You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
How necessary do you think it is to get the phone number first? I used to have more luck back when i was better at this by just setting up the date right on the app.You'll get a lot of flakes. It's a numbers game. Of 50 girls, you might only have a convo with 2. Of two of those, you might only set up a date with one, and that one might flake. Honestly, OLD is a pretty massive waste of time in general, but it can work.
I think in terms of getting the date - it's important to bounce to text quickly. I'd say after a good 5-10 solid messages, you can just go with something like "here, text me xxx-xxx-xxxx". Or even just give her an excuse: "here, this app sucks, text me: xxx-xxx-xxxx" or whatever. You're not writing a book here, you don't have time to sit there all day and try to schmooze these girls. Get in and get out. A few playful, mildly sexual messages back and forth and go for it.
Once you're texting, you should relatively quickly be setting a date up, once she feels mildly comfortable. I don't think it has to be super clever. You can work it into things or your inside jokes in a clever way, or just come with "let's grab a drink soon, when are you free?". You want to find out with very little effort whether she's willing to meet up or not, so that you can move on to the next one if she doesn't. You shouldn't be spending more than 3 days messaging IMO before trying to set something up.
Another thing is being PATIENT. I think one of the best ways to scare them off is messaging back quickly. You should not be checking this thing every hour. It should periodically be 3-4 hrs later or the next day when you get back. Sometimes even longer. Rules can be stupid, but take like twice as long to message back as it took her to get back to you.
At least those are my thoughts on it.
I mean i'm a big fan of it. I really think it crosses some "mental barrier" for them and makes them more comfortable and more familiar. For a lot of girls, meeting some dude off tinder directly is slutty and weird, but having a good convo and texting a bit first is a lot different. Idk bro, girls are weird. But it's seemed to work well in my experience. Plus you immediately feel out how compliant they are and it's a very easy way to gauge interest. If a girl isn't willing to transition to text, i wouldn't waste much more time. Of course, some girls will give a minor resistance to texting you and give you sh&t, but in the end, if they're interested, they will text in my experience.How necessary do you think it is to get the phone number first? I used to have more luck back when i was better at this by just setting up the date right on the app.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
How do you ask for the date? Should i just straight up give a date, place and time, or do you usually ask then when they're free? Asking them sounds kind of wimpy to me, but if works....It's a numbers game. Ask for the date within the first 5 messages. Anything else is just spinning your wheels.
Simple.How do you fellas set up your dates on OLD?
I think i lost my mojo, convos are going fine, but it goes downhill as soon as i try to set a date.
It's in my sig. I start with a 2 lines of small talk, then throw this feeler out first -How do you ask for the date? Should i just straight up give a date, place and time, or do you usually ask then when they're free? Asking them sounds kind of wimpy to me, but if works....
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
It's weird, i get the feeling that i might be scaring them off for setting the date up too soon, but then again, i dont want to waste all conversation topics on the internet.Its all about screening out the low interest women and the women that I have low interest in. There is truly more to looks when you have abundance and OLD is all about the looks. So take the time to swap a few messages back and forth and at least find out what stuff she is interested in. She may be super attractive but tells me that she is a major feminist. Next!
I dont advocate to message back and forth for days before setting up at date however. If there is attraction on your end and she at least shows mutual interests as you (hobbies, what she likes doing for fun, etc) set the date up. It can be as simple as "It was good chatting with you but I have a very busy schedule today and I have to run. Let me know your availability and we can meet up for a drink and pick this good convo back up".
Thats it. Set the date and then try not to initiate too much communication between then and the date. It is important to set the date up soon, within 2-3 days is good so there isnt too much time for her to second guess, think she found a better option, chat too long over text and then there is no mystery, etc.
The idea is to get them out on a date, have them come over and hang out, etc.It's weird, i get the feeling that i might be scaring them off for setting the date up too soon, but then again, i dont want to waste all conversation topics on the internet.
Hey let's go get drinks. How about Tuesday or Thursday?. We can go to this fun retro bar I know.How do you ask for the date? Should i just straight up give a date, place and time, or do you usually ask then when they're free? Asking them sounds kind of wimpy to me, but if works....
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
How far do you set the date to? I'm not putting a lot of faith in these dates set 5 days away with someone i met online.“Why don’t we __________ this Saturday?”
I have always found that phrase to be very effective. I think it might set up a question in her mind something like, “Yeah, why not take a chance with this guy?”
Try out the official Atom Smasher branded “Why don’t we _____ ?” That became my go-to phrase once I saw how well it worked.
Most pickup gurus and biz guy say its that principle of 1/3.How do you fellas set up your dates on OLD?
I think i lost my mojo, convos are going fine, but it goes downhill as soon as i try to set a date.
If I acquired digits, I setup social encounter (not date) ASAP. I am talking, within the week. She gets a Monday or a Tuesday. Never a fru/Saturday /Sunday. If I smashed, I might give a Sunday or Wed night.How far do you set the date to? I'm not putting a lot of faith in these dates set 5 days away with someone i met online.
Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.
I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.
Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules. Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.