Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Holding hands

RickTheToad

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Yes, I had my fair share of inquiries when I first posted here, even with my current posting style. Be careful. There's men on here who will be sweet and nice to you and then turn on a dime just to be evil. They'll post they have pictures of you, that you've sent them nudes, that you've pleaded with them to sex them, etc. I was sincerely trying to be helpful and encouraging and all it got me was posters lying about me. That DM you sent drunkenly? It's been passed around and they're talking about you. My unsolicited advice? Don't share anything about who you are, not your name, phone number, pictures, etc. This isn't a safe place, at all. My DMs are off. It's not worth the hassle.
Seriously?
 

sazc

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Seriously?
Yes.
I had a handfull of men reached out to me via private message asking for advice. I'm a nice person and wanted to be helpful. We chatted about general sh1t as well. All decent interaction. Next think I know, sometimes literally the next day, they would post dismissing my contribution as a woman on the open forum (when they just asked for help in private). Another one made up stories about how I was begging to meet him, another one claimed I sent him nudes, another one pm'ed me that I was a racist, another one pm'ed me and opened with a claim that he was upset and, when I replied trying to be supportive, he got nasty with me.

Lol that's what I get for trying to be helpful and nice. I turned off my private messages. I'm not about the drama.

It's not surprising to me that some guys on here have trouble finding and keeping quality women.
 

RickTheToad

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Yes.
I had a handfull of men reached out to me via private message asking for advice. I'm a nice person and wanted to be helpful. We chatted about general sh1t as well. All decent interaction. Next think I know, sometimes literally the next day, they would post dismissing my contribution as a woman on the open forum (when they just asked for help in private). Another one made up stories about how I was begging to meet him, another one claimed I sent him nudes, another one pm'ed me that I was a racist, another one pm'ed me and opened with a claim that he was upset and, when I replied trying to be supportive, he got nasty with me.

Lol that's what I get for trying to be helpful and nice. I turned off my private messages. I'm not about the drama.

It's not surprising to me that some guys on here have trouble finding and keeping quality women.
Maybe they should start by trying to hold your hand first before asking for your nudes?
 

sazc

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Maybe they should start by trying to hold your hand first before asking for your nudes?
Haha there was no asking for them. There was no sending of them either. Just the claim that I sent them. Other members we're asking if it really was me so the person must have got some off the internet and floated them as me Pathetic.

Like I said, sometimes I completely understand why some of these men struggle.
 

Brooks

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Like I said, sometimes I completely understand why some of these men struggle.
Well yea. They’re guys on a dating forum. Most here spend more time on the forum rather than being around actual women.
So no wonder why people like @RickTheToad tries to flirt with you and seekeroftheway any chance he gets.
 

Billtx49

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Haha there was no asking for them. There was no sending of them either. Just the claim that I sent them. Other members we're asking if it really was me so the person must have got some off the internet and floated them as me Pathetic.

Like I said, sometimes I completely understand why some of these men struggle.
Well, thanks for being here and giving the forum a reality based female perspective on the issues …
 

sazc

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Well, thanks for being here and giving the forum a reality based female perspective on the issues …
Thanks for being reliably sweet and reasonable :)
 

sazc

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Well yea. They’re guys on a dating forum. Most here spend more time on the forum rather than being around actual women.
So no wonder why people like @RickTheToad tries to flirt with you and seekeroftheway any chance he gets.
He's not flirting with me, he's just a chill dude that likes to joke around, he doesn't need to pick up chicks on an internet forum, from what I can see, he has real life game
 

Brooks

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He's not flirting with me, he's just a chill dude that likes to joke around, he doesn't need to pick up chicks on an internet forum, from what I can see, he has real life game
:rolleyes:
Hahah You’re joking.. right?
He’s definitely trying to flirt. He thinks he has online game. A choke collar sent to seeker? C’mon.. yea nice guy.

