"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Question about flaking

J

Juanto

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So I met this girl on a meetup event,and sent her a message after through the app saying that we should go out the week after since she was staying in a hostel very close to my place. She replied the day after agreeing to this, so next I setup a concrete date, time and place for a couple of days later. She says she cant that day, but made a counteroffer for the next one, wednesday. I said OK, no problem. The same happened on the wednesday, she said something came up and asked to meet up on thursday. Again, I agreed.

Obviously since I know a bit about the nature of girls in general, I suggested a place really close to me just in case she flaked. And guess what, not only did she flake but she didnt even send a message saying she couldnt or anything of the sort.

Now, I know this isnt exactly nothing new, but how usually does this happen to you as well? Is this disrespectul behaviour a normal ocurrence?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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MrOctober

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Within these past 3 weeks I had two girls.

Girl one - texted one night. Suggested a meet up I couldn't and she ghosted on my attempted reschedule (deleted text thread).

Later that week I get a hey and banged her.

Girl two - literally same deal but actually flaked on an arranged meet up I said "you ready?" Nothing.

later that week SAME thing and smashed it.

I'm noticing a pattern.
So no it's not possible and this back to back scenario has me thinking these were screens, I confirmed I wasn't a weirdo.
 
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EyeBRollin

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You never accept a counter offer for 24 hours later. You should have countered her counter offer with a different day, to exercise backbone.

Sorry, pal. She nexted you for being weak.
 
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EyeBRollin

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MrOctober said:
Within these past 3 weeks I had two girls.

Girl one - texted one night. Suggested a meet up I couldn't and she ghosted on my attempted reschedule (deleted text thread).

Later that week I get a hey and banged her.

Girl two - literally same deal but actually flaked on an arranged meet up I said "you ready?" Nothing.

later that week SAME thing and smashed it.

I'm noticing a pattern.
So no it's not possible and this back to back scenario has me thinking these were screens, I confirmed I wasn't a weirdo.
Click to expand...
Just because you banged, doesn't mean she respects you. Her #1 option could have flaked, or she could be screwing to spite another guy.

If a woman flakes, she's out. Low interest and disrespect. No exceptions.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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MrOctober

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EyeBRollin said:
Just because you banged, doesn't mean she respects you. Her #1 option could have flaked, or she could be screwing to spite another guy.

If a woman flakes, she's out. Low interest and disrespect. No exceptions.
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I agree and this idea should be promoted here.

Neither one I've communicated with since. Sure I'll hear from one. I sit back. I field.

But respect is the foundation of any true dating / rs / fb dynamic couldn't agree more.
 
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Juanto

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EyeBRollin said:
You never accept a counter offer for 24 hours later. You should have countered her counter offer with a different day, to exercise backbone.

Sorry, pal. She nexted you for being weak.
Click to expand...
Lesson learned.
 
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Juanto

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MrOctober said:
Within these past 3 weeks I had two girls.

Girl one - texted one night. Suggested a meet up I couldn't and she ghosted on my attempted reschedule (deleted text thread).

Later that week I get a hey and banged her.
Click to expand...
How often does this really happen?
 
D

dude99

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Juanto said:
So I met this girl on a meetup event,and sent her a message after through the app saying that we should go out the week after since she was staying in a hostel very close to my place. She replied the day after agreeing to this, so next I setup a concrete date, time and place for a couple of days later. She says she cant that day, but made a counteroffer for the next one, wednesday. I said OK, no problem. The same happened on the wednesday, she said something came up and asked to meet up on thursday. Again, I agreed.

Obviously since I know a bit about the nature of girls in general, I suggested a place really close to me just in case she flaked. And guess what, not only did she flake but she didnt even send a message saying she couldnt or anything of the sort.

Now, I know this isnt exactly nothing new, but how usually does this happen to you as well? Is this disrespectul behaviour a normal ocurrence?
Click to expand...
When a girl counter offers sometimes it is good to let them know you are busy and you have options.

Saying yes to both of her counter offers told her you had no other plans that week and you were sitting by waiting for her.

Next time if a chick counter offers then cancels again and counteroffers a 2nd time you should be busy and tell her that doesn't work for me and i will talk to you later.
 
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Juanto

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dude99 said:
Next time if a chick counter offers then cancels again and counteroffers a 2nd time you should be busy and tell her that doesn't work for me and i will talk to you later.
Click to expand...
Yes, I think I dropped the ball on this detail
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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MrOctober

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Juanto said:
How often does this really happen?
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Not often lol. Take they're advice. It was just ironic.

You can give her two strikes but really only if you know she's attracted and you'll get at the least the results I got. That's my opinion.

But a girl on the fence take they're advice.
 
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