"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Flakes but buys me drinks

XThrax

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I dated a woman who asked me to lunch. After a few times we rescheduled we finally had a drink together. She paid for my drink because of how flaky she was being. So we are about to be on the second date and everything seems good, I do some planning to end the night at my place. She flakes again, but offers again the buy me the next round. At this point I dont want to have another drink. She is probably screwing another guy at my own inconvenience.
So the question is should I delete her number and forget her, or should I raise the chips and tell her she needs to get dirty with me if she wants to continue.
My Johnson administration tell me I have nothing to lose by raising the chips.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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SeekerOfTheWay

Senior Don Juan
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She’s buying you drinks but wasting your time. What’s more important to you?
 

jaymbrs

Master Don Juan
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Delete the number. Her buying you 1 drink is to keep your interest, which I think is ridiculous. She should be paying for the whole tab. My time is more valuable than 1 free drink.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

GrowingPains

Master Don Juan
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Just pull back and keep building the rotation. If she pursues, let her do most of the work. If she doesn't... Well, next.

Sounds like you haven't had enough interaction to determine you should drop her.
 

Mazer

Master Don Juan
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Friend zoned. She buys you drinks, that way she doesn’t feel like she “owes” you sex. I dated a woman who told me she would pay for drinks on her dates because she didn’t want the guy to expect sex from her if he bought the drinks. She friend zoned all of the guys she wasn’t sexually attracted. Im not saying this is what’s happening here but sounds a bit like it.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

Master Don Juan
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Friend zoned. She buys you drinks, that way she doesn’t feel like she “owes” you sex. I dated a woman who told me she would pay for drinks on her dates because she didn’t want the guy to expect sex from her if he bought the drinks. She friend zoned all of the guys she wasn’t sexually attracted. Im not saying this is what’s happening here but sounds a bit like it.
This. Did not smash = low sex drive

#nextset
 

marmel75

Master Don Juan
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I dated a woman who asked me to lunch. After a few times we rescheduled we finally had a drink together. She paid for my drink because of how flaky she was being. So we are about to be on the second date and everything seems good, I do some planning to end the night at my place. She flakes again, but offers again the buy me the next round. At this point I dont want to have another drink. She is probably screwing another guy at my own inconvenience.
So the question is should I delete her number and forget her, or should I raise the chips and tell her she needs to get dirty with me if she wants to continue.
My Johnson administration tell me I have nothing to lose by raising the chips.
Tell her no drink, she can make it up to you by cooking you dinner at her place or she can lose your number.

Likely she will lose your number. Doesn't sound interested but doesnt hurt to have some balls.
 

XThrax

Don Juan
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Tell her no drink, she can make it up to you by cooking you dinner at her place or she can lose your number.

Likely she will lose your number. Doesn't sound interested but doesnt hurt to have some balls.
I kind of like this idea but I dont think I will pursue unless she randomly text me again. If she does then she can set up the date.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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