what, I got in the gym and started going hardcore,I devleoped a tough exterior throug being in the streets.. then women started treating me like an alpha male, they'd be shy around me , nervous and yet i could do whatever I wanted to them because i can simply say "bend over" and they would do it. and i'd slap their ass or something. Thats when u know a woman respects you/likes you

Bro i ain’t no skinny guy or what not, i’m a buff mfer getting buffer she did that out of the blue which is inconsistent with our interactions, as we have flirted beforhand in a few instances. Don’t be going around judging without knowing ****, an advice back to you.

 

[RazorRambo24]

Bro i ain’t no skinny guy or what not, i’m a buff mfer getting buffer she did that out of the blue which is inconsistent with our interactions, as we have flirted beforhand in a few instances. Don’t be going around judging without knowing ****, an advice back to you.

My fault I got you confused with Pranshu. and stuff he said about himself. You both post these type of stories and have foreign sounding names with the Green Block (no avatar/profile pic).

What stands still is that women don't respect you from what I see.. or you come off as too creepy to people. Perhaps making it weirdly obvious you're trying to be near them/interested in them-- but in a creepy way.

The other thingis, based on race, some people are really stereotypical and biased against certain ethnicities. Not sure if tht applies here though

 

[anour]

My fault I got you confused with Pranshu. and stuff he said about himself. You both post these type of stories and have foreign sounding names with the Green Block (no avatar/profile pic).

What stands still is that women don't respect you from what I see.. or you come off as too creepy to people. Perhaps making it weirdly obvious you're trying to be near them/interested in them-- but in a creepy way.

The other thingis, based on race, some people are really stereotypical and biased against certain ethnicities. Not sure if tht applies here though

Can you till some creepy behavioral stuff define that.

 

[anour]

They are in the west too. Fck fests.
The story is a bit vauge to me but I will say this if you can understand and try to apply it.
Other posters already said. When you go to these functions or parties dont try to hookup. I know that sounds counter productive but dont make the outcome the goal.
Just go to experience the good time.

I see, is that an all parties/events mindset?

 

[anour]

They are in the west too. Fck fests.
The story is a bit vauge to me but I will say this if you can understand and try to apply it.
Other posters already said. When you go to these functions or parties dont try to hookup. I know that sounds counter productive but dont make the outcome the goal.
Just go to experience the good time.

I can provide you with more context, can you tell me where are the gaps?

 

[anour]

NO offense man you sound like you come off creepy to most women.

Like I keep telling people, stop focusing on women right now, get in th e gym, start eating tons of protein, meet other alpha males and go out with them and really show some social status.. That will take you far .. Right now you're just going to build up failures to the point it will crush your confidence more than it will help you.

When you're young its easy to be oblivious as to how bad the things women are saying and acting like towards you really are.

I was a skinny kid growing up but I had alot of social status and clout because I was cool, but even then, I thought i was more player tahn I was- because Ig ot girls easy but, I didnt realize that alot of girls saw meas "aww hes cute" but not as this sexy man who would handle them. I saw how they acted toward other alpha males and it was more like they wold be nervous around them-- but around me they were comfortable cuz i was this skinnier/smaller guy.

Guess what, I got in the gym and started going hardcore,I devleoped a tough exterior throug being in the streets.. then women started treating me like an alpha male, they'd be shy around me , nervous and yet i could do whatever I wanted to them because i can simply say "bend over" and they would do it. and i'd slap their ass or something. Thats when u know a woman respects you/likes you

EDIT: Confused this guy with Pranshu who also has no avatar/profile pic and a foreign name.. Edited out the part that Pranshu said about himself that I though tthis guy said in a previous post

Do you agree with the saying that it she’s 18+ it aint shy, if it’s <18 then she can be shy?

 

[BillyPilgrim]

OP when's the last time you had actual sex?

I'm sensing a try hard vibe here, simple as that.

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

Hey DJ’s,

What are y’alls take on this?

Here is my take...

First off, opinions vary on whether or not it is cool to sh!t where you eat.

The guys who follow that standard are probably guys who are..

1. Afraid to go after women anyway..

2. Not women's first, second, or third choice anyway.

Generally speaking, the risk might outweigh the reward, but only you can decide whether it is worth it.

That being said, in workplace situations I already have a strategy.

I began my tenure on this forum talking about my ignorement method.