This is the guy who is asking questions about BPD women and wondering if he should pursue or not.
Just curious if you’ve read his post and thread history.. seems like he’s oozing with real life game.
And game in real life is just someone who is trying to seduce women because the women don’t seduce him. Note why he has to go to meet ups in his spare time

I just really don’t like this guy. Can anyone else see how hard he’s trying or is it just me? Literally every thread he has some
Snarky remark or is telling another to read the DJ bible. Wants so bad to be a Don Juan.

You can put a tux on a toad but at the end of the day he still belongs in the swamp.
 

Atom Smasher

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Every man does wonder why a woman would hang out frequently on a men's forum such as this. It's inevitable that they are going to perceive some women as being here to straighten them out and correct them. That's probably where the tension comes from.

Certainly, a woman who hangs out here cannot be in any way representative of women at-large, because most women would normally keep a wide berth of this place.

I myself take all women's posts with a grain of salt, knowing that they aren't representatives of the norm. Having said that, I think there are a couple of women here who have a pretty good head on their shoulders (I'll never reveal who, though). I find myself wondering why some are here, and my best guess is that the place provides a little drama that they find interesting, plus there's the attention.
 

2Rocky

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One of the best compliments I received was my girl talking about the way she LOVED the way I reached back for her hand as I walked. That she felt cared for and drawn to grab it. She found it refreshing that I LEAD her and took charge without being an *******.

Even with women I'm not wooing, I'll put their hand in the crook of my arm as I'm walking down the street. Kind of a Old school gentleman thing to do.
 

Atom Smasher

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I grab my girl's hand and she grabs mine all the time. However, she is forbidden in manly places like hardware stores and such. She starts to grab it and then remembers and says, "Oh, not here" LOL.

She fully accepts that and even likes it. Other than that, we are frequently holding hands.
 

Billtx49

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I grab my girl's hand and she grabs mine all the time. However, she is forbidden in manly places like hardware stores and such. She starts to grab it and then remembers and says, "Oh, not here" LOL.

She fully accepts that and even likes it. Other than that, we are frequently holding hands.
A situational awareness and respect that many women do not have. The emotional aspect is usually the primary driver blocking common sense with so many…
The confidence and ability to temporarily relinquish her self perceived emotional control and physical attachment to her man is what helps make a unicorn.
 

SeekerOfTheWay

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I grab my girl's hand and she grabs mine all the time. However, she is forbidden in manly places like hardware stores and such. She starts to grab it and then remembers and says, "Oh, not here" LOL.

She fully accepts that and even likes it. Other than that, we are frequently holding hands.

A situational awareness and respect that many women do not have. The emotional aspect is usually the primary driver blocking common sense with so many…
The confidence and ability to temporarily relinquish her self perceived emotional control and physical attachment to her man is what helps make a unicorn.
This is great and so true. I think it takes some self awareness, maturity and confidence to understand this. Women need to let their men be men.

One of my guys loves when i am super affectionate with him and run my fingers through his hair and hold his hand. But there’s a time and place for that. i think many women do those things as a sign of ownership over their man or to show they are dominant. Something like that.

I would never do those things when we were on a motorcycle ride with the boys or anywhere where he is supposed to be leading me. It’s not sexist to me, it’s like you said, situational awareness. On the bike he’ll reach back and rub my leg for a few seconds to show affection and love and i will place my hand on his bicep as he doee that. But it’s unspoken that i wouldn’t initiate those acts out with the guys.

This might be too cheesy for a men’s forum, but this thread reminded me of this passage from Gibran (about marriage):

But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.

Love one another, but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.

Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.
 

RickTheToad

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Damn you guys are going hard on Rick lmao
@Brooks is a funny dude. We'll break him out of his inceldom soon enough. He'll get the courage to approach and talk many ladies in time. He just needs to read up on some books and read the forum. He's no threat to me. I wish him well and honestly hope he receives the guidance that will just give him the success needed to build confidence with the ladies. Most people do not like challenges in life; nor the people who put them to task. It's normal to attack and criticize what we don't know, what we don't understand or are afraid of. I am sure most of us have been in his shoes in some part of our young adult lives. It's all good.

Just wish he'd stop picking on my dapper suit and tie. I really tried to look good for my new profile photo. ;'p
 
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