"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Hit a two plate bench today

darksprezzatura

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Seemed like I was stuck at 200 for months.
I'm a beginner with about 1 year of proper training and nutrition.

Today was a rest day, I just went to the gym to stretch.

Warm up sets became working sets and I felt strong.

Things rarely go as planned. The other times I planned to hit a PR failed.

Supplements I used before the bench: beta alanine, creatine monohydrate, citrulline malate, caffeine, multivitamin, probiotic, fish oil.

Pre-workout meal: Rice and chicken+ protein shake

This is by no means anything to brag about but for a guy 300+ lbs over two years back in a huge 500 calorie deficit since, I gained strength and mass while losing over 100 lbs in fat.

Feel free to comment if you have any questions.

Current stats: 6'2 + 200 lbs + 17% body fat
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Lone Philosopher

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Congrats bro, 225lbs is a huge milestone in my opinion. I've seen struggling with my bench as of late. Stuck at 185lbs for working sets for the last month or so. What worked for you to get your weight up?
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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Seemed like I was stuck at 200 for months.
I'm a beginner with about 1 year of proper training and nutrition.

Today was a rest day, I just went to the gym to stretch.

Warm up sets became working sets and I felt strong.

Things rarely go as planned. The other times I planned to hit a PR failed.

Supplements I used before the bench: beta alanine, creatine monohydrate, citrulline malate, caffeine, multivitamin, probiotic, fish oil.

Pre-workout meal: Rice and chicken+ protein shake

This is by no means anything to brag about but for a guy 300+ lbs over two years back in a huge 500 calorie deficit since, I gained strength and mass while losing over 100 lbs in fat.

Feel free to comment if you have any questions.

Current stats: 6'2 + 200 lbs + 17% body fat

Not sure what conversion exactly but big ups. I am jealous of you in the gym. It's been a year and we're on nationAL lockdown. I don't think it would be coming back.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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Congrats bro, 225lbs is a huge milestone in my opinion. I've seen struggling with my bench as of late. Stuck at 185lbs for working sets for the last month or so. What worked for you to get your weight up?
I breakthrough plateaus by changing up my workout range. Hypertrophy to strength train to power lift. So 3 working sets 8-12reps. At plateau technique is helpful shifting to strength train 5 sets of 5. The next hail Mary play is power lift 1-3rep max for final week. 6-8;week transition gradual but incremental every week. A few kg is manageable every week pending age, testosterone, sleep, diet, etc. The mind ****kkk is dropping reps for strength and putting up new PRs. At first, it's relative because you are doing essentially the same thing. But if you break a previous PR it's tapping into that winner effect.

What works for me doesn't necessarily guarantee that it's for you. Know thyself. See what works for you and what your body responds to from training. You can do 21 and me plus pay to have it transcribed to know your best bet for training.
 

darksprezzatura

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Not sure what conversion exactly but big ups. I am jealous of you in the gym. It's been a year and we're on nationAL lockdown. I don't think it would be coming back.
2 plates ~ 225 ~ 102 kgs.

If I was in your place, I'd max out on weighted pull-ups every alternate day. Get those wings flaring.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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EyeBRollin

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I breakthrough plateaus by changing up my workout range. Hypertrophy to strength train to power lift. So 3 working sets 8-12reps. At plateau technique is helpful shifting to strength train 5 sets of 5. The next hail Mary play is power lift 1-3rep max for final week. 6-8;week transition gradual but incremental every week. A few kg is manageable every week pending age, testosterone, sleep, diet, etc. The mind ****kkk is dropping reps for strength and putting up new PRs. At first, it's relative because you are doing essentially the same thing. But if you break a previous PR it's tapping into that winner effect.

What works for me doesn't necessarily guarantee that it's for you. Know thyself. See what works for you and what your body responds to from training. You can do 21 and me plus pay to have it transcribed to know your best bet for training.
Training for hyper trophy doesn’t help for strength PRs. If you want to hit PRs, decrease to rep range to 2-3 reps maximum. Deload when plateaus persist for several workouts.

Most natural lifters do max workouts too frequently. Good reading on the topic is Practical Programming by Mark Rippetoe.

2 plates ~ 225 ~ 102 kgs.

If I was in your place, I'd max out on weighted pull-ups every alternate day. Get those wings flaring.
Nice work that’s what I bench for reps. Chin ups are usually better than pull-ups due to bicep activation and being able to use heavier weight.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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2 plates ~ 225 ~ 102 kgs.

If I was in your place, I'd max out on weighted pull-ups every alternate day. Get those wings flaring.
When my gym was open, some prick stole the weighted belt and chain. One of my mats bought a setup for home. Pull up dip rack station. Mine is more like Rollos then that. Thanks for the tip.
 

darksprezzatura

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Congrats bro, 225lbs is a huge milestone in my opinion. I've seen struggling with my bench as of late. Stuck at 185lbs for working sets for the last month or so. What worked for you to get your weight up?
~ 15x1, 95% RM
~ 5x3, 90% RM
+ Some hypertrophy work

Twice a week.