The Psychology of Ignoring Women

. Yeah man, this is just some advice and insight. I already know that some of you guys on here are kiss ass beta males and worship the ground that women walk on, and this information will be hard for you to grasp. However, for those that are willing to pay attention, learn something, and...

www.sosuave.net

If you improve your physical self and become enough of a mystery to the women at your workplace by denying them the attention they are accustomed to, then chances are, that may draw some of them to you without you even saying a word to them

It worked for me.

This method requires patience, and it is analogous to Bruce Lee's fight without fighting philosophy.

Similar to that, with the ignorement method you are doing something, without doing anything.

That is my advice.

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

NO offense man you sound like you come off creepy to most women.

Is it that, or do men come across as creepy to women of whom ain't attracted to them, in general?

In my cold approaching endeavors, it is a fact that I got rejected more than accepted.

It may be even a fact that I came across as creepy to those that rejected me.

But here is a brute fact; I did not come across as creepy to the ones I SNAGGED.

Sounds like our friend here is trying to maintain average Joe conversations with women who simply aren't interested.

It be like that sometimes.

 

[RazorRambo24]

Can you till some creepy behavioral stuff define that.

Yeah, sure. So for example, staring at someone you dont know too much... Being way too forward, standing or sitting too close to people you don't know but without introducing yourself.. Kinda staring and not saying anything.. Being overly touchy with someone you just met.. Not making facial expressions when talking-- for example just having likea dead stare...

Do you agree with the saying that it she’s 18+ it aint shy, if it’s <18 then she can be shy?

The age doesn't always have anything to do with shyness as people over 18 can still be shy but it does make sense that the younger a girl is , the more shy she will be. especially in a setting where she doesn't know too many people. Shyness is not hard to spot though. It is more about inexperience than age.

Is it that, or do men come across as creepy to women of whom ain't attracted to them, in general?

In my cold approaching endeavors, it is a fact that I got rejected more than accepted.

It may be even a fact that I came across as creepy to those that rejected me.

But here is a brute fact; I did not come across as creepy to the ones I SNAGGED.

Sounds like our friend here is trying to maintain average Joe conversations with women who simply aren't interested.

It be like that sometimes.

Nah I'm specifically talking about in how some people behave. ie: read the above examples I gave Anour. Also it sounds like you're assuming whether girls found you creepy or not. Its not something you can always tell, unless they reacted in a way that made it obvious they thought you were a creep.

Creep is like someone that disgusts or weirds women out or signals danger in them like some Jeffery Dahmer sht. A girl might not be interested in yoou but still not think you're a creep or giving off creepy vibes.

 

[Murk]

Didn’t see a single mention of the guys. You start a new job, you make friends with the men. That’s how you get in. You don’t go high fiving women with your awkward self, only a select few can pull that off.

They all went to a silent disco, likely a mixed group led by a man you were too ***** to speak with weeks or months ago when you first joined the company.

You don’t sound outgoing or socially savvy at all, I predict much failure in the future.

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

Yeah, sure. So for example, staring at someone you dont know too much

Which could also be taken as a form of flattery and/or attraction.

... Being way too forward, standing or sitting too close to people you don't know but without introducing yourself..

Depends.

I was on the bus one day, and was the only passenger on it at the time.

I sat up front.

The bus stops at a stop, and picks up this guy.

Of all the places to sit on the empty bus, this mofo sat directly next to me.

I found it weird and disturbing.

However, if it was a woman of whom I was attracted to that did the same thing, I would have welcomed it.

Catch my drift?

Attraction changes everything.

Kinda staring and not saying anything.. Being overly touchy with someone you just met.. Not making facial expressions when talking-- for example just having likea dead stare...

read the above examples I gave Anour

Yeah, and nothing anour has said indicates to me that he does any of those things....and even if he did, some of those things can be taken as flattery.

It just depends on the person perceiving the action(s).

. Also it sounds like you're assuming whether girls found you creepy or not. Its not something you can always tell, unless they reacted in a way that made it obvious they thought you were a creep.

I did not assume.

I said "it may be even a fact that I came across as creepy to those that rejected me."

Keyword: may.

If it may be, then it also may not be.

Creep is like someone that disgusts or weirds women out or signals danger in them like some Jeffery Dahmer sht.

Even in the case with Dahmer, he gave his victims no creepy vibes..as they all willingly went to his residence.

A girl might not be interested in yoou but still not think you're a creep or giving off creepy vibes.

I agree.