"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Is it really as bad as this forum makes it?

European-DJ

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During my 12 years of browsing this forum, I have noticed that the level of negativity has gradually increased over time. Having read a few of the posts on here I am on the verge of throwing in the towel and giving up on dating women, yet, I am perfectly capable of landing dates and hooking up with girls in real life…

is the situation really as bad as this forums makes it? Or has the number of keyboard jockeys living indoors simply reached an unprecedented high, which is poisoning the mentality / aura of the forum?
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Well it’s not just on this site, YouTube is filled with red pill and mgtow content. However, there’s a reason it has become more popular and the pua scene has failed and died down completely. We aren’t in the dotcom Bill Clinton era anymore.

Women adapted and changed their play style while PUA did nothing and now it’s essentially another way of putting women on a pedestal.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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During my 12 years of browsing this forum, I have noticed that the level of negativity has gradually increased over time. Having read a few of the posts on here I am on the verge of throwing in the towel and giving up on dating women, yet, I am perfectly capable of landing dates and hooking up with girls in real life…

is the situation really as bad as this forums makes it? Or has the number of keyboard jockeys living indoors simply reached an unprecedented high, which is poisoning the mentality / aura of the forum?
It's bad but majority don't approach. Similar to YouTube. Every boomer is pulling 10s. No receipts &&& buy my rubbish ebook or digital program.

In fairness, Gen z is disillusioned by the times. It took previous generations decades to become jaded whereas Gen z is off rip from the jump. Apathy is common but women are not inspiring. Are repugnant at best. Marriage is not possible never mind happily for majority of men. Not in the mood after he hoe phase is common place in western marriage.

A better use of time would have been approaching instead of browsing the forums. Similarly to listening to 4 hour pods on Mikaela Peterson, getting girls and or starting a side hustle is as far better use of time.

The gurus of today cannot compete with the before times. Similar to women today cannot compete with previous generations of women. It's not spectacular.

It is what it is. Stake your claim.
 

BackInTheGame78

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It's bad for the people who want it to be easy and not put in any work. For the people who just keep working and improving and putting in the effort it really isn't.

Lots of excuses but excuses never get us anywhere in life.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Rainman4707

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You can get that answer from participating in the real world, no need to ask a internet forum.
He already said that he's successful in the real world. What he's saying is that he thinks this forum is negative.
 

Who Dares Win

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I'm in my late 30s.

I can tell you 100% that the 10s were worse than the 00s and the current 20s are the all time high in terms of crappy dating market.

I observed the quality of the average woman to decline in terms of looks, personality and mental health.

If you were to be teleported to 2005, you would find the average girl at that time to be a dream in the current environment.

The damage that smartphones, social networks, mainstream media and mainstream culture did is beyong reparation.

I'm not even talking about dating and banging, I'm talking of simply enjoying a date beside the intimacy.
 

Black Widow Void

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OP - Having also joined the forum the same year as you, I would agree about the increasing negativity observation.

Although I prefer to avoid making blanketed generalizations, stereotypes do not exist without a reason. I'll share my theory.

I do believe that the younger a person is... the less likely they are to accept self-accountability. In other words... if they aren't successful with women, then it's "stupid b!tch" rather than doing the work to self-improve. I'm not saying that this applies to every young person. We have some younger insightful members and younger members willing to learn too. It's just not as many as twelve years ago.

I usually just roll my eyes, but if they bully a new forum member or bully someone walking wounded over a gal I'll call them out. I also step up to the plate, if I think that their 'advice' will wrongly influence someone less experienced. In life, we have a choice; we can be part of the problem or part of the solution.
 
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Tim Pool addressed that younger men have to compete with not only people their age but guys in their late twenties and early thirties because of dating apps and Instagram. I’m so glad I was about done with college by the time dating apps became popular
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Mike32ct

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Tim Pool addressed that younger men have to compete with not only people their age but guys in their late twenties and early thirties because of dating apps and Instagram. I’m so glad I was about done with college by the time dating apps became popular
Yes. Back in the day, it was mostly in-field night game. So, a younger, better looking guy could usually mog an older guy (in person) and win.
 

Hamurabimbi

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It was easy before Covid. Now things are reopening, seems like it’s getting easier again. Though at this point, I’m mostly just a dabbler/observer.
 

oldmanofthesea

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Social media has made many things worse - dating, and all dynamics between people. Look at the rising crime rate, mass shootings, and road rage.

