Thank you SoSuave

[rAFCOliver]

So I thought I’d share my story of my breakup and how I got to SS.

Long story short, I was a very confident, underlying Beta in disguise salesman. Polar opposite huh?

Well, I got into a relationship at work in a male dominated company, things were going well until she started pulling away from me after a family loss. I compensated by giving her too much attention, being available, all the traits of a man without power, sound familiar?

Well, one night I hit the roof, she’s in other departments, I work late, hear giggling incessantly and I pop through to the floor and it’s like she’s shocked I’m still there, pretty much that was the end for me. I’d had enough but being myself I wanted to cling onto the relationship for companionship etc. Absolutely pathetic I know. I proceed to get absolutely wasted, ensues an argument over text then I go searching on the web for advice and that’s when I came across this absolute goldmine of a forum/website. I look into the breakup articles, when to end it etc, the usual stuff. The next morning, I pick up the phone with a horrendous hangover and call her, she’s distant, couldn’t really be bothered with the call, explains all this **** about not being cautious around me without having Male friends then for a crippling beta Male (which I’m actively changing), I decide to say that’s it I’m done after reading an article on here about when to breakup with someone.

For the first 20 minutes was instant relief, the next month and a half was hell, I’m not gunna lie. But guess what? This is the perfect time to become a better man. I’m sharing this post for similar guys that get lead to this forum cause there ex ended it or they broke up from a toxic relationship. This forum has solid advisors, great articles and I’ve got my confidence back, however this has been fast tracked purely from absorbing information on this forum.

- I’ve went no contact near enough 50 days, she’s reached out once, I ignored.
- I give her nothing at work, no conversation, I don’t even look at her.
- I walk around with a smile on my face.
- I’m becoming a better, vastly improved man than I was prior to the relationship and during.
- I’ve gotten a new wardrobe.
- I’ve lost 20lbs, in probably the cleanest shape of my life.
- I’m working through the DJ bible which is pure gold.

All of this wouldn’t have been possible without you guys and I owe you a massive thanks. It’s taken me till now till move on fully and the raw aggression and determination I have is something I’ve never expierenced in my life.

I’ll continue to be on this forum, this is just the start.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

So I thought I’d share my story of my breakup and how I got to SS.

Long story short, I was a very confident, underlying Beta in disguise salesman. Polar opposite huh?

Well, I got into a relationship at work in a male dominated company, things were going well until she started pulling away from me after a family loss. I compensated by giving her too much attention, being available, all the traits of a man without power, sound familiar?

Well, one night I hit the roof, she’s in other departments, I work late, hear giggling incessantly and I pop through to the floor and it’s like she’s shocked I’m still there, pretty much that was the end for me. I’d had enough but being myself I wanted to cling onto the relationship for companionship etc. Absolutely pathetic I know. I proceed to get absolutely wasted, ensues an argument over text then I go searching on the web for advice and that’s when I came across this absolute goldmine of a forum/website. I look into the breakup articles, when to end it etc, the usual stuff. The next morning, I pick up the phone with a horrendous hangover and call her, she’s distant, couldn’t really be bothered with the call, explains all this **** about not being cautious around me without having Male friends then for a crippling beta Male (which I’m actively changing), I decide to say that’s it I’m done after reading an article on here about when to breakup with someone.

For the first 20 minutes was instant relief, the next month and a half was hell, I’m not gunna lie. But guess what? This is the perfect time to become a better man. I’m sharing this post for similar guys that get lead to this forum cause there ex ended it or they broke up from a toxic relationship. This forum has solid advisors, great articles and I’ve got my confidence back, however this has been fast tracked purely from absorbing information on this forum.

- I’ve went no contact near enough 50 days, she’s reached out once, I ignored.
- I give her nothing at work, no conversation, I don’t even look at her.
- I walk around with a smile on my face.
- I’m becoming a better, vastly improved man than I was prior to the relationship and during.
- I’ve gotten a new wardrobe.
- I’ve lost 20lbs, in probably the cleanest shape of my life.
- I’m working through the DJ bible which is pure gold.

