I ****ed up

[captain55]

Met a girl I hit it off with when I moved out here. She was great cooked for me cleaned for me helped me organize the little things in life us men hate doing. But I felt like she wasn’t hot enough for me to commit to. I ****ed around on her and ghosted her ended up hooking up with another chick that same night and she found about it.

Ran into her 3 weeks later and we tried working things out, but she couldn’t get passed what I did to her so we just agreed to end it. I know she’s done with me. I have too much pride to ask for her back, not sure if I want her back but can’t help but miss her.

I ****ed up fellas

 

[captain55]

Oh and I’m in a small town these days so I’m going to have to run into her at bars and clubs with guys all over her. Lovely. Never had to deal with this **** in a big city

 

[BackInTheGame78]

If you don't think she is hot enough in the long run then why worry about it?

All that would happen is that you'd get back together and things would be good for a few months and then the same thoughts would creep into your head and you'd do the same thing again.

Better to just start clean with someone hotter if that is what you need.

 

[Romanemp22]

Even if you get back together, you will always have to deal with her not trusting you and thats not worth it. Dont settle down with women who you dont desire 100 %.

 

[Roober]

Lick you wounds, and move on to the next one...

 

[Lookatu]

You did fvck up but live and learn.

However, it sounds to me that she wasn't the complete package and that's the reason why you did what you did.

Looks like you need to find someone hotter with her same nurturing and caring personality as your previous girl. That is the part you probably miss.

But you gotta figure out what's more important to YOU. We are never going to be able to find the perfect gal. You just have to weigh your options and figure out if a supportive, caring gal that may just be average looking is more important than having a hottie HB9 that can't cook or clean and makes you do everything.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Even if you get back together, you will always have to deal with her not trusting you and thats not worth it. Dont settle down with women who you dont desire 100 %.

We got several factors:

1. Desire
2. Respect
3. Do they want to work with you
4. Are they helpful
5. Does she have your back?
6. Does she show her worth?

 

[Tilex]

I don't think you actually missed her.
I believe you missed having a mommy maid to cook and clean up after you.

How can you miss someone you weren't initially attracted to?

 

[Blacksheep]

Met a girl I hit it off with when I moved out here. She was great cooked for me cleaned for me helped me organize the little things in life us men hate doing. But I felt like she wasn’t hot enough for me to commit to. I ****ed around on her and ghosted her ended up hooking up with another chick that same night and she found about it.

Ran into her 3 weeks later and we tried working things out, but she couldn’t get passed what I did to her so we just agreed to end it. I know she’s done with me. I have too much pride to ask for her back, not sure if I want her back but can’t help but miss her.

I ****ed up fellas

I've made a lot of mistakes in my life... and the only positive thing we can do with that is take a time to meditate or think about that and understand where did you fail and how can you make it better next time.

Ask yourself if what you miss is her or are you missing something inside you? Emotions are very tricky sometimes... It takes some time to look at it in a conscious way.

" She was great cooked for me cleaned for me helped me organize the little things in life us men hate doing. "

For that part I would say that maybe you are not missing her... you're missing those things you think you are not able to do.

A relationship can sum up to our lives and help with some stuff, but anyone can't hold accountable for what is your responsibilities. I'm not telling you're doing it, but this phrase I quoted has some interesting points to think about.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I don't think you actually missed her.
I believe you missed having a mommy maid to cook and clean up after you.

How can you miss someone you weren't initially attracted to?

So you desire masculine women in your life? We have things we do for each other. Men do certain masculine tasks and women do certainn feminine tasks. It was like this by nature.

 

[Tilex]

So you desire masculine women in your life? We have things we do for each other. Men do certain masculine tasks and women do certainn feminine tasks. It was like this by nature.

Of course!
But cooking is a skill that ALL men need to know.
I don't know about you, but I try to challenge myself on crafting new techniques and combining bold new flavors.
I push myself into mastering every type of cuisine.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Of course!
But cooking is a skill that ALL men need to know.
I don't know about you, but I try to challenge myself on crafting new techniques and combining bold new flavors.
I push myself into mastering every type of cuisine.

I 110% agree that men should be able to cook for themselves. But I also agree that in a relationship that a woman should do a good percentage of the traditional "feminine" tasks. ( they alternate cooking ).

 

[Blacksheep]

I 110% agree that men should be able to cook for themselves. But I also agree that in a relationship that a woman should do a good percentage of the traditional "feminine" tasks. ( they alternate cooking ).

Not only cooking... Being able to clean your own house, wash clothes and dishes gave us some great lessons in life. Like giving more value to some stuffs and also more sense of independence.

At least if you are single... Then if someone marry, it can be splitted up and women keep the more feminine tasks.

I know how to clean my house but I know some women are way more careful doing that than I.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Not only cooking... Being able to clean your own house, wash clothes and dishes gave us some great lessons in life. Like giving more value to some stuffs and also more sense of independence.

At least if you are single... Then if someone marry, it can be splitted up and women keep the more feminine tasks.

I know how to clean my house but I know some women are way more careful doing that than I.

Right some are more careful at certain tasks.... But you have a growing multitude who don't know how to do those things, or they are entitled enough to think the man should do those things.

 

[Romanemp22]

We got several factors:

1. Desire
2. Respect
3. Do they want to work with you
4. Are they helpful
5. Does she have your back?
6. Does she show her worth?

Finding a girl that always have your back is very rare and most likely those are wife material. In majority of cases once things go south or you are in a tough spot in life, most women just leave.

 

[Blacksheep]

Right some are more careful at certain tasks.... But you have a growing multitude who don't know how to do those things, or they are entitled enough to think the man should do those things.

Thats true!

The famous spoiled generation. The old generation failed when they thought giving our generation more comfort would be a good thing.

Comfort is good, when you sweat for it and you know the true price to achieve that.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Finding a girl that always have your back is very rare and most likely those are wife material. In majority of cases once things go south or you are in a tough spot in life, most women just leave.

Should we "tolerate" a gf or wife that leaves just because you get in a "tough spot"? The rest of that bullshyt loyalty, pump and dump.

 

[Lookatu]

Should we "tolerate" a gf or wife that leaves just because you get in a "tough spot"? The rest of that bullshyt loyalty, pump and dump.

No one is a true gf/wife material if they can't stick with you through thick and thin. They are merely plates or ones that pretend, through manipulation tactics. Unfortunately, a lot of guys do not see this and end up on forums like this after the fact.

 

[Romanemp22]

Should we "tolerate" a gf or wife that leaves just because you get in a "tough spot"? The rest of that bullshyt loyalty, pump and dump.

Ofcourse not, if shes not by your side all the time, she can hit the road.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

No one is a true gf/wife material if they can't stick with you through thick and thin. They are merely plates or ones that pretend, through manipulation tactics. Unfortunately, a lot of guys do not see this and end up on forums like this after the fact.

True.

Dating coach Dr BOA brought up a point I NEVER heard in the 10+ yrs I've been on this subject. In the christian bible it's said that a "man who finds a wife finds a good thing". Then it's said that a "wife is a virtuous woman"... Thusly, if your wife is not a virtuous woman, she's not a wife at all, she NEVER was. So that problem is on you.

I used to think the "pump and dump" men were harsh or "treating women bad". I now see that it's the right way to be for those situations.