But, I have noticed this forum seems to have attracted an increasing number of black pillers and incels. It is frustrating to me because it seems almost no one is interested in advice on how to succeed and would prefer to rant and complain instead. I miss some of the old posters who are no longer here and who's focus was not on complaining about the things we cannot change, but on discussing how to change your mindset and work within our current reality. You can still have sex with hot women. Lots of sex with hot women. Lots of sex with hot young women. I do it all the time. So can you.

Sit around and complain and whine and see how far it gets you. I can tell you the guys who are getting laid aren't sitting around complaining and whining. Ask yourself why that is.

is the situation really as bad as this forums makes it? Or has the number of keyboard jockeys living indoors simply reached an unprecedented high, which is poisoning the mentality / aura of the forum?
The latter.
 

Smok1nAce

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The only thing that has changed is the hook up culture (swipe apps) and them becoming "mainstream" taking a huge chunk of the dating pool away. The hook up pool is different then dating pool. Before swipe apps freshmen year of college was the "hook up" culture, now its become a staple for men and women well into their late 20s.

For people who are actually looking to date seriously dating has gotten much easier for men. If you average or above average in life dating is generally much easier today. Much more demand is put on the women in relationship and less on the man.

But I agree like most of the internet this site has become a light in the dark for the moth incels.
 
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"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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SW15

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I'm in my late 30s.

I can tell you 100% that the 10s were worse than the 00s and the current 20s are the all time high in terms of crappy dating market.

I observed the quality of the average woman to decline in terms of looks, personality and mental health.

If you were to be teleported to 2005, you would find the average girl at that time to be a dream in the current environment.

The damage that smartphones, social networks, mainstream media and mainstream culture did is beyong reparation.

I'm not even talking about dating and banging, I'm talking of simply enjoying a date beside the intimacy.
I am in my late 30s as well & this has been my experience. There’s a notable difference between now & 2003-2006.
 

Robert28

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The only thing that has changed is the hook up culture (swipe apps) and them becoming "mainstream" taking a huge chunk of the dating pool away. The hook up pool is different then dating pool. Before swipe apps freshmen year of college was the "hook up" culture, now its become a staple for men and women well into their late 20s.

For people who are actually looking to date seriously dating has gotten much easier. If you average or above average in life dating is generally much easier today. Much more demand is put on the women in relationship and less on the man.
I disagree, I’m finding it almost impossible to find a girl that wants a relationship. I’m talking more than a month or two. Women are looking for the smallest stupidest things to disqualify a guy, what you could get away with 10-20 years ago will get you blown out the water now. You basically have to constantly walk on egg shells around women now, make zero mistakes, always say the right thing or it’s game over.
 

Doctor Europeo

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I remember reading here about a guy who went to the gym regularly and had good looks. He went on OLD and had 100 matches. Of those 100 matches only 4 agreed to a date. Of those 4, half flaked and half showed up.

Of the ones the showed up, none had sex with him and eventually ghosted or fizzled. So, of 100 matches, not a single lay.

I remember saying something along the lines of "No way, I dont go to the gym as much as him and my results are not that bad" and someone pointed out that the difference in location might have something to do with it. So, to answer your question, Is it really as bad? For some guys yes, but dont let that dicourage you.
 

oldmanofthesea

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During the tail end of the pandemic last summer, cold approaching wasn't working due to mask mandates so I reluctantly got on OLD. I paid $30 for the feature on one particular app that lets you see who has already liked you, and I chose the best three women of the bunch to match with, chatted, and asked them out. All three agreed. I slept with the first one on the first date but lost interest in her so ultimately ghosted her. The second one ended up being ok looking in-person but not hot enough for my liking. She chased me a bit after the first date but I ultimately ghosted her. The third one was much hotter and skinner in person (105lbs); made out with her on the first date and slept with her on the third date. The first round of dates took place over the span of 7 days.

I did not have that kind of success when I first found this forum and red pill. What I experienced was more like what Dr.Suave just described. Yet now my experience is different. The only differences in me between then and now? I've gotten even older, gained 10lbs of fat, lost my six-pack, and learned a boatload of game and confidence. I don't go to the gym.
 

Striker_93

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You basically have to constantly walk on egg shells around women now, make zero mistakes, always say the right thing or it’s game over.
Speak for yourself, when a girl really likes you, you can get away with anything, you can do no wrong in there eyes lol, unless of course these girls are not attracted to you.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

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