"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

Girl I used to have a thing has gotten in touch? Sign of interest?

S

Sgthaytham

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 28, 2015
Messages
397
Reaction score
128
Age
32
This is the second time she has done this. Once just before the summer, and once last night.

She sends me « I just heard you were in (place I go for the holidays) this summer, shame we didn’t see eachother »

I haven’t bothered answering her yet since I’m getting ready for work.

Seems like, at the very least, she’s trying to get my attention.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Urbanyst

Urbanyst

Banned
Joined
Jan 28, 2017
Messages
2,382
Reaction score
1,787
Age
42
Location
The City
Rather than calibrating around what she "might" or might not want... decide what YOU want and try to get it.
 
S

Sgthaytham

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 28, 2015
Messages
397
Reaction score
128
Age
32
deesade said:
She's unlikely to take it to asking you out, if that's what you are waiting for.

It's enough for her to say hi. She even broaches the topic of seeing you... so take it from there.

If she ghosts when you try to escalate in any meaningful way, only to come back a week or month later, then you are just dealing with an attention bore.
Click to expand...
I think I'm already dealing with one...


I replied to her initial message with: "I had a great time over there. How was yours?"

And she answers with "Complicated".

Apparently, she worked the whole 2 months and hasn't been paid.


I can't be bothered listening to her complain and rant on about her issues... it's not my place.
 
TheGambino

TheGambino

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 25, 2013
Messages
2,751
Reaction score
970
Location
Somewhere
Sgthaytham said:
I think I'm already dealing with one...


I replied to her initial message with: "I had a great time over there. How was yours?"

And she answers with "Complicated".

Apparently, she worked the whole 2 months and hasn't been paid.


I can't be bothered listening to her complain and rant on about her issues... it's not my place.
Click to expand...
Only do if she deserves it..
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

S

Sgthaytham

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 28, 2015
Messages
397
Reaction score
128
Age
32
TheGambino said:
Only do if she deserves it..
Click to expand...
Under these circumstances, should I respond to her or not?

I mean, she gets in touch out-of-the-blue, but then gives me a one-word response but later explains it's because she's mad she hasn't been paid?
 
Roober

Roober

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 2, 2016
Messages
2,372
Reaction score
2,120
Sgthaytham said:
I think I'm already dealing with one...


I replied to her initial message with: "I had a great time over there. How was yours?"

And she answers with "Complicated".

Apparently, she worked the whole 2 months and hasn't been paid.


I can't be bothered listening to her complain and rant on about her issues... it's not my place.
Click to expand...
Women talk, you listen, you both drink --> sex happens

If you have no interest in this woman, why even make a thread?
 
S

Sgthaytham

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 28, 2015
Messages
397
Reaction score
128
Age
32
Roober said:
Women talk, you listen, you both drink --> sex happens

If you have no interest in this woman, why even make a thread?
Click to expand...
I do, I do.

I'm just finding it hard based on her responses.

She initiates, which is good, but then responses to my question with a one-worded answer?
 
N

narcissist

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 10, 2013
Messages
1,391
Reaction score
498
Location
New York, NY
assssssskkkk ouuuuttttttttttttt. Don't be a covert dumb dumb. No MORE BEATING AROUND THE FVCKING BUSH
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

nismo-4

nismo-4

Moderator
Joined
Jan 31, 2005
Messages
4,439
Reaction score
1,143
Location
From New Orleans, Louisiana to Atlanta, Georgia!!!
Ask her out and say it in terse terms. Like we're either going out or f**k off. Drop if she balks, you're not there to be some orbiter.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
Top