Carb loading on chest days

Equal importance to all other body parts, 6-8 rep strength/hypertrophy mixed training.

Back, triceps, legs, delta all play their roles in bench.

Proper form and bar path videos helped.

PS: Regular powerlifting styke bench bar path shouldn't be a straight line
 

darksprezzatura

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Training for hyper trophy doesn’t help for strength PRs. If you want to hit PRs, decrease to rep range to 2-3 reps maximum. Deload when plateaus persist for several workouts.

Most natural lifters do max workouts too frequently. Good reading on the topic is Practical Programming by Mark Rippetoe.



Nice work that’s what I bench for reps. Chin ups are usually better than pull-ups due to bicep activation and being able to use heavier weight.
What helped you to bench 225 for reps. I can just squeeze out one atm.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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TheProspect

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What helped you to bench 225 for reps. I can just squeeze out one atm.
Years of lifting. And by reps I mean I can do a triple. 225 is an impressive bench. Also, what is your weight?

225 is not so impressive for a 200+ Lb male...
Yeah I feel bench press is one of those exercises that most people are unable to make gains rapidly on. Takes times and requires some kind of a plan.

I also recommend Mark Rippletoe's Starting Strength. I used it during off-seasons back when I played football.

I think it's also important to realize that different individuals have different areas where they are naturally stronger at than others, both in regards to muscle groups and to particular exercises. For example, I have naturally strong legs and a great grip strength. For my barbell squats and deadlifts, after factoring in beginner gains, I have a much higher floor than most other people on those exercises. Chest on the other hand takes some intentionality in order for me to make significant gains (both strength and aesthetically).
 

darksprezzatura

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Years of lifting. And by reps I mean I can do a triple. 225 is an impressive bench. Also, what is your weight?

225 is not so impressive for a 200+ Lb male...
Yea I weigh 200 atm. Still learning.

Been an year since I started lifting. Couple of months bench pressing. I used to do dumbell presses earlier. Now I mix it up.
 

darksprezzatura

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Yeah I feel bench press is one of those exercises that most people are unable to make gains rapidly on. Takes times and requires some kind of a plan.

I also recommend Mark Rippletoe's Starting Strength. I used it during off-seasons back when I played football.

I think it's also important to realize that different individuals have different areas where they are naturally stronger at than others, both in regards to muscle groups and to particular exercises. For example, I have naturally strong legs and a great grip strength. For my barbell squats and deadlifts, after factoring in beginner gains, I have a much higher floor than most other people on those exercises. Chest on the other hand takes some intentionality in order for me to make significant gains (both strength and aesthetically).
You're correct about genetics and Starting Strength being bible.

It seems way too focused on the three core lifts though.

Personally, I like to mix it up, plus I'm reading 48 laws a chapter a day so I'll do a detailed analysis soon. Thanks for that re-emphasis.

Youtube ftw!

For nutrition, I check out Greg Doucette, Dereck from More Plates, More Dates.

For form and training, John Meadows has lots of gems.

I get a bag of low cal popcorn late night, and just watch their videos.

Deadlift and squats kind of scare me with all the horror stories wrt spinal injuries I've seen/read, maybe studying starting strength properly should be a pre requisite to doing them right.
 

TheProspect

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What helped you to bench 225 for reps. I can just squeeze out one atm.
Yea I weigh 200 atm. Still learning.

Been an year since I started lifting. Couple of months bench pressing. I used to do dumbell presses earlier. Now I mix it up.
Your goal is to get a stronger bench then, yeah?

You mentioned you were previously 300+ lbs and now 200. I would expect someone of your weight to be able to bench much more than one rep at 225 after a few months of bench press. Sometimes losing weight too quickly can impact your strength and power.

I recommend either a deload phase or to take a full week off of bench press, and come back with a plan.

Maybe try out StrongLift's 5x5, and perhaps add in any ancillary exercises you want for aesthetic reasons. I've personally made bench press gains when I took a week off after hitting a plateau and getting on that StrongLifts program (which was the program I trained for football, not Starting Strength, I got confused).

I also recommend training grip strength via farmer walks and double overhand grip deadlifts with no chalk or wristwraps. Many people don't mention it, but a stronger grip will help out all your lifts, especially back exercises. And a stronger back helps your bench, specifically the eccentric portion.
 

EyeBRollin

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Maybe try out StrongLift's 5x5, and perhaps add in any ancillary exercises you want for aesthetic reasons. I've personally made bench press gains when I took a week off after hitting a plateau and getting on that StrongLifts program (which was the program I trained for football, not Starting Strength, I got confused).
Stronglifts got me started. Great program. Though I find weighted chin ups to be a lot more useful than barbell rows. Barbell Rows even when done correctly are still an ancillary lift.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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darksprezzatura

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Your goal is to get a stronger bench then, yeah?

