"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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She still likes her ex's social media. Should I be worried?

vanballmoos

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I just got back into dating some I'm a little rusty.

I met this girl through a really good mutual friend of mine a little over a month ago. We seem to be hitting it off. The issue is she likes about every other picture her ex has posted. They broke up in early October. From what my buddy told me is he broke up with her, he tried to reconcile shortly after, she said no, but she told him she was struggling with the breakup and he said he was too.

I just don't want to set myself up and or waste my time, because I really am interested in her.

I’m trying to tell myself it’s just her liking the content. She’ll like her other ex’s pictures too, but he’s from years ago. According to my friednd, she’ll even like pictures of old flings that didn’t work out, so maybe she’s just weird?

Either way should I be worried?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Glassguy

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She is still living in the past and you are a rebound
Yes........I would withdraw some attention, make her wonder why and only ask her to come over and hang out. Nothing more. Turn her into a fvck buddy and demote her. If she gets over him later on and states she wants more, then its your decision. Until then you will be strung along according to her emotional roller coaster over the ex and will have little to no control. One thing is for sure, you need to take control of the situation.

Probably wouldnt hurt to start hitting up other chicks and have them like your stuff on FB lol.
 

chris2for

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She's trying but she probably won't be able to. The next guy after you may get her as a relatively tabula rasa(of course they carry their baggage with them forever)

You should not have gotten exclusive with her after only a month of dating
I don't know. If she's liking his stuff, to me that's not trying to move on. Trying to move on would be avoiding her social media altogether.
 

chris2for

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She is literally dating o p as a rebound to try to move on. That doesn't mean she is being successful of course
I hear you but I think there's a difference between using someone as a distraction vs wanting to genuinely move on.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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vanballmoos

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She's trying but she probably won't be able to. The next guy after you may get her as a relatively tabula rasa(of course they carry their baggage with them forever)

You should not have gotten exclusive with her after only a month of dating
My buddy did tell me that after she turned him away that she was blowing up his phone saying stuff like the breakup really messed with her, how she wanted to stay but couldn't. Then a little later the I'm having a hard time message followed. Also he's also under the impression he tried she tried to make him jealous. She snapped a video of her food and then showed the guy she was on a date with. Not quite sure it sounds like she was trying to make him jealous though.
 

lizardking82

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Why should this be any of your concern? You are trying to lock this girl down into a relationship, that is not your job, dude. If you got to stick your penis into her vagina, make sure you keep doing that. If she thinks you are worth it, she will push for the relationship in no time. Right now, she's pushing more to get the attention of her ex because apparently, she's got you all locked in.
 

bizzym

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Why should this be any of your concern? You are trying to lock this girl down into a relationship, that is not your job, dude. If you got to stick your penis into her vagina, make sure you keep doing that. If she thinks you are worth it, she will push for the relationship in no time. Right now, she's pushing more to get the attention of her ex because apparently, she's got you all locked in.
I'm not big on social media-how does liking his pictures mean she's trying to get his attention, especially if she likes other flings and exes posts?
 

lizardking82

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I'm not big on social media-how does liking his pictures mean she's trying to get his attention, especially if she likes other flings and exes posts?
Again, you're focusing on the wrong thing here. Open your eyes, you are micro managing this woman like she's the only woman left on Earth. If you had a busier life, dreams, projects, if you were trying new things, you wouldn't even have the time or the nerve to think why is this or that woman liking her ex's pictures...dude, this sounds like sth a woman would worry about.
 

bizzym

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Again, you're focusing on the wrong thing here. Open your eyes, you are micro managing this woman like she's the only woman left on Earth. If you had a busier life, dreams, projects, if you were trying new things, you wouldn't even have the time or the nerve to think why is this or that woman liking her ex's pictures...dude, this sounds like sth a woman would worry about.
I'm not OP. I'm just curious to see how this social media thing works.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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