All of this wouldn’t have been possible without you guys and I owe you a massive thanks. It’s taken me till now till move on fully and the raw aggression and determination I have is something I’ve never expierenced in my life.

I’ll continue to be on this forum, this is just the start.

What was the giggling about? I dont see what the problem was?

 

[rAFCOliver]

What was the giggling about? I dont see what the problem was?

Consistently flirting with co-workers for about a week after she had been pulling away from me, acting distant for about 2-3 weeks.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Consistently flirting with co-workers for about a week after she had been pulling away from me, acting distant for about 2-3 weeks.

Alot of women flirt. Even married. But you did right for you.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

She was pulling away at the same time looking to monkey branch

Thats our assumption.

 

[Spaz]

I think I popped into nc thread and had a chit chat with you once upon a time.

You did good. Go read up POOK.

 

[rAFCOliver]

I think I popped into nc thread and had a chit chat with you once upon a time.

You did good. Go read up POOK.

Yeah you did, those words of advice kicked me into a realisation, I was ready to leave but you went a soft ... has that much power over you. Wake up call, thanks man - like I said, great advisors on this forum.

 

[Masculinity]

Yeah you did, those words of advice kicked me into a realisation, I was ready to leave but you went a soft ... has that much power over you. Wake up call, thanks man - like I said, great advisors on this forum.

Congratulations for sticking it out, OP.

Improvement and success stories are gold. We need to hear about more guys talking the talk and walking the walk.

 

[The Duke]

rAFCOliver - Good for you! Onward and Upward.

 

[rAFCOliver]

Congratulations for sticking it out, OP.

Improvement and success stories are gold. We need to hear about more guys talking the talk and walking the walk.

Thought I’d share my expierence. This forum has been so beneficial in recovery. I’d hate to think what I would’ve been like without the advice.

 

[nicksaiz65]

Thought I’d share my expierence. This forum has been so beneficial in recovery. I’d hate to think what I would’ve been like without the advice.

This is definitely my favorite website ever too. Crazy how an online community can change your life

 

[Spaz]

Yeah you did, those words of advice kicked me into a realisation, I was ready to leave but you went a soft ... has that much power over you. Wake up call, thanks man - like I said, great advisors on this forum.

I'm glad that you found strength and comfort within my post to you.

Replicate it to others, as payment ?

 

[rAFCOliver]

I'm glad that you found strength and comfort within my post to you.

Replicate it to others, as payment ?

I’ve helped two people so far, giving them my advice on their breakup, I’ll definitely be doing more moving forward.

 

[rAFCOliver]

Awesome. Let this change continue till you die. If your life changed so much by this what else is out there? Grab your balls and find what you’re made of

100% totally agree, it’s crazy how such an event can have a profound change on your life. I’m alive, feeling so much better than ever before. I’ll be really developing my career and any areas of personal weakness that I’ll identify as I go on.

 

[backseatjuan]

There will come a time in your life sometime down the road when you will find another woman and you would think something to the lines of her being so special and so one of a kind that she was a God's send to you. You will at that point get a desire to turn back into afc with her, forget everything you learned here, basically submit to her thinking you find the one. That kind of relationship might last a year, but eventually that woman will see in you what your girlfriend at work saw in you, and she will do her woman thing and leave for another man. Best thing is to imagine yourself in the middle of an empty field standing under a tree, and there is this light over you, it is the game shining brightly onto you, all around is darkness and in this darkness are women, calling you over, enticing you into a commitment. Once you leave the light you're under you will enter darkness and that woman will no longer see you. You will be in the territory of feminism and champdom and no longer desirable. Never turn your back from the game, always remember she only loves you because she's afraid of loosing you.

Don't be mad at that woman from your work place. She has opened you your eyes. Thank her.

 

[Spaz]

Don't be mad at that woman from your work place. She has opened you your eyes. Thank her.

^Good mindset that will take away a man from being a victim to being a winner.

 

[rAFCOliver]

^Good mindset that will take away a man from being a victim to being a winner.

True, without the split I wouldn’t have turned into the man I am today.