You mentioned you were previously 300+ lbs and now 200. I would expect someone of your weight to be able to bench much more than one rep at 225 after a few months of bench press. Sometimes losing weight too quickly can impact your strength and power.

I recommend either a deload phase or to take a full week off of bench press, and come back with a plan.

Maybe try out StrongLift's 5x5, and perhaps add in any ancillary exercises you want for aesthetic reasons. I've personally made bench press gains when I took a week off after hitting a plateau and getting on that StrongLifts program (which was the program I trained for football, not Starting Strength, I got confused).

I also recommend training grip strength via farmer walks and double overhand grip deadlifts with no chalk or wristwraps. Many people don't mention it, but a stronger grip will help out all your lifts, especially back exercises. And a stronger back helps your bench, specifically the eccentric portion.
Stronglifts got me started. Great program. Though I find weighted chin ups to be a lot more useful than barbell rows. Barbell Rows even when done correctly are still an ancillary lift.
You both seem well experienced and recommend Stronglift's program. Social proof enough.

I'll check it out tonight.

Yes, I weigh 200 lbs right now, since losing 100 lbs over the course of 1-1.5 years.

A 500-700 calorie deficit now since I started off with 300.

I did continue to make small strength gains despite such a long term deficit.

Once I reach nearer to 10% bodyfat, like say 12ish, ill go for a 4 week mini bulk, hope my bench would increase with adequate carbs and calorie surplus.

Adding bench on a deficit is tough as nails.

Right now I'm definitely concerned about metabolic downregulation. Might need to take you up on your suggestion of a deload week, with a slightly lower calorie deficit.

Especially with a slight shoulder injury I made a thread about.
 

EyeBRollin

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It’s better to get strong first then try to lose the weight afterwards with all the added muscle. Squat centric programs such as SL 5X5 and Starting Strength are extremely calorie intensive especially once the intermediate phase is reached.

For a 200 lb male, 225 lb is not that impressive. You should aim for 315 lb (3 plates) as a goal. For context, my 225 lb bench is at a BW of 165-170. My lifetime 1RM was 260. I’m mostly ectomorph (I have pics in colas thread)
 
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darksprezzatura

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It’s better to get strong first then try to lose the weight afterwards with all the added muscle. Squat centric programs such as SL 5X5 and Starting Strength are extremely calorie intensive especially once the intermediate phase is reached.

For a 200 lb male, 225 lb is not that impressive. You should aim for 315 lb (3 plates) as a goal. For context, my 225 lb bench is at a BW of 165-170. My lifetime 1RM was 260. I’m mostly ectomorph (I have pics in colas thread)
Yes, that makes sense but I've also read studies which show that insulin sensitivity is high at a low body fat percentage ~ easier to build muscle.

Apart from that it would be psychologically very satisfying to see myself vascular and lean with abs popping. I just see faded outlines of the upper two at ~ 17% tbf, because I've always been 25+ all my life.

My aim is to get shredded to ~ 10% tbf and then bulk till 12-15% tbf and repeat.

Maintain strength as much as possible during any cut.

It's a long grind. Not fretting with individual steps. Just putting in the work consistently.

I'll still study SL 5X5. Thanks for this!
 

EyeBRollin

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Yes, that makes sense but I've also read studies which show that insulin sensitivity is high at a low body fat percentage ~ easier to build muscle.

Apart from that it would be psychologically very satisfying to see myself vascular and lean with abs popping. I just see faded outlines of the upper two at ~ 17% tbf, because I've always been 25+ all my life.

My aim is to get shredded to ~ 10% tbf and then bulk till 12-15% tbf and repeat.

Maintain strength as much as possible during any cut.

It's a long grind. Not fretting with individual steps. Just putting in the work consistently.

I'll still study SL 5X5. Thanks for this!
Trust me. Losing weight before adding muscle is counterproductive. That’s the long way. Get strong first. Muscles are extraordinary efficient calorie burners. You may find once you are squatting 300 lbs for reps you’ll only need to dedicate weeks to cutting as opposed to months or years...
 

BackInTheGame78

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I breakthrough plateaus by changing up my workout range. Hypertrophy to strength train to power lift. So 3 working sets 8-12reps. At plateau technique is helpful shifting to strength train 5 sets of 5. The next hail Mary play is power lift 1-3rep max for final week. 6-8;week transition gradual but incremental every week. A few kg is manageable every week pending age, testosterone, sleep, diet, etc. The mind ****kkk is dropping reps for strength and putting up new PRs. At first, it's relative because you are doing essentially the same thing. But if you break a previous PR it's tapping into that winner effect.

What works for me doesn't necessarily guarantee that it's for you. Know thyself. See what works for you and what your body responds to from training. You can do 21 and me plus pay to have it transcribed to know your best bet for training.
The ultimate plateau buster is doing 4 weeks of static holds on big lifts...you will blow your old PRs away after starting back up afterwards.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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