Advice from the old lady:
I’ve got half a dozen close male friends and I agree with
@RangerMIke and @LARaider85 entirely.
I will wing for my male friends and they will wing for me. Sometimes I go out socially with them. We typically pay our own way but sometimes we take turns paying. These are men I genuinely enjoy their company but I don’t care to date them (and/or they don’t care to date me) for whatever reason. These are all very attractive men who can get women easily. Just as I’m a very attractive women who has no issues attracting men. We are all high value in our own ways and in the same social circles and so forth. We always run into people we know to one degree or another all the time.
I do not like orbiters, do not keep orbiters and I do not orbit myself. I also do not ask for favors or money or resources or whatever. I don’t use people.
If you have people trying to use you, or women trying to use you? Simply say no and drive on.
I did just this week have one of my male buddies freak out on me out of nowhere. Apparently he has harbored an agenda of wanting to date me for quite some time and he has suddenly become very judgmental and jealous and so forth because he doesn’t like one who I am seeing, and is very jealous of another. So he went and said a bunch of really out of line stuff to me, and although I’ve made it crystal clear I’m not interested in him, I’ve introduced him to other pretty women, including close friends of mine, and I’ve winged for him many many times, he still harbored an agenda.
So the other day I jettisoned him. Nobody gets a say in how I conduct my life and I’m not putting up with undue drama in my life from a man I am NOT involved with who tries to orbit.
I will not retain orbiters. Friends, yes. Men I date, yes. Orbiters? Nope.